Amos Haggard is a gargantuan, warty old toad of a character. Along with Roderick, his idiot son, he spends most of his time carousing with prostitutes and servant girls, imbibing copious amounts of Madeira wine, evicting the poor, and expectorating on and firing his pistols at poachers, dissenters, and foreigners. Eventually, in order to escape their unpaid debts and an impending duel, Haggard and his son are forced to flee their rural estate and embark upon an unscheduled Grand Tour where they continue their vile, debauched behavior amid the crowned heads of Europe. Michael Green's comic classic--republished here on its 25th anniversary with an array of new episodes not included in the original--is a hilariously unreconstructed romp through the seamier side of 18th-century life.
As any reader of Tom Jones knows, the 18th century was the golden age of squires, practically all known for staggering from one drunken spasm of bad behavior to the next. Green, an English journalist, parodied the type back in 1948 with his Squire Haggard, and met with a surprisingly enthusiastic response; he has updated his parody for this reissue. Haggard's typical entries begin with some notation of the invariably miserable weather (typically "Fog," "Sleet," or "Gales") followed by itemization of recent deaths, either by exotic disease, like "Bloating of the Bowels," or by some witless human act, such as drinking a pail of ale in one continuous swallow. Haggard then plunges into his own affairs in his inimitable style, abbreviating freely and capriciously. Sometimes the squire has his slow days: "Lay on my bed nearly all day, shootg. at tradesmen who approached the Hall with bills and succeeded in damaging a particularly obnoxious grocer." Generally, though, Haggard forestalls spleen by engaging in the time-honored pursuits of whoring, drunkenness, gluttony and avoiding his creditors. For amusement, there are always Dissenters, Frenchmen, cripples and people in the stocks to trip up, spit at or insult. Although loaded with debt, Haggard finds relief in the form of his son Roderick's engagement to the well-endowed and wealthy Fanny Foulacre. Alas, Roderick succumbs to the Amorous Passion before his wedding day and is caught by his father-in-law to be, Sir Josh. Foulacre, a keen shot and avid duelist. Father and son flee, first to Bath, then to London, then to the Continent. Anglophiles will find this irresistible, but Green's Englishness might puzzle American tastes.
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