9781933929804

The Faggiest Vampire

Carlton Mellick III

Average Customer Review: 4.5 (3 reviews) Latest Reviews
ISBN 10: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4
ISBN 13: 9781933929804
Publisher: Spunk Goblin Press
Publication Date: 2009-03-27
Binding:
Editorial Reviews:
Synopsis:

Deep in The Land of Broodsarrow, just outside the village of Gneirwil, and high on a cliff overlooking the Everbleed Sea, there stands the faggiest gothic castle that any mortal being has ever seen. Living in this ancient faggy castle is none other than the well-renowned vampire, Dargoth Van Gloomfang. The citizenry of Broodsarrow sure has its share of faggy vampires, but old Dargoth has always been by far the faggiest of them all. That is, until a new vampire came to town. A younger, hippper vampire. One that emits such a grand amount of fagginess that one cannot help but be completely overwhelmed by his presence. Now Dargoth Van Gloomfang must figure out a way to out-shine this young newcomer if he wishes to ever reclaim his throne as . . . the faggiest vampire.


Customer Reviews:
4 2009-10-05
Bizarro Children's Book By Forrest P. Graham

This was a fun read. When I first heard that Mellick was releasing a children's book I shrugged it off. I knew I would read it, but it wasn't really my thing (I'm not a child nor do I have children) so I didn't give it much thought. When it arrived in the mail I read it in one sitting (just over 100 pages with illustrations) and I was really surprised at how much I liked it. The best part is, this really is a children's book and when I have kids, I will read this to them. It's a light-hearted read and the word "faggy" is used in the same vein as "cool" or "awesome". There is no hate here, so calm down bleeding hearts. If you're looking for a fresh take on the Bizarro genre, pick up this book. I'm proud to say I have an original piece of art from the book signed by Mr. Mellick himself hanging in my office.

5 2009-05-24
The Faggiest Vampire IS a Children's Book! (and it rules!) By Kevin Shamel

Who is the Faggiest Vampire? You'll find out. When I bought this book I was told it really is a children's book. So I decided to read it as I'd read most children's books--not read it myself until I read it aloud to my kids. I'm glad I did, though I must say, it was difficult to not read ahead. It was especially difficult after my wife DID read the whole thing at once and came to tell me how simply excellent it is. The boys and I (they are four and eleven) had a good time reading a few chapters a night. At first the eleven-year-old was not really hip on snuggling up for a bedtime story, but when I told him the title, he was in. It really is an excellent book. It really is a children's book. It's beautifully, hilariously illustrated by Carlton Mellick III. Both the boys liked to take time to check out the drawings inside. It's a gorgeous book. The story itself is wise, funny, and fabletastic. CM3 has done a fabulous job of writing a book that entertains both parents and kids, and teaches some lessons about life (and mustache grooming). We follow Dargoth Van Gloomfang and his quest to maintain his title as Faggiest Vampire in Broodsarrow while a younger, faggier vampire on the scene strives to steal it. We discover the ins and outs of champion mustachery and modern vampirical aspirations. We learn the mysteries of haberdasheries and happiness! Truly a pleasure to read, THE FAGGIEST VAMPIRE will please kids, make everyone laugh out loud, and even make you think. It was really fun to read it like I did, but my wife's pretty happy with reading it straight through, too. I loved my first Bizarro children's book. I know my kids loved it, too. In fact, my sons want to add that they loved it, and it's funny, and it rocks. And thank you for writing it, Carlton!

5 2009-04-27
Mustaches of the World Unite! By Charles Glover

Dargoth squares off with younger, faggier vampire Baron Van Ravengraves in this hilarious "children's" book about a group of vampires living in a town that never changes. They are preparing for the annual mustache competition, and Dargoth the reigning champ fears he will lose. He and his assistant Rococo will stop at nothing to make sure he wins. Fans of Edward Gorey will love this book. The illustrations are similar to his and the story, while a bit longer than most of Gorey's work, is told in a similar style. The story is brief but interesting. The funny thing is, it could actually be told to children. The story, unlike many Mellick titles, is lighthearted, clean fun with a nice lesson at the end. Don't get me wrong... fans of Bizarro will love this one. Something for everyone. And don't forget to comb your mustache.

 
Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought:

Shatnerquake
Jeff Burk

4.0

The Baby Jesus Butt Plug
Carlton Mellick III

4.0

Apeshit
Carlton Mellick III

4.5

The Egg Man
Carlton Mellick III

5.0

The Faggiest Vampire: Search Results

1. The Faggiest Vampire (ISBN: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4)
III, Carlton Mellick
Bookseller: Paperbackshop-US (Elk Grove Village, IL, U.S.A.)
Bookseller Rating: 5-star rating
Quantity Available: > 20

Book Description: Spunk Goblin Press. PAPERBACK. Book Condition: New. 1933929804 New print-on-demand book produced in the US and delivered from our US warehouse in 10-14 days. Bookseller Inventory # IP-9781933929804

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller | Ask Bookseller a Question

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 9.08
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 3.99
Within U.S.A.
2. The Faggiest Vampire (ISBN: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4)
Carlton Mellick III
Bookseller: Armadillo Books (Norristown, PA, U.S.A.)
Bookseller Rating: 5-star rating
Quantity Available: 1

Book Description: Spunk Goblin Press. Book Condition: New. Great Shape! 2009 Paperback. Bookseller Inventory # FG-33816

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller | Ask Bookseller a Question

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 9.82
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 3.99
Within U.S.A.
3. The Faggiest Vampire (ISBN: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4)
III, Carlton Mellick
Bookseller: Books2Anywhere.com (Fairford, GLO, United Kingdom)
Bookseller Rating: 5-star rating
Quantity Available: > 20

Book Description: Spunk Goblin Press. PAPERBACK. Book Condition: New. 1933929804 Brand new print-on-demand book produced in the US and delivered from our US warehouse in 7-10 days. Bookseller Inventory # IP-9781933929804

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller | Ask Bookseller a Question

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 8.67
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 5.18
From United Kingdom to U.S.A.
4. The Faggiest Vampire (Paperback) (ISBN: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4)
Carlton Mellick III
Bookseller: A1Books (Netcong, NJ, U.S.A.)
Bookseller Rating: 4-star rating
Quantity Available: > 20

Book Description: Book Condition: New. Brand new item. Over 6 million customers served. Order now. Selling online since 1995. Few left in stock - order soon. Code: U20091120102900G1933929804. SKU: 1933929804-11-UING. Bookseller Inventory # 1933929804-11-UING

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 13.10
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 3.95
Within U.S.A.
5. Faggiest Vampire (ISBN: 9781933929804)
Mellick III, Carlton
Bookseller: Paperbackshop-US (Elk Grove Village, IL, U.S.A.)
Bookseller Rating: 5-star rating
Quantity Available: > 20

Book Description: Spunk Goblin Press LP-9781933929804. Book Condition: New. New print-on-demand paperback produced in the UK and delivered from our UK warehouse in 10-14 days. Bookseller Inventory # LP-9781933929804

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller | Ask Bookseller a Question

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 13.31
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 3.99
Within U.S.A.
6. The Faggiest Vampire (Paperback) (ISBN: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4)
Carlton Mellick III
Bookseller: A1Books (WESTHAM EAST SUSSEX, ., United Kingdom)
Bookseller Rating: 5-star rating
Quantity Available: > 20

Book Description: Book Condition: New. DISPATCHED FROM USA. NO EXPEDITED SHIPPING! Allow 10-14 business days for delivery. Before ordering please check the language in the product description. Brand new item. Over 6 million customers served. Order now. Selling online since 1995. Few left in stock - order soon. Code: U20091120102900G1933929804. SKU: 1933929804-11-UING. Bookseller Inventory # 1933929804-11-UING

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 13.10
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 6.82
From United Kingdom to U.S.A.
7. The Faggiest Vampire (ISBN: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4)
III, Carlton Mellick
Bookseller: THE SAINT BOOKSTORE (Southport, MSY, United Kingdom)
Bookseller Rating: 5-star rating
Quantity Available: > 20

Book Description: Spunk Goblin Press. PAPERBACK. Book Condition: New. 1933929804 THIS BOOK IS PRINTED ESPECIALLY FOR YOUR ORDER, THIS MAY DELAY THE DELIVERY A FEW MORE DAYS THAN NORMAL ORDERS. Faggiest Vampire. Bookseller Inventory # B9781933929804

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller | Ask Bookseller a Question

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 14.61
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 9.91
From United Kingdom to U.S.A.
8. The Faggiest Vampire (ISBN: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4)
Mellick, Carlton, III
Bookseller: Revaluation Books (Exeter, DEV, United Kingdom)
Bookseller Rating: 5-star rating
Quantity Available: > 20

Book Description: Eraserhead Pr, 2009. Paperback. Book Condition: Brand New. 104 pages. 9.10x7.40x0.30 inches. In Stock. Delivery: UK usually 4-5 days, Europe/USA/ROW 7-10 days. Bookseller Inventory # x-1933929804

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller | Ask Bookseller a Question

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 17.89
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 8.24
From United Kingdom to U.S.A.
9. Faggiest Vampire (ISBN: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4)
Bookseller: ABC Books (Lowfield Heath, CRAWL, United Kingdom)
Bookseller Rating: 4-star rating
Quantity Available: 3

Book Description: Book Condition: New. Bookseller Inventory # S10695937

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller | Ask Bookseller a Question

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 22.99
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 21.67
From United Kingdom to U.S.A.
10. Faggiest Vampire (ISBN: 1933929804 / 1-933929-80-4)
Bookseller: AussieBookSeller (Mascot, NSW, Australia)
Bookseller Rating: 4-star rating
Quantity Available: 3

Book Description: Book Condition: New. Bookseller Inventory # S10695937

Bookseller & Payment Information | More Books from this Seller | Ask Bookseller a Question

Add Book to Shopping Basket
Price: US$ 25.18
Convert Currency
Shipping: US$ 28.00
From Australia to U.S.A.
View All Listings for this Book