If I was locked up in the slammer, then I’d be begging friends and relatives to send me books (if they were still having anything to do with a jailbird like me, of course) to help pass the hours, the days, the years. This article in the Austin American-Statesman shows how mixed up the Texas prison system is regarding what prisoners can and cannot read while in jail.

Prisoners can’t peruse certain books by Pablo Neruda and Andre Gide, both Nobel laureates. “Krik? Krak!” by Haitian writer Edwidge Danticat, who last year won a MacArthur “genius” grant, is prohibited behind Lone Star bars. Books of paintings by some of the world’s greatest artists — da Vinci, Picasso, Botticelli, Michelangelo — have been ordered out of state correctional facilities.

And just because a book is a best-seller in the free world doesn’t mean it’s available on the inside. Harold Robbins, Pat Conroy, Hunter S. Thompson, Dave Barry and James Patterson belong to the don’t-read fraternity. Mystery writer Carl Hiaasen does, too, as do Kinky Friedman and Janet Fitch, whose “White Oleander” was an Oprah’s Book Club selection.