The Thinking Person's Guide to Sobriety - Softcover

9780312254285: The Thinking Person's Guide to Sobriety
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Answering yes to these questions sparked Pluymen's realization that life could be so much more fulfilling if he was sober. This book is Bert Pluymen's story of struggle and triumph over alcohol addiction. It also contains insightful, witty, uplifting, and wryly humorous stories of the many people Pluymen met who were also searching for sobriety. This is an informative book that will shed new light on how alcohol abuse can ruin people's lives--even if they thought it could never happen to them.

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From the Publisher:
Praise for The Thinking Person's Guide to Sobriety:

"Much more than a book that shatters some of the most commonly held notions about alcoholism, The Thinking Person's Guide to Sobriety is about living a joyful, passionate, and peaceful life." --EastSide Weekend newsmagazine

"Plain talk and personal experiences make Bert Pluymen's book a real guide for anyone whose life has been touched by addiction. The section on women is especially good." --Ann W. Richards, former governor of Texas

"This book is not necessarily for the full-blown alcoholic, but for people who worry about whether their drinking has 'crossed the line.' Full of facts, interspersed with anecdotes, this is a worthy addition to alcoholism literature." --Donald W. Goodwin, M.D., author of Alcoholism: The Facts

"One of the best books I've ever read." --Cassandra Moreno, KWHY-TV, Los Angeles

"Uplifting, inspiring, enlightening. A must-read for people in early recovery, and all who want to stay up to date." --Charlie and Jeff, CBS Radio, "The Addiction and Recovery Show"

"This book is transformative. I can't begin to tell you how many people have been moved to examine their lives because of it." --Kate Jacobs, WKRC Radio, Cincinnati

From the Author:
When I quit drinking nine years ago with the support of a 12-Step group, my family, friends, and law partners all said: "You don't have a drinking problem. Why are you stopping?" But they didn't wake up in my body on a Saturday, when I'd feel horrible. I once heard that orange juice was good for a hangover, so I'd drink half-a-gallon with aspirin. Then I'd look in the mirror and promise myself that I'd never, ever do that again. And I wouldn't. For about three weeks. I would also stop drinking completely for a week, a month, even three months. Then I'd think, I don't have a problem with alcohol. I can stop anytime I want. So I'd say, "Give me a beer. Please! . . . In fact, make that two." I had no idea that alcohol addiction was an off-and-on disorder and that half of all addicted people are not drinking in any given month.

When I got sober I had a severe case of the "yets": I had yet to be arrested, yet to lose a job, and no drinking in the morning or shaking hands for me, thank you. But I knew that alcohol was a problem because I was regularly trying to moderate how much I drank. And the desire to drink moderately is known only to guess who? People with drinking problems. Normal men and women drink moderately without giving it a second thought.

And even though my drinking didn't interfere with work, my personal life was in a shambles, which prompted my recovery, as well as the chapter entitled, "Thirty Minutes Of Begging Is Not Foreplay."

Luckily I met many people in sobriety with drinking stories similar to mine. I could see myself in their lives, and perhaps you will, too. Included here are the eloquent voices of women (a marathoner, British flight attendant, basketball star, chemical engineer, and interior designer) as well as men (a writer, Australian entrepreneur, realtor, and San Francisco investor).

How do women and men of good will become addicted to alcohol? Well, we know that addiction runs in families and that some people are genetically predisposed to the disorder. In fact, I have one friend who laments, "If I hadn't inherited my alcoholism, my family would have left me nothing." However, for every person like him, with an unfortunate genetic tendency toward addiction, there are two of us who apparently manage to acquire this disorder on our very own. How? Through years of heavy social drinking. And what influences us most is the culture in which we live.

I once saw a bumper sticker that said, "God Created Alcohol So The Irish Wouldn't Conquer The World," and later realized that was an accurate reflection of the impact culture has on our drinking behavior. Many Irish men raise pint after pint with a group of their mates at the pub, because that is integral to their culture. And in this country, if you closed your eyes while speaking to some people in their 30's and 40's, you'd think you were talking to a 19-year-old. They still call each other during the week to plan Happy Hour on Friday, a lake party on Saturday, and a beer-and-chips football gathering on Sunday. As a result, they normalize each other's drinking behavior.

And the greatest difficulty is that it's not the elbow or kneecap that becomes addicted, but the brain. The very organ that likes alcohol is making the decision on whether to change the behavior. Guess what it will always decide? That's why The Thinking Person's Guide to Sobriety advises, "Your Mind Is Like A Bad Neighborhood: Never Go In There By Yourself."

Many women now drink like the guys, not realizing that their bodies are more sensitive to alcohol. And when they become more intoxicated, some naturally blame their smaller size. But if you selected a woman and man of equal weight, say 125 pounds, and gave them both the same amount to drink, do you know who would be more intoxicated? The woman. Do you know by how much? Her blood-alcohol level peaks 40% higher than the guy's. That has terrible implications not only for her behavior, but women averaging just two drinks a day have a 50-100% increase in the incidence of breast cancer.

We forget that alcohol is a toxin that is so harmful that 1 of every 3 addicted people dies of a heart attack. Half die of either heart disease or cancer. Average age of death: Fifty-two. By contrast, liver disease kills only 2%. Because I like irony, I'll read the newspaper when a prominent person dies of a heart attack at age 45 to see if the family says, "Joe just loved life," or friends remark, "Jane lived life to its fullest."

Many of us have poisoned ourselves striving to have fun. And don't get me wrong: I still want to have a good time. After I'd been sober a year, I promised my support group that if life was not as much fun sober, I would go back to drinking. But when one of my old drinking buddies later offered to take me to "retox," I declined because life was good--and promising to get better. Through the lives of sober friends, I could see dreams becoming reality. In fact, if you are performing at 80% of your capacity and life is going fairly well, but your dreams are unfulfilled, why not function at 100% and have your fondest dreams in life come true? One of my dreams was to stop practicing law, and I could never figure out how to do that while I was drinking. Now my greatest fear if I ever start drinking again isn't that I'll end up on a sidewalk or in jail, but in a law office; and the secretary will come in and say, "Mr. Pluymen, your next client is in the waiting room." I'll think, Damn, when did I start drinking again?

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  • PublisherSt. Martin's Griffin
  • Publication date2000
  • ISBN 10 0312254288
  • ISBN 13 9780312254285
  • BindingPaperback
  • Edition number1
  • Number of pages256
  • Rating

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