Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: A Practical Guide for Improving Communication and Getting What You Want in Your Relationships - Hardcover

Gray, John

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 006016848X ISBN 13: 9780060168483

Publisher: HarperCollins, 1993

Synopsis

The Phenomenal #1 New York Times Bestseller

In his classic guide to understanding the opposite sex, Dr. John Gray, provides a practical and proven way for men and women to improve their communication and relationships by acknowledging the fundamental gender differences between them.

Once upon a time Martians and Venusians met, fell in love, and had happy relationships together because they respected and accepted their differences. Then they came to Earth and amnesia set in: they forgot they were from different planets.

Based on years of successful counseling of couples and individuals, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus has helped millions of couples transform their relationships. Now viewed as a modern classic, this timeless book has helped men and women realize how different they can be in their communication styles, their emotional needs, and their modes of behavior, and offers the secrets of communicating without conflicts, allowing couples to give intimacy every chance to grow. 

In this essential guide to understanding your partner, you’ll discover:

• Conflict-Free Communication: Learn why men offer solutions when women just want to feel heard, and how to finally express your needs without starting an argument.
• Different Coping Mechanisms: Understand why men retreat to their “caves” under stress and how giving him space can make him spring back with more love and attention.
• Core Emotional Needs: Discover the six primary love needs of women (like caring and understanding) versus men (like trust and acceptance)―and why giving what you want to receive often fails.
• How to Score Points: See why for a woman, a single rose can mean as much as a vacation, and learn the little things that make a huge difference in keeping the love tank full.

About this title

About the Author

John Gray, Ph.D., is one of the world’s leading relationship experts, and an authority on improving communication styles for couples, companies, and communities. His many books have sold more than fifty million copies in fifty different languages worldwide. John lives with his wife and children in northern California.

From the Back Cover

Popular marriage counselor and seminar leader John Gray provides a unique, practical and proven way for men and women to communicate and relate better by acknowledging the differences between them.

Once upon a time Martians and Venusians met, fell in love, and had happy relationships together because they respected and accepted their differences. Then they came to earth and amnesia set in: they forgot they were from different planets.

Using this metaphor to illustrate the commonly occurring conflicts between men and women, Gray explains how these differences can come between the sexes and prohibit mutually fulfilling loving relationships. Based on years of successful counseling of couples, he gives advice on how to counteract these differences in communication styles, emotional needs and modes of behavior to promote a greater understanding between individual partners. Gray shows how men and women react differently in conversation and how their relationships are affected by male intimacy cycles ("get close", "back off"), and female self-esteem fluctuations ("I'm okay", "I'm not okay"). He encourages readers to accept the other gender's particular way of expressing love, and helps men and women learn how to fulfill each other's emotional needs.

With practical suggestions on how to reduce conflict, crucial information on how to interpret a partner's behavior and methods for preventing emotional "trash from the past" from invading new relationships, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus is a valuable tool for couples who want to develop deeper and more satisfying relationships with their partners.

Reviews

Psychotherapist Gray ( What You Feel You Can Heal ) adds to the growing number of self-help books that assess marital and relationship problems in terms of distinct and pervasive gender differences. Unfortunately, his overuse of gimmicky, often silly analogies and metaphors makes his otherwise down-to-earth guide hard to take seriously. Here Martians (men) play Mr. Fix-It while Venusians (women) run the Home-Improvement Committee; when upset, Martians "go to their caves" (to sort things out alone) while Venusians "go to the well" (for emotional cleansing). While graphically illustrative, the hyperbolic, overextended comparisons, particularly in the chapters that refer to men as rubber bands and women as waves, significantly detract from Gray's realistic insights.
Copyright 1992 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Couples counselor Gray addresses the topic of male-female relationships with humor, insight, and understanding. Author of What You Feel , You Can Heal (Heart Pub., 1989), he offers practical advice on understanding the opposite sex and achieving satisfactory relationships. He argues that we must accept the fact that men and women have different values, communication styles, and intimate needs, then offers practical tips on avoiding painful arguments, asking for support, and communicating during difficult times. His "Venusian/Martian" phrase dictionary lists statements made by men and women and the ways in which they are often misinterpreted. Written in a light tone that keeps the reader's interest, this is a very helpful source for couples trying to keep love alive. Recommended for self-help and therapy collections.
- Demetria A. Harvin, "Hospital Medicine," New York
Copyright 1992 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Edition details

• Publisher: HarperCollins
• Publication date: 1993
• Language: English
• ISBN 10: 006016848X
• ISBN 13: 9780060168483
• Binding: Hardcover
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 304