Choice Theory: A New Psychology of Personal Freedom

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9780060191092: Choice Theory: A New Psychology of Personal Freedom

In his most important book since the bestselling Reality Therapy, Dr. William Glasser continues his break with traditional psychology. He offers a new psychology that, if practiced, could reverse our widespread inability to get along with one another, an inability that is the source of almost all unhappiness.

Take an honest look at your life, and you will see no evidence that your children will have happier marriages; that you and they will get along better; or that they will do better in school or at work than you, your parents or your grandparents. Dr. Glasser claims that, lacking good relationships, more and more people choose mental illness, psychosomatic disease, drug abuse, senseless violence and sex without any thought of love.

For progress in human relationships, he explains that we must give up the punishing, relationship-destroying external control psychology that is by far the dominant one in the world. For example, if you are in an unhappy relationship right now, your unhappiness is caused by one or both of you using external control psychology on the other.

But he goes further. If, for example, you are depressed, your misery is always related to a current unsatisfying relationship. Contrary to what you may believe, your troubles are always now, never in the past. No one can change what happened yesterday.

In one of this century's most significant books on psychology, Dr. Glasser offers choice theory, a non-controlling psychology that gives us the freedom to sustain the relationships that lead to healthy, productive lives. Through clear, vivid language and numerous examples, he makes this vital new psychology come alive. Learning it could change your life.

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Review:

Southern California psychiatrist William Glasser, the author of Reality Therapy, believes that almost all human misery is caused by people trying to control others. In fact, he says, the only behavior we can control is our own; by the same token, no one can make us do anything we don't want to. It's only when we give up spending our energy trying to force others to conform to our ideas or to keep them from doing the same to us that we are able to live the way we want to. Glasser makes this somewhat difficult material easier to understand with examples and case studies from his own practice. For instance, he tells a man whose wife has left him that his only choices are to change what he wants her to do or to change the way he is dealing with her. While doing these things will not necessarily bring his wife back, Glasser says, it will certainly make him feel better. "When we actually begin to realize that we can control only our own behavior, we immediately start to redefine our personal freedom and find, in many instances, that we have much more freedom than we realize," Glasser writes.

From the Back Cover:

In "Choice Theory," Dr. William Glasser offers readers a new and far more effective way to get along with the people in our lives. He explains convincingly that, barring severe poverty or untreatable illness, unsatisfying or disconnecting relationships are the source of almost all crime, addiction, and mental illness, as well as marital, family, and school failure. For progress in human relationships, he explains that we must give up the punishing, relationship-destroying external control psychology that is by far the dominant one in the world. in one of this century's most significant books on psychology, Dr. Glasser offers us choice theory, a noncontrolling psychology that gives us freedom to sustain the relationships that lead to healthy, productive lives.

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