Mars and Venus Starting Over: A Practical Guide for Finding Love Again After a Painful Breakup, Divorce, or the Loss of a Loved One

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9780060933036: Mars and Venus Starting Over: A Practical Guide for Finding Love Again After a Painful Breakup, Divorce, or the Loss of a Loved One

There is hope! You will find love again...

John Gray has helped millions of men and women develop better relationships with his phenomenal New York Times bestseller Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus.

Now he turns his attention to the millions of people who find themselves single again and compassionately presents a process for healing a broken heart. Here are just some of the issues and challenges John Gray covers in this supportive and practical guide to becoming whole again:

  • Emotional Lag Time

  • Grieving the Loss of Love

  • Getting Unstuck

  • Good Endings Make Good Beginnings

  • Saying Good-bye with Love

  • Processing Our Hot Spots

  • 101 Ways to Heal Our Hearts

Starting Over on Venus

  • Glorifying Our Past

  • Over-Romanticizing

  • Focusing on the Negative

  • Who Needs a Man?

  • Women Who Do Too Much

  • Fear of Intimacy

  • My Children Need Me

  • All or Nothing

Starting Over on Mars

  • Work, Money, and Love

  • Positive Addictions

  • We Don't Have to Stop Loving

  • Soul Mates Are Not Perfect

  • Can't Live With Them and Can't Live Without Them

  • HoldingBack

  • Bigger Is Better

  • Self-Destructive Tendencies

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A breakup, divorce, or loss of a loved one isn't just the end of your relationship with that person. It's a continuation of every feeling of abandonment you've ever suffered. It's the loss of a system of approval you'd come to depend on. The struggle, as Gray points out in Starting Over, isn't just to find a new partner, but to get over those feelings of abandonment or loss or anger or whatever else gets dredged up by the end of a relationship.

Perhaps the book's most crucial chapter posits that the best way to get over the loss of love is to focus on the "love" more than the "loss." That may seem impossible, especially if the bum took off with your best friend, your life savings, and your Lyle Lovett CDs, but Gray didn't get to be a household name because the advice in his Venus and Mars books doesn't work. Remembering only the bad parts, Gray says, leaves you with an important part of your emotional being closed to new business.

As for the Venus and Mars stuff, that comes in the second half of the book, when Gray looks at how men and women start new relationships from different points of view, with different priorities (a man might want to have fun with no strings attached; a woman might carry with her a lengthy list of requirements for her next partner, a list that excludes virtually all available men).

If you've never read Gray's work before, you have to be prepared to check your cynicism at the door. This is earnest stuff, but it's also based on decades of experience counseling clients. He's not one of those photogenic, nine-times-divorced shrinklets who's telling you how to conduct your relationships without any real clue of what makes love last. This is the real package: nothing glib, nothing quick and easy, nothing you could've figured out from a "Love Is..." cartoon.

About the Author:

John Gray, Ph.D., an internationally recognized expert in the fields of communication and relationships, and the author of twelve bestsellers, has been conducting personal-growth seminars for thirty years. He is a Certified Family Therapist (National Academy for Certified Family Therapists), a consulting editor of the Family Journal, a member of the Distinguished Advisory Board of the international Association of Marriage and Family Counselors, and a member of the American Counseling Association. John lives with his wife and three children in Northern California.

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John Gray
Published by Harper (1999)
ISBN 10: 0060933038 ISBN 13: 9780060933036
New Paperback Quantity Available: 1

Book Description Harper, 1999. Paperback. Book Condition: New. Bookseller Inventory # DADAX0060933038

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