Kinky Friedman's Guide to Texas Etiquette: Or How to Get to Heaven or Hell Without Going Through Dallas-Fort Worth

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9780060935351: Kinky Friedman's Guide to Texas Etiquette: Or How to Get to Heaven or Hell Without Going Through Dallas-Fort Worth
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Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit! Delivering belly laughs, hee-haws, and downright slackjaw amazement, this hilarious guide to the homeland of George W. and Willie Nelson is the essential how-to for surviving in the Lone Star State. From strange Texas laws and the history of Dr. Pepper to "Texas Talk" (in which a "turd floater" is a heavy downpour) and final-meal requests by death row inmates, Kinky Friedman, "the oldest living Jew in Texas who doesn't own any real estate," provides an insider's guide that will be loved by native Texans and the rest of us poor devils alike.

Even if you don't know the difference between an Aggie and an armadillo -- or what's really in the back on Willie Nelson's tour bus -- you can pass for a Texan with the Kinkster's expert coaching. So grab your hairspray and the keys to the Cadillac and get reading!

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About the Author:

Kinky Friedman is an author, musician, defender of strays, cigar smoker, and the governor of the heart of Texas.

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The commander-in-chief has called Friedman "a Texas legend," but the Kinkster hardly mentions GW a-tall, filling these pages instead with "Things You Would Never Hear a Real Texan Say" ("I'll have a decaf latte, please") and "The Texas Celebrity High School Football Hall of Fame," which reminds us that Tommy Lee Jones was guard for the Saint Mark's School of Texas Lions in Dallas. The Kinkster includes an invaluable glossary, "Texas Talk" (e.g., "'turd floater'--a very heavy downpour"); waxes poetic about the Alamo, the Yellow Rose, and Luckenbach; cracks wise about the weather, Aggies (Texas A & M students and alums), and armadillos; and quotes Willie Nelson, the Zen Texan featured in Friedman's 1997 mystery, Road Kill: "If you ain't crazy, there's something wrong with you." Interspersed with all the Texas ephemera are articles Friedman published first in such magazines as Rolling Stone and High Times, on topics ranging from the roots of Texas rock 'n' roll to the late Ace Reid, "the world's greatest cowboy cartoonist." Benjamin Segedin
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

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