Declare Yourself: Discovering the Me in Relationships (Spectrum Book)

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9780131975828: Declare Yourself: Discovering the Me in Relationships (Spectrum Book)

This title has been revised and reprint under the new title Relating Redefined: Discovering the New "Language" for Communicating (ISBN 1879797011).

"synopsis" may belong to another edition of this title.

From the Author:

This book about communicating, personal responsibility, freedom and self-management in interpersonal relationships is a revised and retitled edition of the book published by Prentice-Hall from 1975 to 1991 in sixteen printings under the title Declare Yourself. It challenges many currently held psychological and philosophical concepts. Among the issues raised:

Are people really as helpless as many helpers want them to believe?

Are all those inadequate behaviors really illnesses to be treated and then paid for by medical insurance? Isn't it interesting that only the gamblers who lose seem to be the ones diagnosed as ill?

Is there any personal behavior that can't be characterized as having been caused by something outside ourselves? Perhaps, sometimes, it is our fault!

Should we try behaviors rather than motives in the courtroom, and only then consider circumstances?

How much personal responsibility can individuals be relieved of before the concept of "a nation of laws" crumbles?

What are the myths of feelings? How are feelings used to control others?

What is the alternative to being responsible for other's feelings?

While becoming as one in a relationship seems universally desired, isn't the perennial question still-which one?

How do people get their way with others?

Is our behavior pushed (motive) or pulled (purpose)? It does make a significant difference in how we see and react to the world.

This little book about people challenges the reader to consider alternative ways to view him/herself in the realm of interpersonal relationships. There is a little theory and a great deal of practical illustration.

From the Back Cover:

What others say.

"If you liked Scott Peck's The Road Less Traveled, here's the how-to book for Scott's problem-solving model. Relating Redefined helped me to become more responsible when communicating and taught me to clearly say what I want when solving problems with others...A clear straightforward way for couples to communicate. My wife and I give a copy to every couple we sponsor." (A.Tom Perry, Church discussion leader for the Road Less Traveled, and Sponsor for Engaged Couples, Texas)

"...has been the basis of my professional work and my own personal strategy of living since 1977 when I first bought a copy of this book's original edition. I gave a copy to a couple who came in for the first time to work on their marital problems. I never saw them again, but I did receive a phone call the next week letting me know they both read the book and were actively working on their problems more effectively than ever and didn't need to continue with me. I count this as a professional success. The book is deceptive-it is readable by seventh graders, yet it contains ideas that strike at the core of the issues surrounding mental health and illness." (Lawrence Hall, Psychiatric Social Worker, Michigan)

"...I have strongly suggested that anyone I work with closely for any prolonged period take the time to read your book-then act like it! The result has always been more productive people-people who now talk in terms of what they want to happen, instead of the typically manipulative and demoralizing communication habits they grew up with.." (Bob Brueck, Organization Development Consultant, Texas)

"I am a junior high assistant principal in a school consisting of grades 7,8 and 9 with an enrollment of about 1200 students. One of my major responsibilities is to deal with crisis intervention, disciplining students and working with interpersonal relations. I have found by using your method of dealing with behaviors...my effectiveness has been improved and the number of students I could deal with in a given time has increased." (O. Keith Tucker, Carson Junior High, Arizona)

"We used Narciso's concepts in a better management series for one of our large business groups. In a six months later post-mortem, his segment brought the most positive and widely remembered response. And the reason: Partiipants found applicability of these concepts not only at work, but in a variety of away-from-work settings as well." (Arthur N. Brown, Director, Executive Development General Mills, Inc. (ret.))

"About this title" may belong to another edition of this title.

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