The Love Relationship Formula: Predicting Romantic Success with Astrology

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9780738704241: The Love Relationship Formula: Predicting Romantic Success with Astrology
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Includes Free Astrology Software!

A no-fail way to predict your cosmic chemistry and odds for lasting love. What elements do all successful relationships have in common? For eighteen years, Rakela has studied the consistent signifiers of ideal love connections. Now she shares her unique formula to finding and maintaining lasting romantic happiness. The formula consists of fifteen planetary combinations that reflect the perfect relationship. The more combinations you have, the better off you and your partner will be.

Learn about:
- planetary pairings for doom or bloom
- indicators for karmic relationship patterns
- best times and places to meet your soul mate.

With this guidebook and CD set, you can generate comprehensive, insightful astrological reports quickly and easily, while learning the essentials of astrology at your own pace. The CD included with this book is PC-compatible and was developed by Cosmic Patterns, a leading developer of astrological software.

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About the Author:

Christine Rakela (New York) is a full-time professional astrologer. She has been featured on Fox News and the A&E network’s “Astrology Unexplained Special.” For seventeen years she has produced and hosted the television program “Astrology Connections” on Manhattan Neighborhood Network.

Excerpt. Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.:

Part I
The
Journey
to Love
1
Understanding
the Love Relationship Formula
We are all looking for the “right” relationship-the one that works! Timing, fate, and
your astrological connections have everything to do with it. For a relationship to really
prosper, however, both parties must have some sense of stability in their lives, have no
other involvements, and have a desire for each another, as well as a desire to make it
work. But what signifies a good, lasting relationship? Have you ever wondered if there
is some kind of secret to having a great relationship? Well, there is.
What if we could come up with a formula that could lead to the “perfect” relationship
-one that truly satisfies the needs and desires of the two people involved? Now
you have the opportunity to benefit from the Love Relationship Formula, which has all
of the right ingredients for the relationship you are looking for and more. So often we
think we know what we want, but then we are disappointed in our romantic encounters.
Why? Because the Love Relationship Formula is incomplete. Once you understand
what the formula is, you will attract and maintain a winning relationship. The Love Relationship
Formula is actually a reflection of your finest self.
One of the most important findings is that the Love Relationship Formula is consistent
in relationship after relationship. Since the formula is based on the mathematical
angles used in astrology, with a specific composition of planets, if a (cosmic) mathematical
pattern is consistent, it cannot be denied. Why? Because math is a form of perfection.
Therefore, it is possible for a relationship formula to exist that is based on math for
precision, yet fluctuates to the needs, desires, ideas, and emotions of being human.
But what makes the Love Relationship Formula even more valid is that you will find
the formula not only in a couple's synastry, but also in first meeting charts, marriage
charts, and composite charts of long-term unions, and even in the solar and lunar return
charts. The consistency of the Love Relationship Formula is what validates its credibility
and love potential for all.
Before we explore the world of synastry and understand our Love Relationship Formula
in its entirety, we must first discuss relationship challenges. What emotional
blocks are keeping us from a lasting love? In this process we will learn what works,
what doesn't, and why. The next few pages will allow you to release emotional blocks,
get back in touch with your feelings, understand love, and confront your relationship
beliefs that may be inhibiting you from finding true love. Once we rid ourselves of all
this relationship baggage, we may enjoy the Love Relationship Formula to its fullest.
Without getting into any astrological specifics, here are four questions to ask yourself.
1. Do you communicate well with your partner, or is only one of you calling the
shots?
2. Does your partner meet your needs, or are you constantly meeting his or her
needs, and thus your needs are neglected? (We will talk about your desires later.)
3. Do you feel secure and comfortable with your partner, or do you need to control
or monitor him or her?
4. Are you pulling all the weight in the relationship emotionally, physically, and financially,
or are the responsibilities equally divided?
However you answered these questions, now we will find out why.
In relationships, good communication is of prime importance. Mental needs are just
as important as physical needs, and must be fulfilled. You have to be able to express
your feelings and opinions with your partner, and if a disagreement is in order, then
fine. A client once stated to me how she was so afraid to express herself, because otherwise,
she thought, her spouse might leave her. With his Saturn (restriction) in adverse
aspect to her Mercury (communication) and her Venus (affection, self-esteem), I could
understand why. However, if she did not face up to this challenge, her self-esteem
would continue to diminish and he would eventually leave or neglect her because she
didn't think she was worthy enough to express how she felt. Yes, he might leave her,
but he might also stay and give her the respect that she deserves, because she thought
enough of herself to speak her mind. This challenge, of course, was not an accident. It
came into her life to transcend her low self-esteem, fear of rejection, and need for approval
to validate her existence. Once she confronted this episode in her life, either her
significant other would change, or she would attract a more supportive relationship.
Expressing how you feel, talking issues out-these are musts. If you find yourself in a
relationship where you are experiencing verbal repression, than you need to seriously
reevaluate your relationship, for one thing is for sure-you are not happy. Why? Because
you can't be yourself.

2
What Challenges
our Relationships

Needs Versus Desires
We all have desires. But desires are short-lived and needs must be met. Forget about what
you want or what you think you should have-stop twisting God's arm! Concern yourself
with your needs, because otherwise you will never be fulfilled. How often is it that
we go running after our desires? Yes, the grass always looks greener on the other side-
but is it? When you get what you want, but not what you need, the longing within continues.
What we desire is fulfillment, not greed.
Thanks in part to the media, it almost seems to be easier to go after our selfish desires
then deal with our needs, which furthers sexual promiscuity, unwanted pregnancies,
co-dependent relationships, and fatal attractions. What we really want is long-term
gratification. It is something that we all yearn for in life and it comes through a deep,
meaningful union with another. This happens when we recognize our needs through
the Love Relationship Formula.
It's not always easy to get in touch with our needs, and sometimes we are surprised
by our discoveries. Why? Perhaps they are not in line with our “ideal” relationship, the
one that our parents, grandparents, and, worse yet, society has programmed into our
heads-that image of how it is “supposed to be.” Remember, the whole idea behind relationships
is that they are an illusion, like ornaments on a Christmas tree. It's romanticism
-it's happy connotations of what life can be like with someone. This is not real.
There is no such thing as an ideal relationship. The ideal is what we may strive for, but
it should not rule over or confine us in any way. The ideal relationship does not exist in
dense reality; it can only be found in God.
In The Divine Romance by Paramahansa Yogananda, he writes about how we seek that
special union with another human being, but what our soul is really looking for is union
with our divine selves. We should never lose sight of this fact, for in doing so we give our
power away to another. In seeking the divine romance, looking outside of ourselves for
love is a very unfulfilling experience. It's like setting ourselves up for a disappointment.
Sometimes we have to come to terms with the fact that we may be madly in love
with someone, but they may not be the right person for us. Why? Usually it's because
our needs are not being met. If we neglect our needs, we are neglecting ourselves. When we
find ourselves attending to someone else's needs and loving too much, we are probably
neglecting our own needs.
Giving your power away to another leaves you with nothing, and eventually they leave you
too.
For you end up giving away the very thing your lover was attracted to in the beginning
of your relationship. You feel that if you shower them with love and attention, then
they will not abandon you. But what is happening is that you end up abandoning yourself
in the process. Givers always attract takers, and taking advantage of someone, controlling
someone in a relationship, is not love. In any relationship, we give to a point, but
we also need to learn when to cut off our efforts and let the other person help themselves,
so we in turn can help ourselves if necessary. The strength of a relationship depends
on the two people involved. Both must be able to stand alone, yet stand together.
The Love Relationship
Formula encourages you to get in touch with your higher self and your needs.

The “Fix”-Ignoring Relationship Issues
We are prone to ignoring relationship issues. Even though we don't intend to repeat this
mistake, at times we do. Looking for ways to escape, we continually distract ourselves
from the truth. The problem stems from the fact that we are constantly looking for the
“fix” instead of looking for a way to reunite with our divine selves. The “fix” never allows
us to arrive at the point of relationship realization.
Awakening from this delusive state, we
can then truly unite with another. Remember that romance is a delusive state of mind.
To bring romance into an awakened state, we can begin to create a positive romantic
ideal. I often hear, “All I need is the right person, Mr. or Ms. Right, and then everything
will fall into place.” It's time to take off those rose-colored specs and start dealing with
your issues, for the work really begins with you. So much of my own personal discovery
and transformation was learning about myself through my own astrology chart and
struggling to change the adversity. It's called “turning squares into trines,” and you can
achieve this much easier than an alchemist turning base metals into gold.

What Are Your Beliefs?
As you strive to become a better person, you will attract a better partner-one in line
with who you really are. For in life we attract what we are. I had a hard time recognizing
that like attracts like when I attracted someone into my life who I felt exemplified
qualities or behaviors that where unlike me. After much soul-searching, I came to realize
that a certain thought/belief system pulled these emotionally unsettled individuals
my way. I finally concluded that yes, thoughts are things, and their importance is not to
be underestimated. For our thoughts are more powerful than we realize. So be careful
of what you are thinking, because it may come true for you!
Getting control over your thoughts is easier said than done. You can become very
comfortable being angry with someone, or feeling life is out to get you, or that life is unfair.
This will not help your situation. What will improve your circumstances is working
on yourself to change the old pattern. You may need to find healthy ways to release
the tensions, resentments, or anger, and how you deal with it will lead to your success
or failure. The choice is yours.

Timing
Timing has everything to do with securing a relationship. When our timing is off, one
or both parties are unavailable on some level: emotionally, physically, psychologically,
spiritually, or financially. You will not find security in someone who is unavailable or
prefers a love affair or third-party relationship. Both can be highly regrettable, especially
the triangle. I have seen women wait for years, as he tells her he's going to leave his wife
someday. In most cases, he never will, for the pattern is set.
Going from one relationship to the next can also burn you out. The only way to recuperate
is to be with yourself. Celibacy is not a curse! It is a time to get your act together on
the emotional front. The more you are with yourself, the more time you have to check in
to your own issues-to change. The dating merry-go-round of attracting individuals who
are not right for you is a reflection of something in yourself. But you will continue to attract
what is in your life blueprint until you transcend it.
Part of the healing process is dealing with your issues and not being distracted by another
relationship. Although romance sounds nice, it doesn't usually solve your dilemmas.
However, there are some rare cases where someone you meet is a part of that healing
process. But don't count on this. For after a recent breakup, one tends to be vulnerable
and hurting, and therefore needs to take time to heal the wound. If you look for someone
to do that for you, you might well become prey to someone else's vindictive tendencies,
and the cycle continues.
Space between relationships can be a very important time and can be just as significant
as the time spent in a relationship with someone. Hopefully, we take what we have
learned into our next relationship. For as the saying goes, if you don't learn from your
mistakes, you are destined to repeat them until you do. There is nothing worse than
going through the same painful experience a second time around. The more you work
out your issues alone, the less you will have to work them out in a relationship. The idea
is to enjoy your relationship.
Besides the timing and the cosmic connections, to have a relationship succeed you
must feel you are worthy of love and a wonderful relationship. If you take a good look
at yourself, you may find that you are too critical of yourself and maybe of others too,
thus making it difficult for anyone to get close to you. Or perhaps you are always trying
to meet with someone else's approval or are living someone else's life.
You must feel good about yourself. Otherwise you will not feel happiness with another.
Don't expect that you can depend upon another person for your happiness. No
one is required to provide this joy for you. Being an adult is being responsible for your
own happiness. The Love Relationship Formula allows your personal happiness to thrive
as you incorporate timely choices.

Control and Denial
There are two kinds of emotion in life: love and fear. When fear dictates, we deprive
ourselves of love and happiness. In this instance love is a one-way street, for people
who do not fully love themselves attract partners who exemplify those same feelings.
This can also be said for the emotionally detached and noncommittal individuals who
attract people who are already spoken for, or unavailable. This only further promotes a
fear of love and intimacy. Sabotaging ourselves keeps us from what we want. These are
conditioned patterns that must be addressed, for what one tends to attract in this state
is essentially an abusive relationship in either a verbal, physical, psychological, or emotional
manner, sometimes all of the above. What we do for love!
At times, due to karmic retribution, we find ourselves in an abusive relationship. If
we are not able to work things out, hopefully we learn not to tolerate this kind of treatment
-that we deserve better. Ridding yourself of anyone who negates your self-esteem
will signify that you do not accept this behavior. Therefore, you are less likely to attract
this detrimental conduct into your life again. Once you take action, your life will
change for the better. Don't think that you can wave a magic wand and change a person.
Wouldn't life be so great if that were possible! But how a person sees you can rarely
be changed, especially if they want to have a certain control over you, which is due to
their own selfishnes...

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