Awkward Moments Children's Bible, Vol. 1

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9781492177449: Awkward Moments Children's Bible, Vol. 1

How well do you know the Good Book? Written by a retired ministry leader, this book combines actual Bible verses with more than 30 whimsical original illustrations and commentaries to encourage readers (from all walks of faith) to think about how the Bible shapes our culture as Christianity continues to evolve. What began as a private online gag among interfaith friends quickly grew into a #1 Amazon Bestseller on its first day of sales - enjoyed by fundamentalist Christians and militant atheists alike!

BEWARE - NOT FOR KIDS! This is definitely not your average children's Bible! If you thought the bestselling parody "Go The F**k To Sleep" was inappropriate for story-time with kids, you haven't seen anything yet! Leave it to the Bible! However, this book is not a satire, but a real look into some of the more troubling passages from both the Old Testament and the New Testament - including the words and teachings of Jesus Christ, himself!

  • Unicorn Murders
  • Genocidal Behavior
  • Foreskins Fetishes
  • Boiled Babies
  • Missing Messiah
  • Selling Daughters
  • Cannibalism Club
  • Genetic Breakthroughs
  • Demonic Bacon
  • Gagged Women
  • Jihad Jesus
  • Historical manipulation of the Bible
  • And much more!

Let's be honest - there are some things in the Good Book that are just... awkward! There are verses we'd like to forget or that have been changed throughout the centuries. There are many verses you've never heard before in church, let alone seen in your average children's Bible! Not to mention the verses that have been added over the centuries! The Awkward Moments Children's Bible is much more than an irreverent book for your coffee table! Christian readers, agnostics and atheists will find themselves laughing out loud while being encouraged to think about the Bible and Christianity in a new way.

Most people were raised in the religion chosen by their family. Young children learn a few Bible stories taken out of context and accept them without question. (On what basis could they possibly question their parents or church leaders?) After decades of repetition and tradition, it's understandable how we might put our beliefs on auto-pilot and just nod as a pastor repeats bizarre stories that are already familiar to us. It's no wonder that recent studies show an incredible lack of Biblical knowledge among Christians - 55% unable to even name the four Gospels of the New Testament - the very foundation of Christianity!

This book takes a much different tone than other authors who are critical of the Bible and Christianity. It is not as academic or dry as Bart Ehrman or Richard Carrier. It is not as arrogant or condescending as some find Richard Dawkins or Christopher Hitchens or as blustery as many accuse Sam Harris or Daniel Dennett. Instead, Horus Gilgamesh takes the approach, "Let's assume that it's all true and work backwards from there." In doing so, the author directly challenges many of today's Christian leaders from Joel Osteen and Pat Robertson to Joyce Meyer and Ken Ham. This book is as much a critique on the evolution of Christian culture as it is about the history of the Bible.

The goal of this mock Children's book is not to do mock a reader's faith, but to encourage critical thinking! Awkward Moments (Not Found In Your Average) Children's Bible encourages readers to really understand what is in their Bibles and think for themselves about the context of Biblical teaching. The book will hopefully challenge Christian readers to reflect on how religion continues to shape the lives and culture of future generations. If readers happen to laugh out loud and enjoy the interactive puzzles and games in the mean time - it's just an added bonus!

"synopsis" may belong to another edition of this title.

About the Author:

HORUS GILGAMESH was raised Catholic before being "born again" in college when he began following a calling toward full-time ministry. Early on, his efforts were focused on youth evangelism and Biblical literacy around the world. When he was on a missions trip to Africa, a fearless young boy approached, pleading, "Chakula? Maji?"- the Swahili words for "food" and "water." Unfortunately, Horus had no food or water to offer the poor child - only Bibles. A few days later, Horus met a humanitarian relief worker from Spain who shared five simple words of wisdom that would change his life forever - "Empty stomachs have no ears." Horus realized that he was not meeting the very real needs of the people he was hoping to help - he was struggling to finding a purpose in his own life, as a self righteous servant of his Creator. To many Christians, the most important gift you could ever give to a man is a chance at eternal life through the Gospel of Jesus Christ - the Living Water. But what about this life? There are billions who would give anything for a drink of regular old H2O.

Review:

"Simply incredible. The book features beautiful/disturbing illustrations of Bible passages that no Christians want to admit are in their holy book. If you have to read a Bible, this is the one to read. It's the equivalent of learning a new language and immediately looking up all the curse words." - Hemant Meta, The Friendly Atheist

"Sign me up for volume 2 and every other volume that ever comes out." - The American Jesus

"Just like the Bible,  this book isn't actually suitable for children. But it is a funny look at ugly and absurd verses that Christians typically just gloss over or ignore." - Brain Hulk


"It might take reading books like this one to jolt some Christians to the actual reading of some of the "awkward moments" of the Bible shown. [This book] helps Christians to awaken to being able to critically think and respond to the [Bible verses] raised up." - Dan Kimball, pastor and author

"[The book] has proved successful at garnering the attention of Christians, many of whom were initially outraged at the Awkward Bible's depiction of the Bible and Christ. But many atheists and Christians stayed on the site and ultimately began having conversations with one another." - The Christian Post

"Entertaining and thought-provoking for Christians and non-Christians alike! Awkward Moments uses humor as an important educational tool, challenging believers and non-believers alike to really think about the Bible's contents and historical context. The book encourages readers to dig deeper into their Bibles while simultaneously making them wish they hadn't. This is much more than an irreverent gag gift - it tackles the age-old problem of Biblical ignorance in a surprisingly powerful way!" - David G. McAfee, author of "Mom, Dad, I'm an Atheist: The Guide to Coming Out as a Non-believer"

"NOT FOR KIDS! The illustrations are vibrant and full of life,  mimicking that of the most revered children's books - at times tricking readers to not notice the real subtext of the image and verse. As a result,  readers may miss the subtle nuance and innuendo hidden in the images at first glance. It is the commentaries that are included with each passage that will unveil the purpose of the illustrations and challenge many readers,  bringing to light many ideas and facts that may trouble the average Christian" - Broadway World

"About this title" may belong to another edition of this title.

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