But I Didn't Mean That!: How to Avoid Misunderstandings And Hurt Feelings in Everyday Life

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9781572244887: But I Didn't Mean That!: How to Avoid Misunderstandings And Hurt Feelings in Everyday Life
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If you don't do it yourself, you certainly know someone who is forever putting a foot into his or her mouth. This person has raised the tasteless, thoughtless, tactless, or otherwise terrifically awful remark into an art form. If there is a wrong place, a wrong time, or a wrong person to whom to say anything, they're on the spot and on the ready. And though we can joke about it (at the right time, of course), careless speech is no laughing matter. Words really can hurt-not only the person at whom they're aimed but the speaker, too, whose relationship, career, and social prospects can all suffer as a result of unmindful speech.

Fortunately, this book can help even the most scandalous mis-speaker. It outlines six simple questions, called Q-Points (Questions of Positive Thinking and Speaking) for readers to keep in mind before they speak. Who am I speaking to? What am I not seeing? Where will my words get me? How will the other person react to my words? When do I say it? And why must I say it at all? By coming up with an answer in the moment before speaking, anyone can start to avoid terrible slips in speaking judgment that can hurt themselves and others. But I Didn't Mean That! analyzes the most problematic speaking situations to show how the Q-points can be used to start conversing with empathy, confidence, and unimpeachable tact.

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From the Publisher:

If you're tired of forever living with the taste of foot in your mouth, you'll rejoice at finding this smart and snappy collection of tips for learning empathetic communication and, thereby, avoiding the hurt feelings, damaged relationships, and lost opportunities that come from saying the wrong thing at the wrong time.

About the Author:

Richard Heyman, Ed.D, is a specialist in the use of language in everyday life. He is professor of communication and education at the University of Calgary and president of Richard Heyman Associates, a business communications consulting company. He was the founder and director (until 1988) of the Discourse Analysis Research Group, a think tank devoted to researching language and communication, and he has published more than thirty book chapters and articles on his research. He has more than thirty-five years of experience in communications consulting and has presented his work to professionals, academics, and laypeople.

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