Doggone Funny: A Book of Canine Humor

 
9781891210860: Doggone Funny: A Book of Canine Humor
From the Author:

"In one way or another all of these people contributed to the completion of this book, and I would like to thank them: My parents, Martha and Anthony, for having me and believing in me,

My in-laws, Rose and George, for feeding me while I wrote this, The Walls Family, who kept me chuckling through 5 years of carpooling together, And the following people for laughing with me:

John O'Donnell, Randy Vance, Joe Koziel, Eric Deckers, Susan Nason, Midge Pandoli, Flo, Kelly, Greg, and Rob Mason

and all the participants in Cetlink's dachshund chat, whose puppies provided endless motivation for this book, especially Jessica Young and Therese Fuhrman,

and Dilbert's Scott Adams for answering my email questions about the humor field."

-- Sandy Lindsey

Excerpt. Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.:

CANINE COMPUTER DEFINITIONS

UNDO: A feature most dogs wish they had when the master asks, in an ominous tone of voice, "Did you do this?"

SYSTEM ERROR: What happens when a heavily shedding collie falls asleep against the system's cooling fan intake.

USER-FRIENDLY: A watchdog who doesn't repeatedly think that the owner of the house is a burglar.

VIRTUAL REALITY: The mental state a computer user enters after his dog walks across his computer keyboard and crashes his current reality, which took him three months to program, and for which he has no backup.

VERSION: The difference between what the cat says happened and what the dog claims occured in the two minutes it took you to take the trash out back.

SPREADSHEET: What a dog does to his bedding before he lies down on it.

UPGRADE: To exchange a cat for a dog.

VIRUS: What the computer user claims to have when his boss asks for the above erased program.

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