Xenophobe's Guide to the Scots - Softcover

Ross, David

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1906042470 ISBN 13: 9781906042479

Publisher: Oval Books, 2008

Synopsis

Innate instincts

A Scotsman likes to feel that, almost by instinct, he could guddle a trout (palm it out of the water) or gralloch a deer (disembowel it with his knife), even if he spends his day driving a bus or designing software.

 

A kilty cover-up

If the Scots were to shed their seriousness, they would be noisier than the Neapolitans and wilder than the dancing Dervishes. Their reserve is not a defense against the rest of the world: it is a protective cover, like the lid of a nuclear reactor.

 

Rob joy

Calvinism is still deeply ingrained in the Scottish soul. A Scottish poet, overcome by the joy of sunshine and blue sky, once cried out what a fine day it was. The woman to whom he spoke replied, “We'll pay for it, we'll pay for it.”

 

Cunning and clever

The Scots respect cleverness and like to feel that they possess plenty of it themselves. In Scotland there is nothing wrong with being clever, so long as you show it by words or actions, rather than by bragging. You don't have to hide it. To say of someone that “he has a good conceit of himself” is neither praise nor blame, just a statement of fact.

About this title

From the Back Cover

Two adjectives from their own form of the English language haunt the Scots. One is 'pawky', the other is 'dour'. The pawky Scot is a person with a droll grin and a wisecrack to accompany it. The dour Scot is a person with a grim expression, a grim mind, and a grim turn of phrase to accompany it. It is a special Scottish talent to combine both characteristics within the same person.
Xenophobia is an irrational fear of foreigners, probably justified, always understandable.
Xenophobe's Guides - an irreverent look at the beliefs and foibles of nations, almost guaranteed to cure Xenophobia.

About the Author

David Sutherland Ross is a fully fledged member of that well-established species, the Scottish literary exile. Born in Oban, Argyll, he was removed at an early age to his ancestral county of Ross and Cromarty, where he grew up and went to school. Furnished with a little knowledge about all sorts of things thanks to a Scottish education, he migrated to London expecting to become a journalist, but became a publisher instead.

Having learned from blurb-writing how to represent a tangle of ill-assorted elements and random events as a unified whole, he realised he was eminently qualified to write the history of Scotland, and produced Scotland: History of a Nation. Nowadays, as chairman of a small Scottish-based publishing company, he combines publishing with writing and the compilation of anthologies, including Awa¿ and Bile Yer Heid, a collection of Scottish insults and invective. Although he enjoys it all immensely, sometimes he wonders whether it isn¿t too late to try something completely different, like utilising his ability to do water-divining; or perhaps opening a beach restaurant in Bali.

His favourite place in Scotland is the summit of Ben Venue; his favourite Scottish food, new-baked scones with raspberry jam; his favourite Scottish book, The Scottish National Dictionary, and his favourite Scottish phrase, ¿Just a sensation.¿

Edition details

• Publisher: Oval Books
• Publication date: 2008
• Language: English
• ISBN 10: 1906042470
• ISBN 13: 9781906042479
• Binding: Paperback
• Number of pages: 92