Dr. Verne's Northern White Trash Etiquette

Edstrom, Verne

Published by iUniverse
ISBN 10: 1583485422 / ISBN 13: 9781583485422
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Synopsis: “Scathing and irreverent—the book Martha Stewart would have written if she’d grown up in a trailer park near Toledo.”—Andrea Simakis, Cleveland Plain Dealer

“Verne is the anti-Dr. Laura—a refreshing, hilarious, overdue change.”—Nicole Saylor, Wisconsin State Journal This isn’t that wimpy self-help you’ll get from creeps like Deepak Chopra and Stephen Covey. No, Dr. Verne's Northern White Trash Etiquette dispenses practical, common-sense advice for decent working people. You’ll learn the latest theories on:

  • The proper ways to fake a back injury.
  • Preventing your in-laws from stealing the silverware at wedding receptions.
  • Creative ideas for cheating on your husband with that cute guy from the loading dock.
  • Improving your drunk driving skills.
  • Financial planning for scamming out of your gambling debts.
  • How to keep from getting your ass kicked at sports bars in Wisconsin.
  • Plus sound advice on everything from lying to your boss to conducting that first convenience store robbery!

About the Author: Dr. Verne Edstrom Esq. is considered America's leading scholar on Northern White Trash culture. He is a graduate of the Red Wing Boys Reformatory, thought by many to be the Harvard of the Minnesota juvenile corrections system. He later received a scholarship to Stillwater State Penitentiary, where he majored in pipefitting. After graduation, Dr. Verne went on to earn his doctorate from the prestigious Northern White Trash Studies Program at Bemidji State University. As an acclaimed public speaker and consultant, Dr. Verne's services are in great demand. In the Clinton Administration, he served as a special envoy to France and Los Angeles to help those countries become less sissified. He conducts regular seminars on power tool theft for the Gambino Crime Family. And his annual three-day symposium, "How to Sneak Into America, Get Yourself a Disability Scam & Spend the Rest of Your Days Watching Cable & Pounding Grain Belt," was attended by more than 100,000 people in Mexico City last spring. Dr. Verne also sits on the national boards of Yuppies Anonymous, the American Bookies Association and the Save the Manual Transmission Foundation. He presently resides in Des Moines where he serves as a columnist for Cityview.

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Title: Dr. Verne's Northern White Trash Etiquette
Publisher: iUniverse
Binding: PAPERBACK
Book Condition: Very Good

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