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The Nine Fantasies That Will Ruin Your Life And The Eight Realities That Will Save You.

Browne, Dr. Joy.

36 ratings by Goodreads
ISBN 10: 060960354X / ISBN 13: 9780609603543
Published by Crown Publishers, New York, 1998
Used Condition: Good Hardcover
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256 pages. Hardcover with dustjacket. Good condition. SELF-HELP. Here's a proven prescription for freedom from our self-defeating patterns of thought and behavior that allows for real progress toward our goals. In this book, Dr. Browne shows you how to apply simple, powerful ideas to your marriage, personal relationships, career, finances, health, and every other area of your life. (Key Words: Happiness, Dr. Joy Browne, Self-Help, Marriage, Personal Relationships, Career, Finances, Health). Bookseller Inventory # 82883X1

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Bibliographic Details

Title: The Nine Fantasies That Will Ruin Your Life ...

Publisher: Crown Publishers, New York

Publication Date: 1998

Binding: Hardcover

Book Condition:Good

Dust Jacket Condition: Dust Jacket Included

Edition: First Edition..

Book Type: book

About this title

Synopsis:

Every day on her nationally syndicated radio program Dr. Joy Browne gets calls from people looking for sympathy.

They don't get it.

Many of Dr. Joy's nine million listeners--like so many of us--seek the kind of help that only makes us feel good about feeling bad. Dr. Joy believes that we can do better. She knows we can feel good for the best reason of all: because we have gathered the courage and the smarts to say good-bye to the fantasies that perpetuate our problems and shake hands with the realities that give us control of our lives.

Dr. Joy has spent nearly twenty years listening to and advising thousands of women and men about their frustrations and disappointments. She has diagnosed the ways we get in trouble and stay there. In turn, she has a proven prescription for freedom from our self-defeating patterns of thought and behavior that allows for real progress toward our goals. She calls her plan for emotional health The Nine Fantasies That Will Ruin Your Life and the Eight Realities That Will Save You.

What are they?
Among the Fantasies, Dr. Joy includes such harmful but highly touted ideas as:
Somewhere I Have a Soulmate
Winning the Lottery Will Set Me Free
Confession Is Good for the Soul

The Realities are less warm-and-fuzzy but a lot more in tune with the world we live in:
Attitude Is Everything
Go for Short-Term Pain, Long-Term Gain
People Do Things for Reasons

In The Nine Fantasies That Will Ruin Your Life and the Eight Realities That Will Save You, Dr. Joy Browne shows you how to apply these simple, powerful ideas to your marriage, personal relationships, career, finances, health, and every other area of your life.

No matter how difficult or long-standing your problems, Dr. Joy will show you how to become a fearless, focused, and, most important, happy adventurer in your own life. That may sound like a fantasy, but you can make it your new reality.

Dr. Joy on Fantasies
"Look, I know you think fantasies are fun, sexy, and cool, whether your dream is of Cinderella or Prince Charming, or that your love will be passionate, available, rich, gorgeous, and lovable. Everybody indulges in fantasies from time to time, but as a lifestyle choice, we're talking dis-as-ter! Even if these seemingly harmless little devils don't ruin your life, they can cause a lot of avoidable misery. . . . Fantasies are a distraction from the business of running our lives successfully and realistically. I plan to wrestle these pesky critters to the ground so we can all get on with the pleasure of focused thoughts and energy."

Dr. Joy on Realities
"We've become so used to the idea that the real world is dangerous that reality has gotten a really bad reputation. I'm going to show you that reality is a lot less scary than you've been led to believe, and that it is actually potentially helpful, healthy, life-affirming, and the most useful game in town."

Review:

"Fantasies are fun, sexy, and cool," admits popular radio psychologist Dr. Joy Browne, but they are "a distraction from the business of running our lives successfully and realistically." As a lifestyle choice, fantasies spell disaster, ruin, or at least misery. After collecting hundreds, Browne culled the nine ugliest fantasies, such as:

  • "Functional families exist."
  • "Stick to your guns."
  • "Men and women are from different planets."
  • "Somewhere I have a soul mate."
Browne explains the Big Nine, cajoles readers into choosing reality, and answers questions from callers in each chapter. She also includes "Shrink Wraps": additional related fantasies and entertaining tidbits such as "movies that prove my point" and "songs to memorize." After she has dashed our fantasies, she lifts us up with "the eight realities that will save you"--thank goodness!

Browne's warm, friendly, buoyant style leads into important issues safely. But if the gentle approach doesn't work, she nails points with comments like, "You write welcome on your forehead and then you're surprised when he steps on your face," and "It's normal to have pre-wedding cold feet, but don't warm them on the best man's back." If you enjoy Browne on the radio, you'll love this book. --Joan Price

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