Tales of the Truly Grotesque (The Stench of Sulphur Swamp, Book 1)
AbeBooks Seller Since August 14, 2015Quantity Available: 1
AbeBooks Seller Since August 14, 2015Quantity Available: 1
About this Item
Title: Tales of the Truly Grotesque (The Stench of ...
Publisher: Creepy Little Productions
Publication Date: 2005
Book Condition: Good
About this title
Like other legendary milestones of literature that have been stolen, burned, mutilated or buried, it was taken for granted that this infamous book series was lost for eternity. Of course, in the late 1980s, many were convinced that a true and definitive collection of these tales was found under a pile of yellow sapsucker's dung at the base of Toccoa Falls in Northeast Georgia. However, after carbon dating proved this collection was a hoax, even the most diehard scholars gave up hope of the world ever bearing witness to an authentic series of these wondrously grotesque tales.
However, just this year, Prof. Odysseus Malodorus, B.S., M.S. PhD., has discovered the one and only extant copy of this book, annotated it, and in conjunction with Creepy Little Productions and illustrator, Madame M., the book has finally been published.
For those who are unfamiliar with this mythical series, The Tales of the Truly Grotesque tells the totally true adventures of a webbed-footed, webbed-handed, brilliant 13 year-old girl named Joan of Arkansas who is being chased around the world by one of the top five most villainous men of all time, flea-circus ringmaster and pencil-neck geek, Lazlo Bleak and his band of merry side-show freaks.
This deluxe, illustrated, annotated edition features hundreds of footnotes to help young adult readers learn vocabulary words. Written in the vein of the works of Roald Dahl and the films of Tim Burton, this series has already developed a cult following.
Prof. Malodorus, who is best known as the author of 101 Ways to Make Flatulence Work for You, is annotating Book 2, Hook, Lion & Stinker right now and it should be out soon...
ABOUT PROF. ODYSSEUS MALODORUS
Much of the life of Prof. Odysseus Malodorous, B.S., M.S., Ph.D., is shrouded in mystery and can not be confirmed, including his whereabouts and whether he is still alive, deceased or just horribly lost. However, there are certain verifiable particulars that do exist. These, then, are those known facts. Prof. Odysseus Malodorus was (or still is) the CEO of Team Malodorus, LLC. He received his B.S. from the University of Excrescence, with a major in Stench Studies. He was granted a Master of Science at The University of St. Succubus in the Study of Putrification with a Master‚s Thesis on "The Half-Life of Fetid Armpits among Brazilian Soccer Players in the World Cup in 1974." He received his Ph.D. in Gastro-Enterological Studies from The College of Liberal Secretions with a dissertation entitled, "Cesspools, Compost, and Me: How I turned a Swamp of Fecal Matter into One of America's Favorite Vacation Spots and Snack Meats." He is the author of the articles, "Ten Ways To Dress Up Your Lower GI Tract," "How To Be a Good Host To Many Friendly Parasites," and of course, his Pulitzer Prize winning article from The American Journal of Bodily Discharges entitled, "How To Keep Toe Jam And Ear Wax out of the Hands of Angry Terrorists Who May Use It For Plastique Explosives." But of course, he is probably best known for being the author of The New York Times best-seller, "101 Ways to Make Flatulence Work for You. "
He was a member of the National Phlegm-Lovers Society, and his athletic supporter was a third place winner in the Jock Itch of the Year Competition. In addition, he has received a Fellowship from The Mucous Society of America and of course, for seven years in a row, he received the Golden Sphincter for having the most active rectum in America.
Here now, is what little is known about his origins and personal life. After being abandoned as a newborn infant and left in a MacDonald‚s Quarter Pounder styrofoam container in the backwoods outside Texarkana, Ody (as his friends called him) was raised by a rogue gang of feral pencil-neck geeks who ran a freak show. Among the freaks who raised and educated him, he most loved an African-American blues singer with flippers for hands named Blind Mad Dog Kropotkin who is best known for his stirring rendition of "Smells Like Teen Spirit."
To pay for his massive education, he rented out his body to science. In fact, for many years, science used the power of his excessive flatulence to light up the Las Vegas Strip. In his spare time, it is rumored he enjoyed crocheting hats out of old Diet Pepsi cans. Most of his adult life has been spent traveling all across the globe in search of the books of Tales of The Truly Grotesque. His tireless travels may also have been the result of the fact that the law is after him in several states for numerous unfortunate infractions he committed in the late 1970‚s. There are many who claim he is still alive. If this is so, odds are he is still out and about doing further research. While he travels, since he is very cheap, there is a good chance he will stay at the homes of each and every one of his dear readers around the world. For those who are eager to reach him, there is no guarantee that he will respond, since he may be dead. However, the best way to contact Prof. Malodorus is through email and the website of Team Malodorus, LLC.Stay malodorus and truly grotesque!
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