Although the material in this book is used by clinicians in the field of psychology, all of the concepts and methods are discussed in everyday terms. Each important point is amplified with anecdotes and actual examples from my rich background in helping people achieve happier and more fulfilling lives. Even though the presentation of this material is oriented around couple relationships and sexual functioning, it is important to know that these techniques are just as effective in producing desired change in all of the other significant areas of life. The following set of resources is a therapist's guidebook that anyone can use to resolve problems and make their life more of what they want it to be.
This revised and expanded edition of this work (formerly titled They Lived Happily Ever After) contains all of the methods and techniques formulated by my colleagues and me during our development of the field of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). That remains unchanged; none of the original book has been deleted since each item has proven its value in creating positive change. But while this book has received a generous and enthusiastic response over the years, time has not stood still and even an excellent product of the past needs updating and improvement.
In addition to stylistic revisions, I have added several important new techniques that I developed during the past few years. These techniques work to remedy problems that were generally considered unsolvable when I first wrote this book. The new sections on the threshold pattern in relationships (Chapters 9 and 17) are especially relevant to anyone who wants to understand the process of falling in and out of love, and to everyone who wants to know what to do to maintain a loving an supportive relationship.
I have written this book for anyone who wants the experience of sexual fulfillment and nurturing relationships to reside within the realm of choice and control. The information contained in the following pages is for seekers and doers, people who will not settle for less when they know that more is within reach.
Be comfortable and curious as you read this book. Recognize yourself and others in the descriptions and stories. Practice the techniques--they work. Use what you are about to learn, and enjoy.
"synopsis" may belong to another edition of this title.
My purpose in modeling human experience is to overcome limitations and transform them into possibilities rich with choices. The purpose of this book is to make available to you the information and skills which make it possible to be successful in helping people establish enriching and fulfilling couple relationships, including mutually-satisfying sexual expression. The skills presented in this book include perceptual and behavioral options you need to transform a person's experience from a set of limitations to a set of choices. Each model and change technique includes a behavioral outcome that is easily-testable and verifiable in your sensory experience, leaving no doubt about its validity.
A model is a representation of experience, in the same way that a map is a representation of an area of territory, or a model airplane is a representation of a full-sized functioning airplane. The models presented here are blueprints for moving from unwanted to wanted experience. These models of change satisfy four conditions: (1) they work to produce the results they were designed for, (2) they are described in a step-by-step manner, so they are learnable and reproducible, (3) they are elegant, i.e., they use the least number of steps necessary to achieve the outcome, and (4) they are independent of content and deal with the form of the process, and therefore have universal applicability.
The models of change presented here use explicit, operational procedures to move a person from one specific experience to another. It is possible to give people directions that, when followed, will results in their arrival at the desired location. What is needed is knowledge of the present location, knowledge of the desired location, and knowledge of the possible routes between the two. If you have an overview of a maze, it is quite simple to chart a path from the center of the maze to freedom. Without such an overview you would waste precious time and energy on circular wanderings and dead ends. This book shows you how to determine the present or existing experiential location and how to specify the desired experiential location; it also provides choices (with instructions) for going from one to another.
"About this title" may belong to another edition of this title.
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