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The former National Security Advisor offers a behind-the-scenes look at the Nixon, Ford, and Reagan administrations, focusing on the Iran-Contra Affair and the Strategic Defense Initiative

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PREFACE
The President of the United States of Anierica To all who shall see tbese presents, greeting: 1

Know Ye, that reposing special trust and confidence in the patriotism, valor, fidelity and abilities of Robert Carl McFarlane, I do appoint him: Second Lieutenant, United States Marine Corps (June 1959), Captain (February 1964), Major (November 1967), Lieutenant Colonel (June 1975), Special Assistant to the President for National Security Affairs (December 1976), Counselor of the Department of State (February 1981), Deputy Assistant to the President for National Security Affairs (January 1982), Personal Representative of the President in the Middle East (July 1983), Assistant to the President of the United States of America for National Security Affairs (October 1983).

Over the course of the past two centuries, the idea of representative democracy has been adopted by Americans as the definitive model of governance. Rather than holding referenda on each major policy issue as some countries such as Switzerland do, we choose people-and empower them to choose others-to represent us, to consider alternatives, to use judgment, occasionally to take risks, ultimately to decide for us and to govern. We repose enormous trust in these individuals, yielding to them authority to spend huge sums and charging them with the conduct of affairs of state, including even the declaration of war. Over time, their character, ideas, and judgments, as well as the overall vindication or breach of this "special trust" by them, are an important determinant of whether we prosper or decline as a nation. This concept of "reposing special trust" is a reciprocal covenant in which the electorate yields part of its sovereignty in exchange for the official(s)' commitment to live up to certain rules-not to break the law, not to lie, cheat or steal or in any other way violate the public trust. We don't do this haphazardly. Understanding human failings, we built accountability into the concept and structured the branches of government and their relationship to us through such things as periodic elections and daily press scrutiny as the means to keep the ship of state on course; or at least to keep things from going too far wrong. When an official or a group has done something corrupt or foolish, our approach has been to enact new law to circumscribe the authority of public servants, to tighten the rules, to limit their freedom to act, or to increase their reporting responsibilities, in an effort to better assure against future sin or ineptitude. For most of our history, this idea of reposing special trust in others has worked well. At least we can say it has helped us avoid catastrophe, although it must be acknowledged that for the first 150 years, the government's role was a much smaller part of our lives. It didn't have the authority to get into very much trouble. As the scope of government has broadened and its power and influence have spread both at home and internationally, our country has been blessed with scores of men and women of superior intellect and an elevated sense of patriotism who have enabled us to keep the peace, win the wars and over time, prosper. Such men as Paul Nitze come to mind, a man who has devoted 50 years of his life to public service and made historic contributions to our victory in the cold war, the control and ultimate reduction of nuclear weapons and many other landmark achievements. This book is about my attempt to vindicate the special trust I was privileged to take on as an officer in the Marines, as a senior official of the Department of State and as a member of the White House staff for nine years, culminating in my appointment as President Reagan's National Security Adviser. I look back on my life as a great adventure, filled with challenge, controversy, risk, danger, and achievement, as well as failure and near-tragedy. It is all here-as objectively as I can recall it. With nine years distance from government and, I believe, a better perspective on the substantial changes over the past forty years in how it functions, I have tried to do two things in this book. The first is to record my version of history, relying on notes taken at the time and from extended reference to my personal papers from those years, held at the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library, at the National Archives and at the National Security Council. My second goal is to convey through a hundred stories-from the jungles of Vietnam to the cloistered corridors of the Kremlin, from the Byzantine chambers of the Middle East to the pristine yet somewhat tarnished West Wing of the White House-how the concept of "reposing special trust and confidence" has been eroded and why. I will also add a word on how to restore the special trust to its original status as a covenant that has stood us successfully through more than two centuries of greatness and, if renewed, can enable us to vindicate the American role of leadership into the third. Finally, in the course of providing my comment on these temporal events, I hope to convey my belief in and understanding of a larger "special trust" we all enjoy. And that is the trust from God to develop ourselves to the limit of our endowment, to apply the skills thus honed to the benefit of others, and in all things to be humble.

FROM CHAPTER ONE: Early one afternoon in February 1987, without telling anyone where I was going, I left my office in Washington, D.C., got into my car, and went to look for a place to die. As I drove up Canal Road along the Potomac River, a terrible pall hung over me. I struggled with feelings of shame and despair, feelings that were more than just a state of mind. Strange physical sensations gripped me. I felt an acute pressure, as though the world were bearing down upon me, squeezing me into a ball that would grow smaller and smaller until at last it would violently implode. My toes and fingers began to tingle, and I found myself absurdly worrying that I might have an accident that would thwart my plans to kill myself. For this is what I fully intended to do. In two days, I would end my life, a life of accomplishment, recognition and service, a life full of blessings-loving family, good friends, useful work, years of promise still lying ahead. The life of a man with everything to live for. A life, therefore, that would compensate for the wrong I believed I had done my country. The trip this day was a reconnaissance mission. I had determined how and when to die; today I would determine where. I had served in the U.S. Marine Corps for 20 years; planning to the last detail for the execution of every operation had become a matter of habit. I yearned to die because I knew that dying was the right thing to do. Driving along the Potomac in the fading light of a cold winter day, I thought how fitting a river setting would be for my last moments. My wife, Jonny, and I had always loved the river; for years, we had dreamed of owning a house with a view overlooking the Potomac's rolling waters. I turned into Carderock recreational area, a large park located on a bluff above the Potomac just beyond the Beltway in Montgomery County, Maryland. The south end consists of ball fields and a number of covered pavilions for large parties. We had had a picnic there several years before with many of my classmates from the U.S. Naval Academy. As I circled the grounds, it occurred to me that the Park Police probably patrolled the south end so frequently that I would be discovered before the pills I intended to take would have time to act. I drove on. To the north, the park is natural wilderness, dotted with only occasional family-sized picnic areas. Trails wind through the woods and along the bluff overlooking the river. On weekends, the bluff is a popular place for rock climbers and Outward Bound veterans. One or two spots boast a 50 to 60-foot rappel. I left the car in the parking lot, bothered again by the thought that it would serve as a tipoff for the Park Police. I struck out northward on the trail, hoping to find a secluded spot overlooking the river but hidden from the view of passersby. Unfortunately, the terrain between the C&O canal and the river narrows to no more than 200 yards in this area, and the number of small trails increases. In winter, there is no cover, so a person is visible almost anywhere. Dismayed, growing anxious, I clambered onto the rocks and began searching for likely hiding places. Surely somewhere in this vast space there was a concealed spot where a man could die in peace, undiscovered and undisturbed. I found one or two niches that I thought might work, and sat in each of them for five minutes or so, crouching awkwardly in my business suit and overcoat. But each time, I was flushed out by couples who were obviously seeking the same privacy, only for more constructive purposes. My sense of despair deepened. The park apparently would not work. The threat of discovery before I had achieved my goal was too great. The wind whipped through the trees and whistled past my head, stinging my eyes and bringing tears. In the gathering dusk, my heart weighed down, I headed back to the car. In my mind I turned over a handful of other possible scenarios for my death, but each had some drawback I could not overcome. Finally, reluctantly, I gave in to the truth-that what I really wanted to do was simply to go to sleep as always with Jonny-and not wake up. The thought of having her discover me in the morning gave me pause, yet I selfishly rationalized that at least in the years to come, she might be comforted by the fact that I had wanted to be with her to the very end. What was a man like myself doing in that desolate park on that gray day, contemplating and planning his own demise? I was a prominent and respected figure in the nation's capital. I had been a highly-placed government official-National Security Adviser to President Ronald Reagan. Fourteen months earlier, I had left that post on a high note of achievement that included helping to negotiate the first reductions in U.S. and Soviet nuclear weapons in history. Now privately in residence at a Washington think tank, I was still much in demand on the lecture circuit, in academia and in media circles for my knowledge of foreign policy. Over 30 years, I had built up a career and reputation that placed me among the top ranks of the nation's foreign policy professionals, which brought me power, status and regard. A few short months before, my future had appeared only bright. What could have happened to make me so determined to end my life? What could have happened to alter everything, to make me so anxious, to plunge me into the abyss of suicidal depression? Before that February of 1987, 1 had never imagined suicide as a conceivable act-for me or for any other McFarlane. If I had even contemplated its possibility, it would have been solely in the military tradition, to prevent being caught in a compromising situation as a prisoner -- self-destruction as a lesser evil than betrayal. Otherwise, like most people, I would have thought of suicide as an irrational act, the last refuge of the hopeless. Yet in recent days, the thought of taking my own life had overpowered me; it had gripped me with an unassailable logic and had taken on legitimacy as a just and fitting duty-the right thing to do. After weeks of deepening anguish and despair, it had come to me with an illuminating clarity from the most distant corner of my mind. The spiritual pulse was clear: "Go ahead. This is the way." Not the way out-out of my predicament, out of the spotlight in whose glare I stood exposed, out of the hearings and the news reports and the gossip columns, out of the sidelong glances of strangers in the street, out of life. I was not looking for escape, not that. But for the way to make things right. For nearly 30 years, I had been a public servant, dedicating my life's labors to the good of my country in the manner of my father before me. I had shaped my life according to the principles taught me first by him, then re-emphasized at the U.S. Naval Academy, and finally by the U.S. Marine Corps. "Duty, honor, country"-these were the real values I had honestly striven to sustain in all my endeavors, the absolutes I cherished and wished to uphold. In the course of my career, I had risen steadily from one position of trust to another, first through the Marine Corps, and then in government, where I had ultimately chosen to concentrate my skills. I had worked hard, believing what I was doing was not simply work, not primarily a career, but over and above all service, a genuine dedication of myself, my work, my life to the good of the country and its people. For this, I had been generously rewarded. I had left government at the zenith of my career, believing I had a great many more contributions to make even from the private sector. But now, everything seemed in jeopardy-my future, the government, the country. And I believed that for this, I was responsible. I believed the Iran-contra scandal, which had in the last three months all but engulfed the Reagan administration, and by extension the country, was all my fault. Certainly the "judges" of Washington-from the broadcast bureaus to the halls of Capitol Hill-said so. Since the previous November, I had appeared time and again before the congressional committees investigating the so-called arms-for-hostages deal by means of which the President and his men had sought to rescue the seven Americans then held captive by Shia Muslim terrorists in Beirut. I had told the presidentially-appointed Tower Board, which was also looking into the affair, the story of how our approach to Iran had begun while I was National Security Adviser, and how it had gone astray after I left the government. I had appeared on Nightline, the Today show, the CBS Moming News and countless other television news shows, and granted a dozen newspaper interviews, to explain that we had never intended a simple ransom arrangement; that our goals at the beginning had been larger, geostrategic, aimed at finding an opening to pragmatic elements in the regime of the fanatically anti-American Ayatollah Khomeini, an opening to people who might ultimately replace him. The trouble was, this was not what the journalists wanted to hear, and so the stories were always boiled down to a simple equation: arms-for-hostages, Reagan Deals with Terrorists. And the trouble was, I was the only one talking. No one else had come forward to back me up. Not the President who had approved and backed the Iran initiative from the very beginning. Not the Secretaries of State and Defense, George Shultz and Caspar Weinberger, who had known of all the developments. Not the men with whom I had worked so closely as National Security Adviser and who had carried on the Iran dealings after I resigned from that post-John Poindexter, who had been my deputy and had taken over as the top man after I left, and Oliver North, the zealous young Marine lieutenant colonel who had served as my right-hand man on so many occasions. John and Ollie had taken the Fifth, George and Cap had distanced themselves from the whole imbroglio, and the President remained sealed behind a wall of advisers who had allowed him only the occasional miscast statement on the matter. I had been devastated by the news stories that were leaked out of Ronald Reagan's first session before the Tower Board in late Janua...

Review:
"Special Trust" is a well-shaped, responsible and plausible volume. -- Los Angeles Times, November 6, 94

An absorbing, revealing, and sometimes searing account by a dedicated public servant of his participation at the highest levels in some of the most important and controversial policy events of our time. -- Brent Scowcroft, National Security Advisor to Presidents Ford and Bush, August 10, 1994

As a man of conscience...McFarlane has written not only a touching personal memoir, but also an invaluable account of the formulation of American foreign policy during the Reagan years. -- Senator Sam Nunn, Chairman, Senate Armed Forces Committee. August 15, 1994

Robert C. McFarlane's Special Trust is more interesting, and more convincing, than most [memoirs]. -- New York Times, November 13, 1994

This book greatly exceeded my expectation...With all of its rich and vibrant detail...Special Trust has an electricity absent from other accounts... -- Foreign Service Journal, January, 1995

Yesterday I bought Special Trust and could not put it down until I was completely finished...I was gripped from the very beginning. -- William F. Martin, former Deputy Secretary of Energy, for Pres. Bush, September 16, 1994

[Special Trust] will stand as a classic of the genre and a priceless contribution to the history of our times. -- John H. Taylor, Director of The Richard Nixon Library and Birthplace, September 19, 1994

[Written] with clarity and without anger...Special Trust illustrates the life and perceptions of a man who did his best to live up to the special trust and confidence he swore to as a commissioned officer of Marines...a must-read. -- Marine Corps Gazette, March 1995

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  • PublisherUNKNO
  • Publication date1994
  • ISBN 10 1569778809
  • ISBN 13 9781569778807
  • BindingHardcover
  • Edition number1
  • Number of pages399
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