From The Shadows: A Journey of Self-Discovery and Renewal (Loving the Child Within Series) - Softcover

Onyeabor, Elizabeth

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1627472320 ISBN 13: 9781627472326

Publisher: Sojourn Publishing, LLC, 2016

Synopsis

Offering hope and healing, the author retraces her beautiful transformation from suicidal despair to habitual happiness, sprinkling each step with soul-stirring original poetry and journal excerpts. For decades, she hid her chronic depression from everyone, including herself, until hitting a crisis point. She seemed successful and happy to all, except her closest confidantes; they knew the anguish she wished to end by killing herself. Through self-exploration, she found a pathway to conquer the pain. In From the Shadows, she shares the questions she confronted, unearths her root causes, and presents a map out of the mire. Finally, she unlocks inner wealth by facing phantoms holding long forgotten keys to her past. Joining in her journey, you may uncover a few treasures of your own. Whirlpool of pain, despair I share. For your own gain, I bring you there. Sucked me down, but will lift you up-- The gifts uncovered, when unstuck. Maelstrom drew me time and again; Me, myself, and I weren't as friend. A shadow plagued my destiny, Before sunlit divinity. Hear my story, treasure I found. As it unfolds, soul almost drowned. Reveal my grief, the guilt and shame, unwinding as I blend my name. Listen as I share of rebirth-- meaning and passion's soulful mirth. Lure you in then lighten your load; A wealth inside worth more than gold. Precious self-love and purpose too. Join in this journey to renew.

About this title

From the Author:

You may feel crazy, but you're not crazy. You may feel hopeless, but I offer you hope. As tormented as I was, I am now healed.

You can heal, too.

Having struggled with undiagnosed depression since my teenage years, I hit the darkest period in my early fifties when suicide often seemed the only solution to salve my pain. I was what you may call a high-functioning depressive. In spite of my outward achievements, unless you were a confidante in my innermost circle, you had no idea the intense anguish,  emptiness, and self-loathing haunting me.

But what plagued me was so much more. It was hopelessness. "The hopelessness was an immeasurable burden burrowing a black hole through me, swallowing all my light.

Saying I needed to love myself was easy. Doing it wasn't. I knew I needed to feel better about myself to fill the void, but I often filled it with distractions and activities like surfing the internet and watching TV. Once the activities stopped, the emptiness came back.

In the deepest parts of my depression, you would not have noticed my aching void and despair. I went to work. I joked, and I laughed. I performed. I wore the mask of Liz well. It was comfortable.

You did not see me in my alone times. You did not see the nights I came home and vegetated in front of the television. I knew I was vegetating. I knew it was a distraction. I would weep at some of the stories. They would dig up despondency and help me to feel more alone in my city of over 18 million.

                        TV
pixelation immersion absorption
         distortion dereliction
                distraction
                 numbing
      desensitizing hammering
pestering paralyzing ruminating

I placed phone calls and wrote letters. Social media helped me to keep track of all the masks everybody else was wearing in my extended circle and all their busyness.That sounds cynical. I mean merely that we often put our best foot forward on social media, showing images of our happy family, all smiling. Every family has disagreements and areas of intense heartache. We don't show those to everyone. Some of us don't even acknowledge it. I get it. I lived it."

I'll guide you along my path, walking through the valley of my shadow, struggling to scale the summit of self-love, and ultimately ascending to new heights of resplendent reawakening.

From the Back Cover:

Renewal

Whirlpool of pain, despair I share
For your own gain, I bring you there.
 
Sucked me down, but will lift you up -
The gifts uncovered, when unstuck.
 
Maelstrom drew me time and again;
Me, myself, and I weren't as friend.
 
A shadow plagued my destiny,
Before sunlit divinity.
 
Hear my story,treasure I found,
As it unfolds, soul almost drowned.
 
Reveal my grief, the guilt and shame,
Unwinding as I blend my name.
 
Listen as I share of rebirth -
Meaning and passion's soulful mirth.
 
Lure you in, then lighten your load;
A wealth inside worth more than gold.
 
Precious self-love and purpose too,
Join in this journey to renew.

About this edition

• Publisher: Sojourn Publishing, LLC
• Publication date: 2016
• ISBN 10: 1627472320
• ISBN 13: 9781627472326
• Binding: Paperback
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 206