How to Wow: Proven Strategies for Presenting Your Ideas, Persuading Your Audience, and Perfecting Your Image - Hardcover

Jones, Frances Cole

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 0345501780 ISBN 13: 9780345501783

Publisher: Ballantine Books, 2008

Synopsis

“The invaluable advice in How to Wow guarantees your success in any meeting situation, from the boardroom to the breakfast table.”
–Keith Ferrazzi, author of Never Eat Alone

In today’s fast-paced world, where an elevator ride with your CEO can turn into an impromptu meeting, your lunch date can become a job interview, and your conversation at a cocktail party may be a preamble to a potential business merger, knowing how to market yourself in any situation is vital. Corporate coach Frances Cole Jones has helped numerous CEOs, celebrities, and public personalities present their best selves on camera and onstage, in boardrooms and in person; now in her new book, How to Wow, she shares her strategies for making your mark in business and in life.

Every encounter, Jones believes, provides you with an opportunity to positively influence colleagues, employers, neighbors–even competitors. Not only your words, but your tone of voice and your body language speak volumes. The question, however, is: Are they working together to say what you want them to, as effectively as possible?

Inside, you’ll learn how to

· leave a lasting impression with a simple introduction
· effectively employ the twelve most persuasive words in the English language and command the stage, boardroom, or lunch table
· read nonverbal responses accurately–and shift negative ones immediately
· motivate your team under deadline
· interview fearlessly and flawlessly
· write the perfect pitch, résumè, cover letter, or e-mail
· deliver speeches that bring people to their feet
· transform a PowerPoint presentation into a powerful success

With easy-to-follow advice, amusing anecdotes, and immediately employable hints, Jones’s guidelines can keep you cool (even in hot water). From asking the right questions to giving the right answers, How to Wow will provide you with the confidence to be calm and commanding in all you do and to wow anyone anywhere anytime.

About this title

About the Author

Frances Cole Jones founded Cole Media Management in 1997. From the beginning, the company’s focus has been cultivating clients’ inherent strengths to develop the powerful communication skills that will enhance their professional and personal performance. The scope of her work includes preparation for television and print interviews, IPO road shows, meetings with potential investors, and internal meetings with partners, sales staff, and in-house personnel. She also provides presentation skills seminars and speechwriting for clients. She lives in New York City.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

CHAPTER ONE

Don’t Leave Home Without Them:
The Nonnegotiable General Principles
I began presenting myself early and, if I remember correctly, somewhat reluctantly.

When my siblings and I were in the age ranges of three to six, my father would line us up in the living room before a cocktail party and make us practice shaking hands with him before the guests arrived. (The Von Trapp family had nothing on us.) I still remember him looming over me, pumping my hand up and down while saying, “Look me in the eye, look me in the eye, look me in the eye . . .”

While I may not have enjoyed those impromptu personal presentation sessions, their effect was beneficial. To this day, I have a super handshake, and definitely look people in the eye when I greet them.

As with looking someone in the eye, there are some elements to presenting yourself that are nonnegotiable. Regardless of the situation, these fundamentals are necessary in order to make a strong and lasting impression. Whether you are presenting to one or one hundred—at a lunch, on the phone, with a speech or PowerPoint presentation—they will always be beneficial. These nonnegotiable principles are presented here. If you read or do nothing else in this book, incorporating these foundational elements into your daily communication and interaction will guarantee instantaneous, positive results in how people respond to you.

Dearly Beloved Data Lovers

The following statistic, from a study done by Albert Mehrabian, Professor Emeritus of psychology at UCLA, is among the first things I tell every client. Known as the “7%—38%—55% Rule” it states that there are three elements to any face-to-face communication: words, tone of voice, and body language, and we are influenced by these things as follows:

·7 percent of our influence comes from the words we say.

·38 percent from our tonal quality while saying it.

·55 percent by what our body is doing while we’re saying it.

What does this mean? So often we think presentation and communication are about the words we say. In fact, it’s often far more about how we say them, and what our body is doing while we are saying them.

For example, we’ve all been introduced to the person who says, “Nice to meet you” with a fishy hand, a nominal smile, and an over-our-shoulder-to-see-if-someone-more-interesting/important/ attractive-is-coming-in-the-room gaze. Contrast that with meeting someone who’s genuinely delighted to meet you.

Same words, very different message.

My goal in telling you this is to help you begin to consider the global impact of your message—to understand the importance of managing every aspect of your presentation style.

·Knowing that listeners often remember just 7 percent of the words you say will remind you to choose language that’s precise, colorful, and concise.

·Knowing that 38 percent of your impact comes from your tonal quality will reinforce the importance of having your tone match your message: be authoritative, commanding, persuasive, entertaining, etc, depending on your objective.

·Knowing that 55 percent of your impact comes from what your body is doing while you are speaking will encourage you to focus on how you can best express commitment to, and enthusiasm for, what you are saying through your facial expressions, posture, and gestures.

Breaking down your message in this way makes it much easier to figure out what you need to do to capture your listener’s attention. You can ask yourself:

·Is my language flabby?

·Do I sound happy when I’m giving good news, and genuinely sorry when I’m apologizing?

·If I were on television—and the sound was off—would someone walking by the TV know from my body language that I was enthusiastic about, or committed to, what I was saying?

As with anything, the first step to creating effective change is awareness. Now that you have a greater understanding of the factors in play when you present yourself, you can begin to pick and choose, strengthen or minimize, bump up or play down each element to achieve the results you desire.

Tell Me a Story

As children, we all felt the power of storytelling, its ability to transport us to another place and time. As adults, we feel it when we’re in the grip of a masterful book or movie. Using stories when speaking has the same effect on your listeners, and the added bonus of helping you retain and commit to the message you want to deliver.

Two of the most frequent questions I get from new clients are “How can I get rid of filler words like ‘um’ and ‘uh’?” and “What should I do with my hands?” Embedding their answers in stories solves both these problems. Think about it, when was the last time you were wrapped up in telling your best friend or coworker your latest grievance against your spouse or your boss and simultaneously using filler words or worrying about what your hands were doing? It’s simply not possible.

An important point to remember in this is that the story doesn’t have to be long to be effective. I heard a great example of this on a morning talk show. The segment was “The best new minivans.” The speaker said, “This minivan is so big you can drive six kids to soccer practice, pick up some wood from the lumberyard on the way home, and build a tree house with them that afternoon.”

Excellent storytelling, and not a stray “um” to be found.

How can you find the shorthand story that will make you memorable? The quickest way is to speak from your own experience—which will provide you with colorful, heartfelt examples—while simultaneously acknowledging your listener’s experience, situation, or expertise. Ask yourself, “Why do I care?” Then ask yourself, “Why should they care?” Once you have the answers to those questions, you’ll have a great story.

“My name is Bond”

From time to time I teach presentation skills seminars for new hires at large corporations. Inevitably, at some point during my pitch to a new firm, I hear, “Yes, but most of the time all these kids get to say in meetings is their name.” “All?” is my response. (At this point, I know the person I’m speaking to might benefit from some presentation skills training, too.) Why? Because you are never “just” saying your name. Presenting the self is an opportunity.

The best example of this I can think of is, “My name is Bond. James Bond.”

Regardless of who’s saying it, Roger Moore, Sean Connery, or Daniel Craig, within that one sentence we hear a world of possibility.

In the same way, then, whenever you introduce yourself you need to say your name with such panache that your listener:

·remembers it.

·is left thinking, “Wow, that guy was impressive. . . . Am I supposed to know him?”

·is so knocked out by your “presentation” he wants to get to know you better.

If it helps, you can imagine you have “Q” as your backup, an Aston Martin as your getaway car, and a cold martini waiting at home.

So whether you are sitting in an executive board meeting, standing up at the PTA, or shaking hands in an elevator, always give your name the VIP treatment that flags it as a “Marquee Name” for those around you, leaving them alive to the possibilities and opportunities that knowing you offers them.

Useless Modifiers Are Just That

“It’s great, it’s amazing, it’s incredible, it’s so cool . . .”

Can you tell from the above whether it’s your boss talking about the new hotel he just stayed in, your coworker telling you about her new car, or your teenager describing the new telephone he wants you to get him?

Nope.

The only way we’ll believe your experience or product or skill set is amazing is if you tell us why. And it’s not enough to include the answers to the standard reporters’ questions: who, what, where, when, and why. We need to know—what did you see? Hear? Touch? Taste? Smell? How did it make you feel? What did it remind you of?

A good place to see people practicing this is on cooking shows. Because we can’t smell or taste the food, these chefs have to describe those elements in detail. “The smell of these cookies baking reminds me of sitting on my Grandma’s back porch watching the laundry dry on the line . . .”

As with most things, this is a skill that comes with practice. Initially, your practice will just be to notice when others are falling back on “great,” “amazing,” “incredible.” One place I hear this a lot is with actor interviews. A common interview question actors are asked when their new movie opens is, “What was it like to work with so-and-so director/ fellow actor?” In these moments, unless there’s been some coaching, many actors fall back on, “He was great.” “She was amazing . . .” Granted these stock responses are understandable. They don’t want to say, “Oh my goodness, I was in hell.” What, then, could they do instead? What’s a safe answer that also highlights their intelligence? Tell us a story: “One thing I didn’t expect was his wicked sense of humor. He played the most ridiculous jokes on the entire cast. For example, one day he . . .” etc.

Once you’ve spent some time observing others, you will want to begin to notice your own habits. How was your day? Your sandwich? The movie? Have your friends challenge you. Can you get through each of their questions without using a single useless modifier? Once you accept the challenge, ...

About this edition

• Publisher: Ballantine Books
• Publication date: 2008
• ISBN 10: 0345501780
• ISBN 13: 9780345501783
• Binding: Hardcover
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 224