Understanding Men's Passages: Discovering the New Map of Men's Lives - Hardcover

Sheehy, Gail

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 0679452737 ISBN 13: 9780679452737

Publisher: Random House, 1998

Synopsis

This is a book every man should read and every woman will.

Understanding Men's Passages is the most intimate and candid account of what men's lives are really like today, revealing their doubts, their passions, their hunger for renewal. Given their increasingly unpredictable and elongated lives, men need to reinvent themselves and expand the ways they demonstrate their manliness.  
     Hundreds of men have told their stories in their own words to Gail Sheehy, author of the bestselling New Passages and The Silent Passage. Sheehy makes the case that it is men in middle life who have the best chance to become masters of their fates. Featured are confidences from both celebrities and everyday heroes, creating a mirror in which every man can locate his possibilities for growth and change. These bold, feisty, imaginative men recount how they have discovered what is missing and forged new directions to invigorate the second half of their lives. They share a fantastic secret: "Hey, I'm not as old as I used to be!"
     Understanding Men's Passages is a concise guide for men (and the women in their lives) as they confront the major issues of each passage:

¸  How do you make change work for you?
¸  Where can you find new passion and pur-pose?
¸  How can you be the father you wish your father was?
¸  What can you do to exercise influence as you grow older?
¸  How can you deal successfully with "male menopause"?
¸  What strategies can defeat depression?
¸  How can you survive a job change or downsizing?
¸  What keeps a man young?
¸  When men and women face the same passage with different needs and directions, how does marriage survive?

     The stories of men who are redirecting their lives offer concrete information as well as inspiration.Gail Sheehy's Understanding Men's Passages will be a man's secret friend--a short, witty, knowing guide to self-renewal. And every woman will find it a must-read.

About this title

Review:

Gail Sheehy's taboo-breaking book about women's menopause, The Silent Passage, was named one of the most influential books of our time by the Library of Congress. Understanding Men's Passages is just as powerful and is certain to change the landscape of the psychology of men. Inspired by her husband's struggle with a midlife career crisis, Sheehy has compiled nearly 10 years worth of interviews and research into this book, revealing the fears and self-doubts of men over 40 who struggle with identity crises both at work and with their partners and children.

Sheehy also defines male menopause as a period in which hormones, including testosterone--and therefore potency and sex drive--drop, and men suffer from irritability and mood swings. She cites the statistics that claim more than 52 percent of men between the ages of 40 and 70 can expect some degree of impotence--which translates into at least 20 million men. "When ignored or denied, this sexual freeze extends more deeply into every aspect of a man's life than was previously thought," she writes. "It can be an underlying cause of depression, divorce, even suicide."

The men Sheehy interviewed were surprisingly candid about their situations and are glad that they've opened up a discourse. Says one man about the silence regarding sexual changes his father endured during his passage into male menopause: "The only sign of getting older probably was that earlier trip to the bathroom in the morning--which we call the six a.m. passage." In addition to covering male menopause and the latest treatments for impotence, Sheehy also includes chapters on how to handle empty-nest syndrome, job downsizing, and the strain on marriage that retirement brings about, but her main point rings clear throughout: "We need an expanded definition of manliness."

From the Back Cover:

"An optimistic analysis of adult development in pessimistic times. . . . It is grounded in the economic and psychological realities that make adult life so complex today."

--The New York Times Book Review

Passages

"Provokes the same recognition that we experience in a good novel. . . . Her research is thorough and imaginative . . . irresistibly invites the reader to join in."

--The New York Times Book Review

The Silent Passage

"A compelling discussion about menopause. Laid out eloquently are the facts, the folklore, and the fears."

--Kirkus Reviews

About this edition

• Publisher: Random House
• Publication date: 1998
• ISBN 10: 0679452737
• ISBN 13: 9780679452737
• Binding: Hardcover
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 292