Synopsis
An indispensable handbook on all aspects of fatherhood during the first 12 months, by the author of The Expectant Father.
In each chapter, Brott focuses on What’s Going On with the Baby; What You’re Going Through; What’s Going On with Your Partner; You and Your Baby; Family Matters; and more. The latest research, as well as time-honored wisdom―and humor, thanks to New Yorker cartoons and Brott’s light touch―make The New Father indispensable for the modern father who doesn’t want to miss a moment of his child’s first year.
What’s new?
• How technology is changing fatherhood
• Changing definitions of fatherhood
• Changes in the way society deals with dads―from changing tables in public men’s rooms to workplace flexibility
• Research proving that a father’s love is just as important as a mother’s
• How being an involved dad rewires a man’s brain
• How changes in women’s roles in the family affect dads and their roles
• Special concerns for: young dads, older dads, at-home dads, unmarried dads, dads in same-sex couples, dads in blended families, dads of kids with special needs, and men who became dads with the help of technology
• The special impact dads have on girls and boys
• Specific strategies dads can use to get―and stay―involved in their children’s lives
• Updated resources for new fathers
Not to mention new research and information on:
• How to understand what your baby is telling you
• Babies’ amazing abilities
• Baby massage--they love it!
• The latest on vaccinations and healthcare
• And much, much more
"synopsis" may belong to another edition of this title.
About the Author
Armin A. Brott is a nationally recognized parenting expert and the author of ten critically acclaimed books for fathers, including The New Father: A Dad’s Guide to the First Year and The New Father: A Dad’s Guide to the Toddler Years, 12–36 Months. He also writes a syndicated newspaper column, Ask Mr. Dad, and hosts a weekly radio show, Positive Parenting. To learn more, visit his website, mrdad.com.
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Introduction
Nobody really knows how or when it started, but one of the most widespread—and most cherished—myths about child-rearing is that women are naturally more nurturing than men, that they are instinctively better at the parenting thing, and that men are nearly incompetent.
The facts, however, tell a very different story. A significant amount of research has proven that men are inherently just as nurturing and responsive to their children’s needs as women. What too many men (and women) don’t realize is that to the extent that women are “better” parents, it’s simply because they’ve had more practice. In fact, the single most important factor in determining the depth of long-term father-child relationships is opportunity.
Basically, it comes down to this: “Having children makes you no more a parent than having a piano makes you a pianist,” writes author Michael Levine in Lessons at the Halfway Point.
Men and women parent differently in a wide variety of ways:
• Dads tend to play more with their children than mothers do, and that play tends to be more rough-and-tumble and more unpredictable than mothers’. In other words, dads are more likely than moms to become human jungle gyms.
• Dads tend to emphasize independence more than moms and give children more freedom to explore. If a baby is struggling to grab a toy that’s just out of reach, mothers are more likely to move the toy closer, while dads are more likely to wait a little longer, seeing whether the baby will be able to get it. Moms are more likely to pick up a toddler who’s fallen, while dads are more like to encourage the child to get up on his own.
• Dads tend to use more complex speech patterns than mothers, who tend to simplify what they’re saying and slow it down. Dads also tend to ask their babies more open-ended questions (who, what, where, when, why) than moms, an approach that helps kids expand their vocabulary.
• Dads tend to think more about how a child will fare in the world as he or she grows; moms tend to think more about the child’s emotional development. When reacting to a test score, for example, a dad might be concerned about how the score will affect the child’s future plans and ability to be self-sufficient, while a mom is more likely to be concerned about how the score makes the child feel.
• Dads tend to represent the outside world while mothers represent the home. You can see this almost anyplace where parents are out with their babies: Dads tend to hold their children face out, while mothers hold them face in.
Please keep in mind here that I’m talking about general tendencies. Plenty of moms wrestle with their kids and use big words, and many dads rush to pick up fallen toddlers and hold their babies facing inward. The point is that they parent differently—not better or worse, just differently. And children benefit greatly from having plenty of exposure to both sides.
It shouldn’t come as a surprise, then, that fathers have very different needs from mothers when it comes to parenting information and resources. But more than a decade into the twenty-first century, the vast majority of books, videos, seminars, and magazine articles on raising kids are still aimed primarily at women and focus on helping them acquire the skills they need to be better parents. Fathers have been essentially ignored—until now.
HOW THIS BOOK IS DIFFERENT
Because babies develop so quickly, most resources aimed at parents of infants (babies from birth through twelve months) are broken down by month and focus mostly on how babies develop during this period. That’s pretty important stuff, so we spend a little time covering similar territory. However, the primary focus of The New Father: A Dad’s Guide to the First Year is on how dads change, grow, and develop over the first twelve months of fatherhood. That’s an approach that has rarely, if ever, been tried.
Going from man to father is one of the most dramatic changes you’ll ever experience. It’ll force you to rethink who you are, what you do, and what it means to be a man. Your relationships—with you partner, your parents, your friends, your coworkers—will change forever as you begin to reevaluate what’s important to you and reorder your priorities. Some parts of the man-to-father transition are sudden: one day it’s you and your partner, the next day you’ve got a baby. But for the most part, fatherhood is a gradual, ever-changing process that will last your entire lifetime. Most of us develop and change along fairly predictable lines, but the journey is always a little different for everyone.
The first year may be the most important one in your development as a father. It’s the time when you start forming those all-important parent-child bonds and start laying the foundation of your lifelong relationship with each other. It’s also especially interesting because the growth and development you experience during these first twelve months is kind of a condensed version of what you’ll go through over the rest of your life as a parent.
Each of the chapters is divided into several major sections:
What’s Going On with the Baby
This short section is designed to give you an overview of the four major areas of your baby’s development: physical, intellectual, verbal, and emotional/social. A lot of what you’re going to experience as a father is directly related to, or in response to, your children. So knowing the basics of your baby’s growth will help put your own growth into better perspective. Please remember, however, that babies develop at different rates, and that the range of “normal” behavior is very wide. If your baby isn’t doing the things covered in the predicted month, don’t worry. But if he’s more than a few months behind, check with your pediatrician.
What You’re Going Through
Because the things new dads think, worry, panic, dream, and rejoice about have largely been ignored in parenting books, many men think the feelings and concerns they have are abnormal. In this section we dig deep into what new fathers go through and the ways they grow and develop—emotionally and psychologically—over the course of their fatherhood. You’re a lot more normal than you think.
But wait, there’s more…
What’s Going On with Your Partner
One of the most important parts of being a good dad is being a good spouse. That’s why I’m including special sections in the first several chapters that deal with your partner’s physical, emotional, and psychological recovery and specific ways you can help.
Nobody really knows how or when it started, but one of the most widespread—and most cherished—myths about child-rearing is that women are naturally more nurturing than men, that they are instinctively better at the parenting thing, and that men are nearly incompetent.
The facts, however, tell a very different story. A significant amount of research has proven that men are inherently just as nurturing and responsive to their children’s needs as women. What too many men (and women) don’t realize is that to the extent that women are “better” parents, it’s simply because they’ve had more practice. In fact, the single most important factor in determining the depth of long-term father-child relationships is opportunity.
Basically, it comes down to this: “Having children makes you no more a parent than having a piano makes you a pianist,” writes author Michael Levine in Lessons at the Halfway Point.
Men and women parent differently in a wide variety of ways:
• Dads tend to play more with their children than mothers do, and that play tends to be more rough-and-tumble and more unpredictable than mothers’. In other words, dads are more likely than moms to become human jungle gyms.
• Dads tend to emphasize independence more than moms and give children more freedom to explore. If a baby is struggling to grab a toy that’s just out of reach, mothers are more likely to move the toy closer, while dads are more likely to wait a little longer, seeing whether the baby will be able to get it. Moms are more likely to pick up a toddler who’s fallen, while dads are more like to encourage the child to get up on his own.
• Dads tend to use more complex speech patterns than mothers, who tend to simplify what they’re saying and slow it down. Dads also tend to ask their babies more open-ended questions (who, what, where, when, why) than moms, an approach that helps kids expand their vocabulary.
• Dads tend to think more about how a child will fare in the world as he or she grows; moms tend to think more about the child’s emotional development. When reacting to a test score, for example, a dad might be concerned about how the score will affect the child’s future plans and ability to be self-sufficient, while a mom is more likely to be concerned about how the score makes the child feel.
• Dads tend to represent the outside world while mothers represent the home. You can see this almost anyplace where parents are out with their babies: Dads tend to hold their children face out, while mothers hold them face in.
Please keep in mind here that I’m talking about general tendencies. Plenty of moms wrestle with their kids and use big words, and many dads rush to pick up fallen toddlers and hold their babies facing inward. The point is that they parent differently—not better or worse, just differently. And children benefit greatly from having plenty of exposure to both sides.
It shouldn’t come as a surprise, then, that fathers have very different needs from mothers when it comes to parenting information and resources. But more than a decade into the twenty-first century, the vast majority of books, videos, seminars, and magazine articles on raising kids are still aimed primarily at women and focus on helping them acquire the skills they need to be better parents. Fathers have been essentially ignored—until now.
HOW THIS BOOK IS DIFFERENT
Because babies develop so quickly, most resources aimed at parents of infants (babies from birth through twelve months) are broken down by month and focus mostly on how babies develop during this period. That’s pretty important stuff, so we spend a little time covering similar territory. However, the primary focus of The New Father: A Dad’s Guide to the First Year is on how dads change, grow, and develop over the first twelve months of fatherhood. That’s an approach that has rarely, if ever, been tried.
Going from man to father is one of the most dramatic changes you’ll ever experience. It’ll force you to rethink who you are, what you do, and what it means to be a man. Your relationships—with you partner, your parents, your friends, your coworkers—will change forever as you begin to reevaluate what’s important to you and reorder your priorities. Some parts of the man-to-father transition are sudden: one day it’s you and your partner, the next day you’ve got a baby. But for the most part, fatherhood is a gradual, ever-changing process that will last your entire lifetime. Most of us develop and change along fairly predictable lines, but the journey is always a little different for everyone.
The first year may be the most important one in your development as a father. It’s the time when you start forming those all-important parent-child bonds and start laying the foundation of your lifelong relationship with each other. It’s also especially interesting because the growth and development you experience during these first twelve months is kind of a condensed version of what you’ll go through over the rest of your life as a parent.
Each of the chapters is divided into several major sections:
What’s Going On with the Baby
This short section is designed to give you an overview of the four major areas of your baby’s development: physical, intellectual, verbal, and emotional/social. A lot of what you’re going to experience as a father is directly related to, or in response to, your children. So knowing the basics of your baby’s growth will help put your own growth into better perspective. Please remember, however, that babies develop at different rates, and that the range of “normal” behavior is very wide. If your baby isn’t doing the things covered in the predicted month, don’t worry. But if he’s more than a few months behind, check with your pediatrician.
What You’re Going Through
Because the things new dads think, worry, panic, dream, and rejoice about have largely been ignored in parenting books, many men think the feelings and concerns they have are abnormal. In this section we dig deep into what new fathers go through and the ways they grow and develop—emotionally and psychologically—over the course of their fatherhood. You’re a lot more normal than you think.
But wait, there’s more…
What’s Going On with Your Partner
One of the most important parts of being a good dad is being a good spouse. That’s why I’m including special sections in the first several chapters that deal with your partner’s physical, emotional, and psychological recovery and specific ways you can help.
"About this title" may belong to another edition of this title.
Other Popular Editions of the Same Title
Search results for The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year
Stock Image
The New Father: A Dad's Guide
Seller: World of Books (was SecondSale), Montgomery, IL, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
Condition: Very Good. Item in very good condition! Textbooks may not include supplemental items i.e. CDs, access codes etc. Seller Inventory # 00100526593
Stock Image
The New Father: A Dad's Guide
Seller: World of Books (was SecondSale), Montgomery, IL, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
Condition: Good. Item in good condition. Textbooks may not include supplemental items i.e. CDs, access codes etc. Seller Inventory # 00066824857
Stock Image
The New Father A Dads Guide to
Seller: World of Books (was SecondSale), Montgomery, IL, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
Condition: Good. Item in good condition. Textbooks may not include supplemental items i.e. CDs, access codes etc. Seller Inventory # 00069250644
Stock Image
The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year (The New Father, 13)
Seller: Your Online Bookstore, Houston, TX, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
Paperback. Condition: Good. Seller Inventory # 0789211777-3-24556171
Stock Image
The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year (The New Father, 13)
Seller: Orion Tech, Kingwood, TX, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
Paperback. Condition: Good. Seller Inventory # 0789211777-3-25039133
Stock Image
The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year (The New Father, 13)
Seller: Gulf Coast Books, Cypress, TX, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
Paperback. Condition: Good. Seller Inventory # 0789211777-3-24094663
Seller Image
The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year
Seller: Reliant Bookstore, El Dorado, KS, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
Condition: very_good. This book is in excellent condition. There may be minimal writing on the inside cover or cover page. Cover image on the book may vary from photo. Ships out quickly in a secure plastic mailer. Seller Inventory # RDV.0789211777.VG
Seller Image
The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year
Seller: Greenworld Books, Arlington, TX, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
Condition: good. Fast Free Shipping â" Good condition. It may show normal signs of use, such as light writing, highlighting, or library markings, but all pages are intact and the book is fully readable. A solid, complete copy that's ready to enjoy. Seller Inventory # GWV.0789211777.G
Seller Image
The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year
Seller: Greenworld Books, Arlington, TX, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
Condition: very_good. Fast Free Shipping â" Very Good condition book with a firm cover and clean pages. Shows normal use and some light wear or limited notes markings. A solid, nice copy to enjoy. Seller Inventory # GWV.0789211777.VG
Stock Image
The New Father: A Dad's Guide to the First Year
Seller: Evergreen Goodwill, Seattle, WA, U.S.A.
Seller rating 5 out of 5 stars
paperback. Condition: Good. Seller Inventory # mon0000019581