Beyond Sibling Rivalry: How To Help Your Children Become Cooperative, Caring and Compassionate - Hardcover

Goldenthal Ph.D., Peter

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 0805056882 ISBN 13: 9780805056884

Publisher: Henry Holt and Co., 1999

Synopsis

A new way to look at sibling rivalry that sees children's relationships with each other in the context of the family as a whole. This is the first book to incorporate the latest thinking regarding family relationships as important contexts in which sibling relationships develop. Unlike other books that insist that conflicts among siblings reflect jealousy and a longing for parents' undivided attention, Dr. Goldenthal asserts that all family relationships have a bearing on rivalry between brothers and sisters--not only their relationship with each other but their relationship with their parents, and even their parents' relationships with their parents. Through examples of many different types of problem family situations, he gives practical guidelines and tools for solving common and not-so-common sibling conflicts. He shows parents of young children how to institute child-rearing practices that will prevent or at least diminish future sibling conflicts, and he provides strategies for reducing friction and stress among children when they arise.

About this title

Review

Yes, your children can have better relationships than you and your siblings did, says author Peter Goldenthal. In Beyond Sibling Rivalry, Goldenthal, a practicing psychologist specializing in sibling and family relationships, provides thoughtful and informative theory and practice for easing this challenging element of family life. In many ways, Beyond Sibling Rivalry is a general positive-parenting text that teaches parents to learn their child's needs by paying attention to the child. Yet, for specific examples and issues, Goldenthal focuses on sibling relationships. In 12 chapters, the book moves from predictable and preventable conflicts (preparing a child for a sibling's arrival, conflicts about sharing, and knowing when to intervene) to rivalry's more challenging issues (such as recognizing it in all its forms and compensating for the challenges that ADHD brings into the home).

Goldenthal bases his approach largely on famed psychiatrist Ivan Boszormenyi-Nagy's contextual theory--an approach that considers the entire family as the context for the sibling relationship and focuses on issues of fairness and justice to help resolve them. Goldenthal stresses the parental role in creating and encouraging sibling rivalry, encourages readers to examine their own sibling relationships, and teaches them how to stop encouraging competition between children by acknowledging individual talents and skills without comparison. Beyond Sibling Rivalry is a hopeful and proactive book. Goldenthal believes the ultimate cure for sibling rivalry is self-esteem and generosity, and the final chapters focus on facilitating empathy and altruism in your kids. --Ericka Lutz

About the Author

Peter Goldenthal, Ph.D., a practicing psychologist and expert in sibling rivalry, has worked with hundreds of families and children for many years. He lives in Devon, Pennsylvania.

About this edition

• Publisher: Henry Holt and Co.
• Publication date: 1999
• ISBN 10: 0805056882
• ISBN 13: 9780805056884
• Binding: Hardcover
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 246