I Beg to Differ: Navigating Difficult Conversations with Truth and Love - Softcover

Muehlhoff, Tim; Elshof, Gregg Ten

Softcover

ISBN 10: 0830844163 ISBN 13: 9780830844166

Publisher: IVP, 2014

Synopsis

How do we communicate with people who disagree with us? In today's polarized world, friends and strangers clash with each other over issues large and small. Coworkers have conflicts in the office. Married couples fight over finances. And online commenters demonize one another's political and religious perspectives. Is there any hope for restoring civil discourse? Communications expert Tim Muehlhoff provides a strategy for having difficult conversations, helping us move from contentious debate to constructive dialogue. By acknowledging and entering into the other person's story, we are more likely to understand where they're coming from and to cultivate common ground. Insights from Scripture and communication theory provide practical ways to manage disagreements and resolve conflicts. We can disagree without being disagreeable. And we can even help another see different points of view and learn from one another. Find out how.

About this title

About the Author

Tim Muehlhoff (PhD, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill) is associate professor of communication at Biola University in La Mirada, California, where he teaches classes in family communication, interpersonal communication and gender. His previous books include The God Conversation, Authentic Communication and Marriage Forecasting. He can be found online at timmuehlhoff.com.

Review

"If we do nothing beyond listening with a sincere desire to understand our opponents and ask ourselves this question, it's possible we'll get farther than by pushing our own position too hard. In our rush to convince others that we're right and they're wrong about issues, we often run roughshod over relationships that could be vital to creating lasting change on issues about which we are passionate. I Beg to Differ is an excellent resource with helpful chapter summaries for easily bookmarking the many communication strategies it presents." (Christine A. Scheller, Sojourners, December 2014)

"A number of years ago I determined two very important things about marriage: we are naturally very good at initiating conflict, and we are naturally very bad at resolving conflict. How you resolve conflict in your marriage, family and relationships will determine the depth of intimacy you experience in these relationships. I Beg to Differ is '911 to the rescue' for relationships. This may be the most important book you read this year." (Dennis Rainey, host, FamilyLife Today, founder and president, FamilyLife Ministries)

"In his book, I Beg to Differ, Tim Muehlhoff provides an edifying foundation for navigating life's difficult conversations. Balanced with a healthy dosage of theoretical and practical insight into speech, communication and word choice, Muehlhoff peppers his book with solid scriptural support, realistic life examples and illustrations and insight from some of the leading scholars in the field of communication." (Kevin Carrigan, Mennonite Brethren Herald, December 27, 2014)

"I head up a graduate program in Christian apologetics and I can't think of a better book to read if you want to engage others with the 'humility and respect' that the apostle writes about in 1 Peter 3:15. But understand, this book is for everybody: evangelists, pastors, spouses, friends, bosses, employees--anyone who needs to communicate with charity, confidence and clarity. Tim Muehlhoff has written yet another incredibly helpful book that really needs to be read far and wide." (Craig J. Hazen, founder and director of the Christian Apologetics Program at Biola University and author of Five Sacred Crossings)

"Muehlhoff has given us an informed and accessible introduction to the art and science of communication in difficult situations. This book distills the theory of successful communication and offers the reader practical guidance for its application." (From the foreword by Gregg Ten Elshof, director, Center for Christian Thought)

"For more than twenty years, I have benefited both personally and professionally from Tim's wisdom and coaching. He is a masterful communicator, and the principals contained in his most recent book are stunning. I can't say that I am looking forward to the next difficult conversation that I will have to have with a family member or friend, but I am confident that the timeless and proven principles contained in I Beg to Differ will help me communicate with integrity and clarity." (Chris Willard, director of generosity initiatives and premium service, Leadership Network, and coauthor of Contagious Generosity)

"Over the last twenty years or so, we have witnessed an explosion of important works in Christian apologetics. But what have been missing are books teaching us how to communicate our ideas in effective ways with those who have a different viewpoint. I Beg to Differ meets this need in a wonderful way. Muehlhoff brings together an expertise in communication, a deep integration of biblical teaching and decades of ministry experience to produce a book that is highly practical and theoretically solid. This is a must-read for anyone who wants to learn how to interact with people of different perspectives." (J. P. Moreland, Distinguished Professor of Philosophy, Biola University, and coauthor of The God Conversation)

"This book can pull your marriage out of the communication ditch. It's practical, authentic and full of helpful insight. It can help you move your marriage to a whole new level." (Bob Lepine, cohost, FamilyLife Today)

"Having worked in college ministry for over twenty years, we are always looking for resources to help people engage those with differing views on campus. With Tim Muehlhoff's help, even difficult conversations can foster understanding instead of driving a wedge." (Bob and Jill Fuhs, Cru staff, Los Angeles and Orange County)

"This is a deeply wise book. In it, Tim Muehlhoff offers hope, but not just hope; he also provides practical tools to help us communicate about differences in ways that foster growth more than division. Illustrating the book are powerful examples that are illuminated by Muehlhoff's seamless blending of insights from communication research and lessons from the Scriptures. The result is a book that resonates powerfully with our lives and invites us to become better versions of ourselves." (Julia T. Wood, Lineberger Distinguished Professor of Humanities, Emerita, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill)

About this edition

• Publisher: IVP
• Publication date: 2014
• ISBN 10: 0830844163
• ISBN 13: 9780830844166
• Binding: Paperback
• Number of pages: 224