A journal of one woman's descent into the hell of severe, crippling, deforming Rheumatoid Arthritis; her successes-turned-to-failures with conventional treatments - gold salts injections, penicillamine, Oraflex, methotrexate, joint replacement, bone resections, tendon transplants, etc. - and her return to normal living through sustained successes with alternative treatments including fasting, homeopathy, acupuncture, and others.
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Sunday, February 9, 1992 I can't believe it!!! I have almost no pain! After only a little over 48 hours fasting! I've had no gold salts injections for nearly three months now, no methotrexate for eleven days, no aspirin for five days, and at this moment I have virtually no pain. Hallelujah!
Sunday, November 20, 1994 The good news is I can write and I can type and I can earn my living better than at any time since 1978. I can cook and clean; I can even sew, something I wasn't able to do for quite a few years. My hands look as if they've been through a war, as they have been, but they serve me well and I'm grateful. I can walk and I'm stronger every day. I'm no longer frail in any sense.
Sunday, January 1, 1995 I can hardly believe there are so many types of alternative medicine; I've read descriptions of osteopathic manipulation, chiropractic, ayurveda, massage and polarity therapies, yoga, psychosynthesis, qi gong, oxygen therapy, water therapy, urine therapy (!), multi-wave oscillator therapy, radiobiology, bee venom and chelation therapies, iridology and reflexology, electromedicine and radionics, music therapy and cymatics and microwave resonance therapy, fever therapy and humor therapy, and the purported miraculous properties of pycnogenols, DMSO (dimethl sulfoxide) and DHEA (dehydroepiandrosterone). I've seen laundry lists of dozens more.
If I were choosing only among the therapies I've used recently, I'd choose homeopathy because I know that continued use of only part of the B vitamin complex can induce a deficiency of other B vitamins since they work synergistically and must be present simultaneously in appropriate ratios. Herbal remedies are less convenient and sometimes slower-acting.
It would probably be more efficient for me to work again with an experienced practitioner but I'd still like to see if I can find my way for myself. Although I realize it's possible to disorder my case if I choose the wrong remedies, the worst that can happen is that I will lose all the ground I've gained and will have to start again. Since homeopathic remedies are not dangerous in themselves, amateur experimentation with lower potency remedies is not dangerous in the same sense that experimenting with conventional prescription medications or even over-the-counter preparations would be.
In my experience, treating RA with alternative methods is not only much more effective but far less expensive. The cost of homeopathic remedies is almost negligible and even consultations are less costly than allopathic consultation. It's most certainly less expensive to my insurance carrier, which continues to accept my monthly premium payments and pays out nothing for the effective treatment of my most serious problem, yet stands ready to pay out thousands and thousands if I decide to change to conventional, and ineffectual treatment.
RA has changed from a debilitating disease to an annoying one now that I no longer fear that I'll be unable to function well enough to sustain my life. I came close enough to the profound debility I feared; for years I felt as if I were living on the brink of disaster. Now it's difficult to recall the terror of not being certain as certain as anyone can be that I would be able to take care of myself and meet my commitment to my children.
Consider how far I have come in the last three years. Cortisone enabled me to visit California but fasting and homeopathy enabled me to visit Madison, to move to California, to visit Portland and Tulsa and Tacoma. Homeopathy, herbs, acupuncture, and better nutrition enabled me to become stronger, then to start walking. Walking has enabled me to grow even stronger and to walk even farther. The more I've done, the more I've been able to do.
Thursday, December 28, 1995 If depression is anger turned inward, then RA is fear turned inward. Every day I realize more that a person governed by fear must learn to be bold, brave, and courageous, and must invent, create, imagine, the courage to confront her dragons. I realize that she must at last discover for herself that most dragons are toothless, but that it is better to be slain in combat with a dragon than to live, begging for mercy, flashing the soft pink underbelly of RA or any other offspring of fear.
The dilemma is how to confront the dragon. Allopathy does battle by throwing rocks, by tossing broken glass, by using noxious chemicals, by knife attacks, but ends up by harming only the victim because the dragon RA is itself an illusion, an effect, a miasma, a figment of who knows whom or what. Naturopathy defends by fortifying with food and supplements. Homeopathy stimulates by mimicking the disease process. Acupuncture prods and goads into health.
Sunday, September 1, 1996 My struggle with RA has not happened in a vacuum. It happened alongside and intertwined with family and philosophical and religious and spiritual crises as well as occupational struggles and discontent. In true chicken-or-egg fashion, I don't know which came first but I've always known that all my problems and challenges were inter-related. In 1992, I chose to be courageous. In 1992, I made myself courageous. I defied the authorities. I tried another way of treating my disease and succeeded.
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