Change How You See, Not How You Look: Power Tools for Celebrating Your Body - Softcover

Hilber, J. Alison

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1553693418 ISBN 13: 9781553693413

Publisher: Trafford Publishing, 2006

Synopsis

This is a book about choices and the tools to help women make the ones that suit our own higher purpose, no matter what we look like. It's a process toward self-love and acceptance just as we are.

About this title

About the Author

    J. Alison Hilber has a B.A. in Transpersonal Psychology from Burlington College, and is dedicated to helping women on the path to joyous celebration of their bodies through her Change How You See, Not How You Look Body Celebration Workshops for Women and this book. Alison lives in Burlington, Vermont, with her cat, Psyche, who is a daily reminder of the delights of having a soft, round belly.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

From Goddess to Victim

The most important beauty secret is to remember you are already beautiful.

   Bobbi Brown, Makeup Artist

    The dictionary describes FAT in many ways. Indeed, one set of definitions is "obesity, corpulence; unnecessary excess." What you might not know is that the majority of the definitions are along these lines: "the best or richest part; abounding in desirable elements; fertile or productive; rich; lucrative; prosperous; wealthy." Clearly, the word fat needs a new public relations agent. How have we managed to twist the "best or richest" into something so terrifying that some of us are willing to die rather than be it?

    It is a rare woman who doesn't or hasn't disliked her body, no matter what size she is. And how could she not. Daily, we are blasted with messages from all directions-magazines, television, billboards, movies, neighbors, friends, family - that we can't be happy if we don't change x y z about our body or appearance. Body image becomes an increasingly fragile element in our lives that begins taking up an enormous amount of our energy, not to mention our dollars.

    So, what exactly is "body image"? Is it just our physical size, weight, ability? Does it encompass also the ways in which wemove in the world, our posture, how our bodies are adorned, what we feel comfortable doing, where we are comfortable being? It is all this, and more. It can be about our hair color, our height, our ethnicity, our sexual orientation, our age, our physical ability, our skin color, the tilt of our nose, the width of our mouth, the straightness of our teeth ... as well, of course, as the size, shape and texture of our hips, thighs, breasts, hands, waist, toes, butts, ears, necks or heads!

    As with all of life, body image is about perception: how we perceive ourselves, how society perceives us, how others perceive us, and how we perceive others perceiving us. For women, physical appearance and self-esteem are almost inextricably connected, and most of us in this culture struggle with various body image issues, even those who actually represent society's feminine "ideal." We are not thin enough, not pretty enough, not fit enough ... not good enough. By internalizing these messages, we have learned to ignore our own beauty, our own worth, our own uniqueness in the Universe. Our self - esteem becomes intimately entwined with our self-image and, in this society, that image is almost always found lacking and in need of improvement. Our souls are depleted and our lives become limited.     One thing we can always count on is that, no matter what other appearance issues we may have, the perception of being fat will always carry the biggest stigma. It invokes the most dreaded fears. Most women would rather die than be fat ... and many do. Incidences of eating disorders in the U.S. are skyrocketing and girls as young as nine years old are already dieting.     Continuing to be a victim of the cultural paradigm of thinness - above-all-else requires your cooperation. Moving out of victimhood requires taking responsibility for yourself. This process is about becoming aware and conscious of your choices and deciding for yourself who you want to be in the world. The bottom line is unconditional, unadulterated self-love. Hating your body desecrates the temple you live in and is the antithesis of self-love, which is the most essential element to health, joyand spiritual growth. Once you begin that journey, you won't believe the incredibly wonderful ways you will define yourself. Your job, then, is to forget the external forces for a while and go inside yourself. You must begin gathering the pieces of your scattered self and bring them back together, allowing them to work together to remind you of your own perfection in every moment.

POWER TOOL:

REPEAT AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE:

I Am Already Beautiful!

In Praise Of...

    I had the privilege of being a "first reader" of Change How You See, Not How You Look: Power Tools for Celebrating Your Body, which reflects the compassion, humor, honesty, practicality, and spirituality that is Alison. It is a refreshing and empowering look at the many ways each one of us can lovingly take responsibility for our bodies, our spirits, our relationships and our society. Alison's Power Tools are sensible and intuitive ways to make affirming changes in our attitudes and beliefs,not in our thighs and bellies. It made me want to plaster my house with mantras and shout "I am a goddess!" when I glimpse myself naked in the mirror!

Meghan O 'Brien McDermott,Director,"Reflections"

Branford, Connecticut

    Alison is one of the few people who seem to really understand the connections between mind, body, and spirit. In her book, Change How You See, Not How You Look: Power Tools for Celebrating Your Body, she explores this connection with a real sense of how it fits into real life. She practices her spiritual approach on a daily basis...When I tell her about my life, she's truly present. This approach is evident in her life's work - her book and workshops - which is to help each of us follow our paths in our own special ways.

Cybčle Elaine Werts,Columnist

Hinesburg, Vermont

Alison's ability to articulate her own self-awareness and spirituality comes shining through in her workshops.I came away with a newly heightened awareness of what it meant to be me and the power to reaffirm my intentions and hold that momentum. I highly recommend Alison's workshop as a safe, trusting, nurturing and unconditionally loving place to explore one's whole presence - body, mind and spirit.

Suzanne Ruse, Director, The Center of Well Being

Saxtons River, Vermont

About this edition

• Publisher: Trafford Publishing
• Publication date: 2006
• ISBN 10: 1553693418
• ISBN 13: 9781553693413
• Binding: Paperback
• Number of pages: 140