Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World: Finding Intimacy With God in the Busyness of Life - Softcover

Weaver, Joanna

Softcover

ISBN 10: 1578562589 ISBN 13: 9781578562589

Publisher: The Crown Publishing Group, 2000

Synopsis

With nearly a million copies sold, Joanna Weaver's popular book shows women how to blend intimacy with Jesus and service for Him. 

An invitation for every woman who feels she isn't godly enough... isn't loving enough... isn't doing enough. The life of a woman today isn't really all that different from that of Mary and Martha in the New Testament. Like Mary, you long to sit at the Lord's feet... but the daily demands of a busy world just won't leave you alone. Like Martha, you love Jesus and really want to serve him... yet you struggle with weariness, resentment, and feelings of inadequacy.

Then comes Jesus, right into the midst of your busy Mary/Martha life-and he extends the same invitation he issued long ago to the two sisters of Bethany. Tenderly he invites you to choose "the better part"-a joyful life of "living-room" intimacy with him that flows naturally into "kitchen service" for him.

How can you make that choice? With her fresh approach to the familiar Bible story and its creative, practical strategies, Joanna shows how all of us -Marys and Marthas alike- can draw closer to our Lord, deepening our devotion, strengthening our service, and doing both with less stress and greater joy.

This book includes a twelve-week Bible study.

Also look for the ten-week DVD study pack companion product to this book, which includes three DVDs and a separate, revised and expanded study guide.

About this title

About the Author:

Joanna Weaver is the best-selling author of Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World, Having a Mary Spirit, Lazarus Awakening, and the award-winning gift book With This Ring. Her articles have appeared in such publications as Focus on the Family, Guideposts, and HomeLife. Joanna and her pastor-husband, John, have three children and live in Montana. Visit her website at www.JoannaWeaverBooks.com.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.:

Chapter 1: A Tale of Two Sisters

As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said.
LUKE 10 : 3 8 - 3 9

Have you ever tried to do it all?

I have, I do, and I probably always will. It’s not only in my nature; it’s also inmy job description—and yours, too. Being a woman requires more stamina,more creativity, and more wisdom than I ever dreamed as a young girl. Andthat’s not just true for today’s busy women. It has always been the case.

In 1814, Martha Forman was married to a wealthy Maryland plantationowner. You might expect she spent her days sipping tea, being fitted for lovelygowns, and giving orders to her servants as she chatted with important guests.Instead, Martha worked right beside her servants from four in the morning toeleven o’clock at night. Among her daily activities were the following:

Making thirty to thirty-four pounds of old tallow into candles; cuttingout fourteen shirts, jackets or trousers...; knitting stockings; washing;dyeing and spinning wool; baking mince pies and potato puddings;sowing wheat or reaping it; killing farm animals and salting the meat;planting or picking fruits and vegetables; making jams, jellies, and preserves with her fruit; helping whitewash or paint walls; ironing;preparing for large parties; caring for the sick....1

So, what did you do today? You may not have slaughtered a hog or harvestedwheat, but I know you were busy. Whether you were out selling real estate or athome kissing boo-boos (or both), your day passed just as quickly. And yourmind and body are probably as tired as poor Martha Forman’s as you steal a fewmoments to spend with this book.

Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World. The thought intrigues you. Deepinside of you there is a hunger, a calling, to know and love God. To truly knowJesus Christ and the fellowship of the Spirit. You’re not after more head knowledge—it’s heart-to-heart intimacy you long for.

Yet a part of you hangs back. Exhausted, you wonder how to find thestrength or time. Nurturing your spiritual life seems like one more duty—onemore thing to add to a life that is spilling over with responsibilities.

It’s almost as if you’re standing on the bottom rung of a ladder that stretchesup to heaven. Eager but daunted, you name the rungs with spiritual things youknow you should do: study the Bible, pray, fellowship...

“He’s up there somewhere,” you say, swaying slightly as you peer upward,uncertain how to begin or if you even want to attempt the long, dizzy climb. Butto do nothing means you will miss what your heart already knows: There is moreto this Chris tian walk than you’ve experienced. And you’re just hungryenough—just desperate enough—to want it all.

A TALE OF TWO SISTERS

Perhaps no passage of Scripture better describes the conflict we feel as womenthan the one we find in the gospel of Luke. Just mention the names Mary andMartha around a group of Chris tian women and you’ll get knowing looks andnervous giggles. We’ve all felt the struggle. We want to worship like Mary, butthe Martha inside keeps bossing us around.

Here’s a refresher course in case you’ve forgotten the story. It’s found in Luke.It’s the tale of two sisters. It’s the tale of you and me.

As Jesus and his dis ciples were on their way, he came to a village wherea woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sistercalled Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. ButMartha was distracted by all the prep ara tions that had to be made. Shecame to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left meto do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”

“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upsetabout many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosenwhat is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (10:38-42)

A MARTHA WORLD

When I read the first part of Mary and Martha’s story, I must admit I find myselfcheering for Martha. I know we tend to sing Mary’s praises in Bible studies. ButMartha, to be honest, appeals more to my perfectionist tendencies.

What a woman! She opens her home to a band of thirteen hungry men, possiblymore. What a hostess! She doesn’t whip up an impromptu casserole of Kraftmacaroni and cheese and Ballpark franks as I’ve been known to do on oc ca -sion. Not her! She is the original Martha Stewart, the New Testament’sProverbs 31 woman, and Israel’s answer to Betty Crocker. Or at least that’s theway I imagine her. She’s the Queen of the Kitchen—and the rest of the house aswell.

And Luke’s story starts with Martha in her glory. After all, this is Jesus. Shescraps her ordinary everyday menu of soup and bread and pulls out all her cookbooks.This, she decides, will be a banquet fit for a messiah. For the Messiah.Martha sends one servant to the field to slaughter a lamb, another to the marketto pick up a few of those luscious pomegranates she saw yesterday. Like a militarygeneral, she barks commands to her kitchen staff. Soak the lentils! Poundthe grain! Knead the dough!

So many things to do and so little time. She must make sure the centerpieceand the napkins match, that the servant pours the wine from the right and notthe left. Martha’s mind is as busy as a room filled with kindergartners. What would be just right for dessert? A little goat cheese with a tray of fresh fruit? WillJesus and his followers stay overnight? Someone must change the sheets and foldsome towels.

“Where’s Mary? Has anyone seen Mary?” she asks a servant scurrying by. IfMary changed the sheets, Martha might have time to fashion an ark from thecheese and carve the fruit into little animals marching two by two. Productionsof this magnitude require the skill of a master planner. And Martha’s an administratorextraordinaire—a whirling dervish of efficiency, with a touch ofTasmanian she-devil thrown in to motivate the servants.

I happen to be the oldest in my family. Perhaps that’s why I understand howfrustrated Martha must have felt when she finally found Mary. The entire householdis in an uproar, busy making ready to entertain the most famous teacher oftheir day, the man most likely to become the next king of Israel. I can relate tothe anger that boils up inside of Martha at the sight of her lazy sibling sitting atthe Master’s feet in the living room.

It’s simply too much. With everything still left to do, there sits little Mary,being quite contrary, crashing a party meant only for men. But worse, she seemsoblivious to all of Martha’s gesturing from the hall.

Martha tries clearing her throat. She even resorts to her most effective tool:the “evil eye,” famous for stopping grown men in their tracks. But nothing shedoes has any effect on her baby sister. Mary only has eyes for Jesus.

Pushed to the limit, Martha does something unprecedented. She interruptsthe boys’ club, certain that Jesus will take her side. After all, a woman’s place is inthe kitchen. Her sister, Mary, should be helping prepare the meal.

Martha realizes there is a cutting edge to her voice, but Jesus will understand.He, of all people, knows what it’s like to carry the weight of the world.

Now of course, you won’t find all that in the Bible. Luke tends to downplaythe whole story, dedicating only four verses to an event that was destined tochange Martha’s life forever. And mine as well. And yours, if you will let thesimple truth of this passage soak deep into your heart.

Instead of applauding Martha, Jesus gently rebukes her, telling her Mary haschosen “what is better.” Or, as another translation puts it, “Mary has chosen thebetter part” (NRSV).

“The better part?” Martha must have echoed incredulously.

“The better part!” I say to God in the midst of my own whirl of activity.“You mean there’s more? I have to do more?”

No, no, comes the answer to my tired heart. Jesus’ words in Luke 10 areincredibly freeing to those of us on the performance treadmill of life.

It isn’t “more” he requires of us.

In fact, it may be less.

A MARY HEART

The Bible doesn’t tell us a lot about Mary and Martha. They are mentioned byname only three times in Scripture: Luke 10:38-42, John 11:1-44, and John12:1-11. But from these brief accounts, a fascinating picture develops of what lifemust have been like at the house in Bethany—and what life is often like for us.

They say variety is the spice of life. Perhaps that’s why God so often putspeople of such different personalities in the same family. (Either that, or he’s tryingto prepare us for marriage!) Mary was the sunlight to Martha’s thunder. Shewas the caboose to Martha’s locomotive. Mary’s bent was to meander throughlife, pausing to smell the roses. Martha was more likely to pick the roses, quicklycut the stems at an angle, and arrange them in a vase with baby’s breath andferns.

That is not to say one is right and one is wrong. We are all different, and thatis just as God made us to be. Each gifting and personality has its own strengthsand weaknesses, its glories and temptations.

I find it interesting that when Jesus corrected Martha, he didn’t say, “Whycan’t you be more like your sister, Mary?” He knew Martha would never beMary, and Mary would never be Martha. But when the two were faced with thesame choice—to work or to worship—Jesus said, “Mary has chosen the betterpart.”

To me, this implies the Better Part was available to both Mary and Martha.And it’s available to each one of us, regardless of our gifting or personality. It’s achoice we each can make.

It is true that, personality-wise, the choice may have come easier to Marythan it did to Martha. Mary does seem more mellow by nature, more prone towalk in the dew of the morning than to get caught up in the “dos” of the day.

I’m sure when Jesus dropped by unexpectedly that afternoon, Mary probablybegan the visit by serving, just as she had many times before. I can see hertaking walking staffs and sleeping rolls as the dis ciples spill into her sister’s wellorderedhome. Buried beneath cloaks and backpacks, she watches the man whohas taken the heart of Israel captive by his words. There is such joy and winsomenessabout him, she can’t help but be drawn to this man.

Could Jesus be the Messiah the people say he is? Mary wonders. She knowshe’s a great teacher, but could this actually be the Son of God admiring the tapestryshe wove, drawing her out of her shyness and into the circle of his closestfriends?

She drops the dis ciples’ belongings in a corner and hurries to pour wine forthe thirsty crew. There is an ease about them, a true camaraderie. The men laughat each other’s jokes as they wash down the dust of the road with the liquid sheprovides. Then they settle on low couches around the room, and Jesus begins toteach.

He speaks as none she ever heard before. There is a magnetism about hiswords, as though they contain breath and life—breath and life Mary hasn’tknown she needed until this day. She creeps closer and stands in a dark cornerlistening to Jesus, her arms wrapped around the empty pitcher.

She’s aware of movement around her. Several servants busy themselves washingdirty feet, while another sets the table at the other end of the room for themeal to come. Mary knows there is plenty to do. And yet she is unable tomove—except closer.

It isn’t customary for a woman to sit with a group of men, but his words welcomeher. Despite her natural reticence, she gradually moves forward until she’skneeling at his feet. His teaching envelops her, revealing truth to her hungryheart.

The Bible isn’t clear whether or not this was Jesus’ first visit to the home inBethany. Martha’s openness with Christ seems to indicate a prior acquaintance,but whatever the case, this day Mary chose to let someone else do the serving soshe could do some listening. It isn’t every day God visits your house. So sheignores tradition, she breaks social etiquette, and she presses closer. As close toJesus as possible.

It doesn’t matter that she might be misunderstood. She cares little that the dis ciples look at her strangely. Somewhere in the distance she hears her name,but it is drowned by the call of her Master. The call to come. The call to listen.

And listen she does.

TALE OF EVERY WOMAN

Against this Bethany backdrop of unexpected guests, I see the struggle I faceevery day when work and worship collide.

Part of me is Mary. I want to worship extravagantly. I want to sit at his feet.

But part of me is Martha—and there’s just so much to do!

So many legitimate needs surround me, compelling me to work. I hearGod’s tender call to come away, and I respond, “Yes, Lord, I will come.” Butthen the phone rings, or I’m reminded of the check I was supposed to deposit—yesterday. Suddenly all of my good intentions about worship disappear, swallowedup by what Charles Hummel calls “the tyranny of the urgent.”

“We live in constant tension between the urgent and the important,”Hummel writes. “The problem is that the important task rarely must be donetoday or even this week. Extra hours of prayer and Bible study can wait. But theurgent tasks call for instant action—endless demands pressure every hour andday.”2

Does that sound familiar? It does to me. The twenty-four hours allotted toeach day rarely stretch far enough to meet all the obligations I face. I have ahousehold to run, a husband to love, children to care for, and a dog to feed. Ihave church commitments, writing deadlines, lunch engagements to keep. Andvery little of this is what I would call deadwood. Long ago I tried to cut out whatI thought was extraneous. This is my life—and the hours are packed full.

Not long ago, Today’s Chris tian Woman magazine sponsored a survey of morethan a thousand Chris tian women. Over 60 percent indicated they work full timeoutside the home.3 Add housework and errands to a forty-hour-a-week career,and you have a recipe for weariness. Women who choose to stay at home findtheir lives just as full. Chasing toddlers, carpooling to soccer, volunteering atschool, baby-sitting the neighbor kids—life seems hectic at every level.

So where do we find the time to follow Mary to the feet of Jesus? Where dowe find the energy to serve him?

How do we choose the Better Part and still get done what really has to getdone?

Jesus is our supreme example. He was never in a hurry. He knew who he wasand where he was going. He wasn’t held hostage to the world’s demands or evenits desperate needs. “I only do what the Father tells me to do,” Jesus told his dis -ciples.

Someone has said that Jesus went from place of prayer to place of prayer anddid miracles in between. How incredible to be so in tune with God that not oneaction is wasted, not one word falls to the ground!

That is the intimacy that Jesus invites us to share. He invites us to knowhim, to see him so clearly that when we look upon him, we see the face of God aswell.

Just as he welcomed Mary to sit at his feet in the living room, just as heinvited Martha to leave the kitchen for a whil...

About this edition

• Publisher: The Crown Publishing Group
• Publication date: 2000
• ISBN 10: 1578562589
• ISBN 13: 9781578562589
• Binding: Paperback
• Number of pages: 256