Healing the Heart of Conflict: 8 Crucial Steps to Making Peace with Yourself and Others - Hardcover

Gopin, Marc

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 1579547931 ISBN 13: 9781579547936

Publisher: Rodale Books, 2004

Synopsis

Rabbi and international mediator Marc Gopin presents an 8-step process-based on great religious traditions, philosophy, and psychology-for healing even the most destructive, and seemingly intractable, conflicts.

For more than 20 years Marc Gopin has sought to resolve bitter disputes in a variety of domestic and international settings. What he has learned-working for peace in sticky world trouble spots such as the Middle East and Northern Ireland, or helping his congregants through the business and personal conflicts that can destroy lives-is that some conflicts, rooted in the deepest, most primal emotions, cannot be solved by "rational" discussion and negotiation. Instead the answer lies along a path of self-examination and spiritual growth.

In his new book, Marc Gopin details a process that will help people free themselves from the soul-poisoning effects of destructive conflict. The 8 steps he describes teach us how to: examine our inner lives so that our character becomes a true ally of healing; pay close attention to the power of our emotions and those of others in conflict; understand the dynamics of what is really going on in difficult situations; truly listen to others in new ways; view troubled relationships from a fresh perspective; imagine creative possibilities that no one dared see; take powerful action that completely transforms hopeless situations; and speak in a way that uses the power of the word not to injure but to heal and create new realities.

Serious and profound, beautifully written and sorely needed, this book can lead anyone to a healing of the heart that works equally well in the family, professional, and geopolitical spheres.

About this title

About the Author

Marc Gopin, a leading scholar of religion and diplomacy, is a senior researcher at the Institute for Human Security at the Fletcher School of Law and Diplomacy at Tufts University. Rabbi Gopin has trained professionals from 25 countries and every major religion in the art of conflict resolution. He has worked with several presidential administrations, teaching conflict resolution to diplomats and military officers concerning the Middle East, Northern Ireland and Africa. His books include Between Eden and Armageddon and Violence and Peacemaking. He lives in Fairfax, Virginia.

Review

“Gopin's guide transcends many self-help books by drawing on his two decades of experience in the field of conflict resolution worldwide, including the Middle East, Northern Ireland and Africa. Through his work and understanding of the dynamics and stages of international conflict, Gopin, a rabbi and director of the Center for World Religions, Diplomacy, and Conflict Resolution at George Mason University, has learned how the same tools and approaches can be used to address and resolve day-to-day conflicts in business and personal relationships. "Destructive conflicts," he writes, "are based on primal emotions and cannot be solved by rational discussion and negotiation." They call, instead, for addressing and healing feelings of dishonor and humiliation, which in turn requires "self-examination and spiritual growth." Using wide-ranging anecdotes, Gopin presents eight primary steps, including recognizing the emotions at the heart of conflict, learning how to listen to all sides of an issue, setting goals that represent the future needs and desires of all parties and keeping dialogue open and ongoing. He illustrates how these principles can be applied in work situations, within family relationship and in local community dynamics. Gopin (Holy Way, Holy Peace) addresses how differences in politics, religion, gender, race and personal beliefs can serve as catalysts for conflict and how one might approach delicate situations with understanding so that opportunity for conflict is reduced. Though the eight steps are summarized with simple words (Feel, Understand, Hear, etc.), Gopin's solution is not a simple or easy one-but it is psychologically and spiritually grounded, compassionate and compelling.” —Publisher's Weekly, September 13, 2004

“Someone a long time ago-it may have been Voltaire-said, 'What you are speaks with such force that I cannot hear what you say.' Dr. Marc Gopin understands this on a deep level. In Healing the Heart of Conflict, he shows us how to be to foster peace in our lives. You hold in your hand a blueprint for hope.” —U.S. Representative Amo Houghton, Congressional Delegate to the United Nations under President George W. Bush

“[Healing the Heart of Conflict is] an accessible and fascinating behind-the-curtain exposé of the very nature of dispute. With relevant examples from pop culture to the late-night streets of a war zone, Marc's contribution with this book is his clear and high regard for the truth, and his uncommonly intuitive understanding of people-why we do what we do. His re-telling of one intimate exchange with Yasser Arafat is enough to bring us all to that aching point of knowing or believing that even the most impossible of conflicts offer moments, however fleeting, when progress is possible, and listening is essential. . . . Men like Marc Gopin need to be heard.” —Dick Gordon, host of The Connection on National Public Radio

About this edition

• Publisher: Rodale Books
• Publication date: 2004
• ISBN 10: 1579547931
• ISBN 13: 9781579547936
• Binding: Hardcover
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 352