Blessings of Being Mortal: How a Mature Understanding of Death Can Free Us to Live Wisely and Well - Softcover

Drummond, Margo

Softcover

ISBN 10: 188082325X ISBN 13: 9781880823255

Publisher: North Star Pubns, 2001

Synopsis

One hundred years from today, each of us, at best, will be a photograph, perhaps a name on a grave marker, or a mention in some obscure family history. Until then, why not be happy, while the chance to do so is still ours.

Accepting the fact that we are going to die generates an acute awareness of the need to live in the present, says Margo Drummond in her book Blessings of Being Mortal. The realization that time will not return allows us to avoid regrets over an irretrievable past and longing for an uncertain future. Blessings of Being Mortal offers any thoughtful individual the opportunity to consider his or her feelings about issues of mortality. It is written to foster personal reflection on the belief that a mature understanding of death frees us to live wisely and well.

Our own human mortality is clearly the most difficult and inescapable fact of life with which we struggle. In our guts, we know that we are no less than mortal. Such certitude creates conflict within us and that conflict has an impact on the quality of our lives.

Rather than confronting our certain fate, human beings more often choose to deny it. We attempt to distance death by deluding ourselves into believing that, if not youth and beauty, then surely power and possessions can somehow insulate us from "non-being." Failing that, there must exist some technological wonder to rescue us. Ironically, technological wonders may rob us of final choice or control over how we die, exacting the ultimate price for our denial. If stricken with a terminal illness, most of us feel certain that we would know what we would and would not want in terms of treatment, care and end-of-life measures.

While the prospect of pain and suffering may terrify us, we assume that somehow we will be allowed to die with dignity. Yet an ongoing dialogue about such quandaries seldom takes place.

If the so-called "good death" is what we seek, we must first determine what that means for us personally and then take measures to facilitate the likelihood of its occurring.

And, following death, do we care not at all, only slightly, or in a profound way about issues of autopsy, embalming, visitation, the funeral/memorial service, and how our remains are treated? There are a myriad of choices to consider, including the customs of other cultures. By comparing and contrasting such traditions and outlooks with those of our own, we gain focus over what makes sense personally regarding how to live and how to die.

Insight and inspiration on human death are uniquely individual. Cemeteries may act as one source, providing a tangible setting for reflection upon that most intangible of human needs: the need to revisit the dead. Maintaining that link between the living and the dead is an important part of the process of grieving; is an attempt to lessen the impact of being without a presence on which we have so relied. Described as the most difficult emotional work we are ever asked to do, grieving affects every aspect of our well-being. However enveloping, the impact of grief can be lessened by seeing to it that relationships for which we may one day grieve remain as free as possible of "might-have-beens."

Integrating the realities of death into an awareness of what it means to be alive ends in a logical conclusion: that life is a gift soon taken from us.

About this title

About the Author

Margo Drummond is both a student and teacher who seeks to educate others on the meanings and consequences of human death.

For the past 25 years, Ms. Drummond has instructed more than 2,000 high school and post-high school students in the course she developed, "Death and Dying–Issues of Living and Life." During that time, she met with and gathered resource information from those who deal with death on a daily basis–medical providers, rescue squads and police personnel, medical examiners, funeral directors, therapists, religious leaders, and hospice caregivers.

Her interest in the death rituals and belief systems of other cultures began with a year spent in Hawaii living among Asian (Buddhist) peoples. Since then, Ms. Drummond has visited cemeteries, mortuaries, and death-related sights in 49 U.S. States, Canada, Mexico, Burma, China, Japan, Thialand, Singapore, Hong Kong, Macao, Egypt, Morocco, Turkey, Greece, Scandinavia, Russia, the British Isles, and most of Europe. An invitation from the Ministry of Culture of France to visit the 17,000 year-old caves at Lascaux for research on prehistoric death interpretations allowed the author to further enrich her understanding of the timelessness of this topic.

For the past decade, Ms. Drummond has served as a commissioner of a cemetery containing two thousand year-old Native American burial mounds. Her extensive knowledge of issues regarding burial and disinterrment, entombment and cremation, cemetery care and restoration, as well as cemetery history are an outcome of this tenure. She has written numerous newspaper articles and character sketches related to historic Mound Cemetery, where she conducts archaeological and historic walking tours.

Review

"...rich with details and insights. Shares the way a good, but knowledgeable, friend would over a cup of coffee at the kitchen table." -- Richard Kenyon, Former Book Editor, Milwaukee Journal

"Outstanding book - It does not paint any false pictures of [either the] choices we face or what someone will go through after losing a loved one." -- Kevin Wheeller, Sec-Treasurer , Arizona State Funeral Directors

"This book humanizes dying, and...an important source of information for individuals ..., either from an academic or a personal point of view." -- E. Darracott Vaughan, Jr., M.D., New York Presbyterian Hospital, Chairman, Urology, Weill Cornell Medical College

"This is a readable and provocative book!" -- Larry McMurtry, Author, Lonesome Dove

About this edition

• Publisher: North Star Pubns
• Publication date: 2001
• ISBN 10: 188082325X
• ISBN 13: 9781880823255
• Binding: Paperback
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 166