Across the Kitchen Table: A Mother and Daughter Turn Tragedy into Peace

For readers suffering from family estrangement or hoping to repair broken familial bonds, this mother-daughter memoir, written in a unique letter format, touches on the timely theme of politically divided families.  

Fans of Jennette McCurdy’s I’m Glad My Mom Died will love this true story of a damaged primal bond between mother and daughter that, after decades of estrangement, was finally repaired. The conflict began when Carla, as a preteen, stepped in to defend her father against what she perceived as her mother’s harsh treatment—a move that destroyed the warm love she and her mother had for each other and began an “ice age” between them.

Forty years later, determined that this mother and daughter not end as tragedy, Carla uses every tool available to her—psychology, diplomacy, humanity, wit, patience—to try to repair their bond. Finally, over her mother’s kitchen table, they melt the ice and find their way back to laughter and closeness.

Too often today, problem relationships are labeled “toxic,” with the idea it is “healing” to offload a relationship no longer serving you. This loving, grounded memoir shows that rebuilding a primal bond is doable—and will prompt readers to ask themselves, Could I do the same? What if I reached out, today?

Carla Seaquist (1944-2024) was an author and playwright who focused her commentary after the 9/11 attacks on politics, culture, and ethical-moral issues. Venues for her commentary have been (in order) The Christian Science Monitor, HuffPost, and Medium. Two volumes of her collected commentary—Can America Save Itself from Decline?—have been published, with Volume III due out Spring 2025. Her first book is titled, Manufacturing Hope: Post-9/11 Notes on Politics, Culture, Torture, and the American Character. Renowned investigative reporter Seymour Hersh calls Seaquist “an essayist in the great American tradition.” 

Her play Who Cares?: The Washington-Sarajevo Talks, based on her calls with a man under siege in Sarajevo, received its premiere at Chicago’s Victory Gardens Theater, with subsequent productions at Washington’s Studio Theatre and the Festival of Emerging American Theater. This play, along with Kate and Kafka, was published as Two Plays of Life and Death.

 Seaquist’s early career was in civil rights. She organized the women’s caucus at the Brookings Institution, Washington, DC, and served as Equal Opportunity Officer for the City of San Diego, for which she received NOW’s Susan B. Anthony award. She served on the California Governor’s Task Force on Civil Rights and the board of Humanities Washington. Majoring in international relations, Seaquist earned a BA, cum laude, from American University’s School of International Service and pursued an MA at Johns Hopkins School of Advanced International Studies, with one year in Bologna, Italy. She was married to Larry Seaquist, a retired US Navy captain and former Washington state legislator, now an educator and writer. After long-time residence in Washington, DC, she and Larry returned to live and work in Gig Harbor in “the other Washington.  

Her work is archived on her website, www.carlaseaquist.com.