If Only You Would Ask: A Guide to Spending Quality Time with the Elderly

What started as a resource for caregivers has also become a great resource in countless other settings including ESL Classes, Hospice, Family Gatherings, Table Talk, and Grandparents Day!

When visiting an elderly relative or friend, are you often at a loss for what to talk about? After the initial pleasantries, do the minutes drag on? You may very well love this person, but find yourself struggling to carry on a conversation. An hour can seem endless. If only you could think of something interesting to talk about!

If Only You Would Ask transforms this situation! Open to any page and soon find yourself engaged in meaningful conversation.

With forty-two topics and over four hundred questions, If Only You Would Ask provides a framework for tapping into memories that may not have been thought about or talked about for years! You and the person you are visiting will both enjoy your time together. In fact, you will look forward to your next get together.

Every person has stories to share, If Only You Would Ask!

Author Bio

Mother-daughter duo Eileen Opatz Berger and Joan Berger Bachman teamed up for five years to make this timeless resource available for all those who spend time with the elderly.

Eileen Opatz Berger graduated from the College of St. Benedict and the University of Wisconson/River Falls. Along with her family, teaching international students was the joy of her life. Favorite pastimes included travel, writing, and tennis. Eileen had so much to share and so much to discover until the very last weeks of her life. She left this world on January 9, 2023. Not a day goes by that she isn’t sorely missed by the many who loved her. There were still questions to be asked! Mom often reminded Joan, “You know, these questions will never get old.” And she was right!

Joan Berger Bachman is extremely pleased and proud to have co-authored a book with her Mom! As a teenager, Joan recalls her mother’s advice: “When you are in a social situation, always make an effort to ask each person three questions. This shows that you are interested in what they have to say.” In other words, give people the opportunity to talk about themselves! Generally, people are pleased to share, and you will have deflected the attention from yourself! So, it came as no real surprise that four decades later, Joan co-authored a book filled with questions to promote quality conversations!

Joan resides with her husband John in Mahtomedi, Minnesota. Proud mother of three grown children and grandmother to seven, she is grateful for family, for health, and for friends who continue to enrich her life.

Eileen Opatz Berger graduated from the College of St. Benedict and the University of Wis/River Falls. Along with her family, teaching international students was the joy of her life.  Favorite pastimes included travel, writing and tennis.  Eileen had so much to share and. so much to discover until the very last weeks of her life.  She left this world on January. 9, 2023.  Not a day goes by that she isn't sorely missed by those who loved her. There were still questions to be asked.  Mom often remeninded Joan, "You know, these questions will never get old."  And she was right!

Joan Berger Bachman is extremely pleased and proud to have co-authored a book with her Mom.  As a teenager, Joan recalls her mother's advice:  "When you are in a social sistuation, always make an effort to ask each person three quesitons.  This shows that you are interested in what they have to say."  In othert words, give people the opportunity to talk about. themselves!  So, it came as no surprise that four decades later, Joan co-authored a book filled with questions to promote quality conversations. 
Joan resides with her husband John in Mahtomdedi, MN.  Proud mother of three grown children and grandmother to seven, she is grateful for family, for. health and for friends who continue to o enrich her life.