Compassionate Conversations: How to Speak and Listen from the Heart

The definitive guide to learning effective skills for engaging in open and honest conversations about divisive issues from three professional mediators.

When a conversation takes a turn into the sometimes uncomfortable and often contentious topics of race, religion, gender, sexuality, and politics, it can be difficult to know what to say or how to respond to someone you disagree with. Compassionate Conversations empowers us to transform these conversations into opportunities to bridge divides and mend relationships by providing the basic set of conflict resolution skills we need to be successful, including listening, reframing, and dealing with strong emotions. Addressing the long history of injury and pain for marginalized groups, the authors explore topics like social privilege, power dynamics, and, political correctness allowing us to be more mindful in our conversations. Each chapter contains practices and reflection questions to help readers feel more prepared to talk through polarizing issues, ultimately encouraging us to take risks, to understand and recognize our deep commonalities, to be willing to make mistakes, and to become more intimate with expressing our truths, as well as listening to those of others.

DIANE MUSHO HAMILTON is an award-winning professional mediator, author, and teacher of Zen meditation. She is the Executive Director of Two Arrows Zen, a practice in Utah, and cofounder of the Integral Facilitator, a training program oriented to personal development and advanced facilitator skills. She is the author of Everything Is Workable and The Zen of You and Me. Find out more at dianemushohamilton.com. 

GABRIEL MENEGALE WILSON is a leadership coach, organizational change consultant, and peace-builder with a specialty in diversity and inclusion efforts. He is a certified integral facilitator and an associate for Delta Developmental, a leadership and organizational development consultancy.

KIMBERLY MYOSAI LOH is a conflict resolution and negotiation specialist, leadership coach and co-author of Compassionate Conversations. She works with conscious leaders and teams to up-level their human relationships and transform conflicts into creative opportunities for growth. Devoted to the values of clarity and compassion, her past work includes peacebuilding and mediation research and advocacy for the United Nations, international NGOs and universities, and international arbitration and litigation work as a lawyer in London and Singapore. Find out more at kimberlyloh.com.