Confessions of a Raging Perfectionist

Amanda is a raging perfectionist. She begins each day with a long list. “Keep the house picked up; limit myself to two Diet Cokes; spend special time with each of the kids; work out; pray; avoid sugar; read a chapter in a book about something very important; read my Bible; call my mom.” She determines each day’s worth, and ultimately her own, by keeping track of her stats―pounds gained or lost, stuff accomplished.

That is, until God spoke into her life, waking her up to the true costs of her addiction to perfection. Confessions of a Raging Perfectionist is more than Amanda’s confession; it’s a journey of letting go of the subtle but destructive idols of her overactive inner voice and replacing them with God’s truth. Amanda hopes her journey can inspire others to let God dig in to their own lives, uncovering the subtle lies we unconsciously live by.

Minutes I spent working out: 45
Minutes I spent reading my Bible: 10
Number of kids who got my undivided attention: 2 outta 4
Number of rooms looking picture perfect: 2½
Number of Diet Cokes I drank to power through: 4


Eesh―room for improvement. Resolve to read longer, drink less caffeine, and clean more. And eat healthier. And call my mom twice a week. And finish what I start. And maintain what I finish. And . . .

I’m a raging perfectionist. A dent in my car drives me nuts, I don’t leave the house without mascara, and I hate it when my junk drawer isn’t organized. And I keep track of my Bridget Jones–style stats―pounds gained or lost, stuff accomplished, stuff not accomplished.

While on the surface those things are minor, at their root is my desire to be admired for being perfectly put together.

In the past few years, God has nudged me (more like shoved me) down a better road. Coming to terms with my addiction to perfection in all its forms has been exhausting, but freedom is on the horizon. The result? This book―a journal of sorts that tracks what I’ve been learning along the way.

I’m hoping my transparency will help pry away the things that have become my idols, loosening their grip on my heart and mind.

And I pray God will use my journey to further yours.