Ditch That Jerk : Dealing With Men Who Control and Hurt Women

The Potentially Good, The Definitely Bad, and the Utterly Hopeless...

If you know your husband or boyfriend is a good man, then this book isn’t for you. But if you’re not so sure, Ditch That Jerk will help you assess whether your partner could be controlling or abusive—and whether he’ll ever change. Author Pamela Jayne writes in a direct, honest style, and uses real-life examples to show how the mind of an abusive man works and how to recognize the men she characterizes as potentially good, definitely bad or utterly hopeless. Her book includes descriptions, examples, warnings—and even “jerk tests.” Should you ditch him? Here are a few of the indicators:

The Potentially Good Man (has the capacity to change)

• is likely to use non-physical forms of control and intimidation, such as verbal abuse
• is usually employed and doesn’t change jobs a lot or get fired regularly
• does not usually have a serious alcohol or other drug problem

The Definitely Bad Man (is unlikely to change)

• feels victimized by the world and blames everyone else for his problems
• is moody, creates chaos around him, and may isolate himself and his family
• may have a serious problem with alcohol or other drugs

The Utterly Hopeless Man (will never change—ditch him!)

• behaves violently, including toward animals, and totally lacks feelings and empathy
• is extremely dishonest, lying whenever it suits his purposes
• is charming and highly manipulative—often claiming to have reformed
  

If you’re with a man who is controlling or hurtful—or you want to help a woman who is—Ditch That Jerk is for you. Sensible and straightforward, this book can help women make potentially lifesaving decisions about their relationships.

Pamela Jayne, M.A., is a domestic violence expert who has worked in the field for more than 15 years. For the last ten years, she has been the director of an agency serving both victims and batterers. She has also chaired a program developing state standards for abuser programs, trains counselors, and delivers numerous presentations on the subject of domestic abuse.