The Ego Trip

A psychedelic guru, a magical toad and the dark side of the modern quest for transcendence.

'Entirely mesmerising . . . The Ego Trip is itself a trip' PATRICK RADDEN KEEFE
'A one-of-a-kind book. I loved it' WILLIAM FINNEGAN
'Strange and wonderful' SUSAN ORLEAN

In 2012, physician Octavio Rettig claimed he had revived a forgotten indigenous ritual: smoking the secretions of the Sonoran Desert toad, which releases a potent psychedelic substance known as 'the God molecule'. The experience promised ego death, communion with the divine and extraordinary relief for those suffering from PTSD, depression and drug addiction. As word spread, Octavio became the face of a global psychedelic movement, drawing seekers from around the world.

Yet as his fame grew, so did troubling reports of extreme dosing, abusive behaviour and a disturbing cult-like following. what began as a spiritual revival evolved into something far more dangerous.

In this gripping and deeply reported book, Kimon de Greef explores the promise and the peril of 'toad medicine'. Part true crime, part cult story, part investigative journalism, The Ego Trip chronicles the rise and fall of a self-made messianic figure while probing our relentless search for cosmic understanding.

Kimon de Greef's original coverage of Octavio Rettig appeared in a March 2022 print edition of The New Yorker. He is the recipient of the inaugural Ferriss-UC Berkeley Psychedelic Journalism Fellowship. Kimon's work has also appeared in the New York Times, the Guardian, Guernica, and National Geographic among others.