In the Failing Light: A Memoir

"In the Failing Light" is a mesmerizing, non-fiction account of a women coping with stage IV breast cancer, written from her husband's point of view. Relying heavily on dialogue, the book focuses on the love between the two, and the fight they endure to live together happily and healthily. "In the Failing Light" spares the reader no details and its tone is exquisite-by the end, you'll not only have fallen in love with the author's wife, you'll be thankful Mr. Tillman wrote this beautiful book.

Eloquent and heartbreaking, this is an account of the toll cancer took on the lives of the author and his wife, who recently died of the disease. Diagnosed with stage IV breast cancer shortly after the birth of her first child, Tillman's wife (whom the author does not name) spent the next six years trying every conceivable treatment, including a bone marrow transplant, to prolong her life. Although there have been other memoirs by a surviving spouse, what distinguishes this one is Tillman's candid emphasis on how he tried to deny the harsh reality of the disease that was killing his wife. Tillman refused to admit that she would not survive by repeating what would become his mantra, "You'll live to be a hundred," although his wife had accepted her coming death far earlier. He tells of how he, his wife and their daughter went on many vacations that they could not afford in order to steal time away from her painful treatments, and he details the now-familiar stories of financial pressures and occasional insensitivity shown by members of the medical community and others to their plight. This family tragedy highlights the harsh reality of an elusive disease that, as yet, has no certain cure. Illustrations not seen by PW.
Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc.

This is the story of Tillman and his wife and young daughter after his wife's diagnosis of Stage IV metastatic breast cancer. It is told through the husband's eyes, which is rare in a breast cancer narrative. In so doing, Tillman makes us all part of their journeyAand their nightmare. His sardonic wit colors most of the trauma of a late diagnosis, endless and varied treatments, indifferent medical and technical professionals, and his favorite nemesis, the insurance industry. Married late in life and parents of a nine-month-old daughter, the couple are originally told she would not survive long. "I'm going to die," she states. "You'll live to be a hundred," is his constant refrain. The family moves from Connecticut to Boston to be near more sophisticated medical technology, suffer bankruptcy, and go on vacation between rounds of chemo and radiation and bone marrow transplant and hormone therapy. The short-term prognosis becomes nearly seven years, years of pain and dashed hopes but also of dance recitals, school outings, and parent/teacher conferences. This is a marvelous story with a predictable but still wrenching conclusion. Men who love their wives and wives who may have taken their husbands for granted will see themselves on these pages. Beautifully written, this is highly recommended for all public libraries.ABette-Lee Fox, "Library Journal"
Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Tillman writes mostly in dialogue, from routine conversation to a couple's heartfelt exchanges of love and fear. After the wife is diagnosed with terminal cancer, the account of the couple's existence comes to stand for life itself. Nearly everything that can go wrong does. Doctors miss the early diagnosis, don't listen to the patient or her spouse, and sometimes treat her brutally. After the cancer enters her bones, her leg breaks from the resultant weakness. A paramedic, sure the problem is just a cramp, causes great pain by trying to straighten the leg. The surgeon, who doesn't listen to her about the cancer, is certain that it is a simple break, so afterwards her leg fails to support her, and surgery has to be done all over. In a classic instance of bureaucratic indifference, the school district refuses to let the couple's daughter use a school bus (she lives 20 feet outside the busing boundary). Tillman's memoir makes two major points: love can endure all stresses and pressures, and technology really needs tempering with humanity. William Beatty