Family Myths: Living Our Roles, Betraying Ourselves

Challenges the notion that humans are passive victims of their childhood experiences and explores how and why families assign false identities (e.g., the Brain, the Problem Child, etc.) to individual members. 25,000 first printing.

Since early childhood, many of us have lived with false identities assigned to us by our parents, according to psychologist Block ( Motherhood As Metamorphosis ). To the extent that we unconsciously adhere to such roles as "Mama's Boy," "Troublemaker," "Goddess" or "God," our true natures are buried or denied. Block cites figures in folklore and popular culture and relates them to the cases of patients like Sherry, a bulimic who strives to be an emotionless Snow Queen, a "bodiless spirit." Block examines the emotional needs these roles meet within the entire family, and how they work together in the family drama. She advises readers how to identify the "real self," and how to shed traits that, by playing out old myths, squelch true success and happiness. Citing the centrality of psychoanalytic and family-systems theories to her ideas, Block offers a valuable approach to psychotherapy.
Copyright 1994 Reed Business Information, Inc.

An elaborate presentation of the idea that people can get locked into fictional roles by their families. According to family therapist Block (Psychology/Notre Dame; Motherhood as Metamorphosis, 1990), the needs of parents shape the roles they assign to their children--those of the ``Family Brain,'' the ``Comedian,'' the ``Dutiful Daughter,'' the ``Black Sheep,'' etc. Originating in early childhood, these images of who we are can powerfully influence adult life. For some people, family myths are so strong that the fictional image overwhelms the real self. Case histories of some of Block's patients-- disguised for reasons of privacy--provide examples. There's Julia, cast in the role of ``Beauty,'' or the ``Ministering Angel''; Laurel, who's ``Pandora,'' or the ``Troublemaker''; Diana, who holds herself as aloof as a ``Goddess''; Sherry, who keeps slipping from ``Snow Queen'' to repulsive ``Jellyfish''; Howard, the ``Problem Child'' who grows up as an ``Outsider''; Larry, the ``Mamma's Boy'' who becomes a helpless ``Sensitive Plant''; and Vincent the ``Simpleton.'' Their stories, extensively detailed, illustrate how fictional roles are reinforced as relationships with siblings both reflect and help shape the false images; and how individuals, trapped in assigned roles, play them out as adults in other relationships--including courtship and marriage--with unhappy, even disastrous, results. As a therapist, Block encourages her patients to take responsibility for recognizing their mythic identities and finding their true selves, but just how readers can do this isn't spelled out here: Rather than offer a quick fix, the author emphasizes the understanding of how family myths shape behavior. Clearly presented theory, amply illustrated with lengthy case histories. -- Copyright ©1993, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved.

Block uses such archetypes as Cinderella and such pairings as "the Goddess" and "the Pip-squeak" to translate psychological tangles in family relationships in a way that resembles soap operas. She covers the ramifications of distorted relationships on the basis of role assignments found in personalities she has treated, observed, or heard about; she is heavy on analysis by analogy. Her qualifications, references, and observations are reasonable. Her vignettes about the problems of living out parental fantasy are vivid and have an easy-to-understand message. This could be a popular introduction to family psychology. Virginia Dwyer