Family Values: Two Moms and Their Son

A lesbian recounts her fight to legally adopt and co-parent her lover's child, describing her journey into the worlds of adoption courts and the militant activist group, Queer Nation. 25,000 first printing. Tour.

Contrary to its title, this colorful, funny and fearless memoir set in San Francisco's gay community is about a nonbiological mom--novelist Burke ( Atomic Candy )--and how she came out of the closet, became politically radicalized and committed herself to four-year-old Jessie, the biological son of her domestic partner Cheryl, who had been artificially inseminated. At first, Burke thinks of herself only as "Auntie Phyllis" in relation to Jessie, but events, richly described here--the humiliating legal process she endures to adopt Jessie, the demonstrations against the making of the film Basic Instinct in San Francisco and the assassination of Board of Supervisors member Harvey Milk--all combine to spur her into political consciousness. Her candid story starts with the couple's decision to have a baby, includes a description of the artificial insemination and proceeds from there, including juicy reportage of Burke's heated visit with actor Michael Douglas as they debate Basic Instinct 's harm to lesbians. Oddly, information about how Jessie relates to his two mothers is sketchy. But there is much to make up for that: wonderful, witty and poignant storytelling. Author tour.
Copyright 1993 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Novelist Burke (Atomic Candy, 1989) juxtaposes the story of her fight to adopt the son of her lesbian partner with an impressionistic account of her involvement in the San Francisco chapter of Queer Nation. Burke's partner Cheryl found a sperm bank sympathetic to lesbians desiring motherhood, underwent artificial insemination, and got pregnant, After Jesse was born, the author began a tortuous legal process aimed at legally becoming the boy's second mother, and, following official discouragement and a visit from an insensitive case worker, a judge permitted the adoption to go forward. Meanwhile, Burke had become increasingly drawn to Queer Nation, the activist group that has used humor and shock tactics- -such as ``queer fashion shows'' at suburban shopping malls and glitter-tossing demonstrations against the filming of Basic Instinct--to propel gay and lesbian issues into policy debate and the media. The adoption saga as chronicled by Burke is rich in drama but underdeveloped. Cheryl is only sketchily characterized; and while some vignettes--especially one in which Burke and her lover comb the house for compromising material before the case worker's visit--are vivid, other potentially fascinating incidents (for instance, meetings of a Lesbians Considering Parenthood workshop) are given short shrift. Meanwhile, the Queer Nation segments are marred by a confusing chronology and overlong profiles of movement participants; the author also fails to spell out whether she's attending meetings as a journalist or as an activist. Burke is rigorously honest about fits and starts on her journey to radicalization, but she's far too sparing in describing the formative experiences in her life pre-Jesse. An earnest, heartfelt memoir, then, but choppy and only intermittently compelling. -- Copyright ©1993, Kirkus Associates, LP. All rights reserved.

In 1987, when her partner, Cheryl, decided to have a child through "alternative insemination," San Francisco novelist Burke was not ready to make the commitment to co-parenting. Her planned role as "Aunty" changed quickly , however, as she became involved in every aspect of the "assisted conception," birth, and raising of son Jesse. Burke here chronicles her fight against her own internalized homophobia and that of a world which wants to deny her the legal right to be Jesse's second mother, interweaving such episodes as her participation in demonstrations against the movie Basic Instinct , Jesse's fascination with Peter Pan, and preparations for the Black & White Ball into a richly textured memoir. Filled with humor and insight, this intimate portrait of motherhood is recommended for all collections.
- Jim Van Buskirk, San Francisco P.L.
Copyright 1993 Reed Business Information, Inc.