Finding the Words: Candid Conversations with Loved Ones

Finding the Words offers principles and practical suggestions for those moments in relationships when one wants to be kind but also must discuss a sensitive matter. In thoughtful prose, Susan Halpern explains how to communicate with care in order to strengthen and increase our loving connections. The principles provided in the book—speaking from the heart, stating intentions, and deep listening—enable readers to navigate difficult encounters.
 
Halpern draws on her years of experience as a psychotherapist, wife, and mother to suggest possible, scripted solutions and positive outcomes for a wide range of situations: a partner who needs to talk about the irritations of joint living, parents of an adult child who requires unexpected financial support, grandparents who don’t know how to intervene, siblings who disagree about politics or religion, and couples in times of crisis, illness, affairs, and divorce. An essential book for finding one’s way back to intimacy from conflict, nagging discomfort, and anger, Finding the Words teaches methods of responding, negotiating, and compromising. While there are numerous guides to relationships, no other book presents life situations—along with actual words that can be used to cope with them—with such vitality and wisdom.

Susan P. Halpern, MSW, has been a social worker and psychotherapist for more than thirty years. Her first book, The Etiquette of Illness: What to Say When You Can't Find the Words, was praised by Bill Moyers, Cokie Roberts, and Dr. Andrew Weil and was excerpted in O, The Oprah Magazine. Halpern lives in Berkeley, CA.