George Washington Is Cash Money: A No-Bullshit Guide to the United Myths of America

PREPARE TO BE BEAKED BY THE MAJESTIC EAGLE OF HISTORY

Most of us are familiar with the greatest hits and legendary heroes of US history. In George Washington Is Cash Money, Cory O’Brien, author of Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, does away with the pomp and circumstance and calls America’s history what it is: one long, violent soap opera.

In his signature clever, crude, and cuss-ridden style, O’Brien reminds us that:

• Teddy Roosevelt stopped bullets with his manly chest
• Harriet Tubman avoided danger by having prophetic seizures.
• Joseph Smith invented Mormonism by staring into a hat full of rocks.
• Billy the Kid was finally defeated by the smell of fresh bacon.

And there’s plenty more Star Spangled stupidity where that came from!

Cory O’Brien is a word-wizard and technojester of the first degree and the creator of Myths Retold! (BetterMyths.com), as well as the author of Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, George Washington is Cash Money, and his debut novel Two Truths and a Lie. He reads and writes mythology, science fiction, and computer code. He has camped with gypsies, juggled for food, and driven across the country in a car powered by vegetable oil. Now he lives in Chicago, where he recently graduated with an MFA in writing from the School of the Art Institute of Chicago. Cory's dream is to one day travel to Mars, or at least to own a jacket made entirely of pockets.