Maintaining the Truth: A Parent and Caregiver's Guide to Help Children and Adolescents Accept Their Gifts

It is important to remember that no two children or adolescents are alike. This concept is true when discussing individuals with neurological differences. No two children or teens are alike, even if they are identical twins. However, despite these studies and data, many will continue to treat these children and teens the same, without the “disability mindset” advocated by Dr. Barkley and others in the field. Why is this? We will explore this together as you read on.
Why do so many continue to ignore the research and hold on to the longstanding non-scientific beliefs and the accompanying methods for dealing with these children and adolescents? Research has confirmed in part because the human condition accepts the default “truth.” I will discuss this in more detail later in this book. It is also likely a lack of understanding of these various neurologically based conditions.
Many involved in the research and writings of these conditions have expressed this concern. This lack of understanding makes accepting the default “untruth” or misconceptions easier. The default “untruths” are those misconceptions that have come from various sources throughout one’s life. These beliefs about various conditions and behaviors are often unchecked for facts. Unfortunately, many “untruths” or misconceptions permeate those dealing with children and adolescents with these neurological differences.
Let us, together, attempt to discover and promote the “real truth.” Let us embrace science and keep a “disability mindset,” as is the plea from Dr. Russell Barkley, to promote nurturing and problem-solving rather than punitive measures. If we model this approach, others will likely follow. How do we change these “untruths” and ultimately get others to follow? I believe that there are a few steps and, I will be frank, it is not easy. However, I believe the rewards are worth the effort.
The process begins with parents and other caregivers. In this book, I hope you will learn what you can do as parents, teachers, and other caregivers to change the “untruths or misconceptions” of the children and teens that negatively impact their lives. If you learn to approach children and adolescents from a different point of view, you have a much better chance of helping them reject these “misconceptions.” Understanding these children and their true struggles is the first step. The second step is learning how to communicate more effectively to avoid your thoughts being rejected or adding to these “untruths.”
I will be discussing effective communication tools you may use to help your children and teens with these issues. You can help them let go of the “untruths” by challenging these misconceptions and eliminating or altering them. This book is also designed to provide caregivers the skills to help these special children and adolescents establish a set of “true beliefs” based on facts, meet their goals in life, feel the way they want, and interact with others more positively.