Mastering Your Emotions with Your Spouse and Others: Seven Steps for Transforming Emotional Reactivity

Have you ever argued with someone over an insignificant issue or found yourself reacting defensively? Have you ever felt emotionally manipulated ? Welcome to the club. Emotional reactivity is a universal phenomenon. We all experience it. It can occur with our children, our spouses, our boss, or anyone we interact with. During times of emotional reactivity, the reasonable side of our mind is overwhelmed by emotion. Rational communication is replaced by unconscious emotional communication. You want to act reasonably, but instead you say or do things you regret. Emotions usually occur between people. This is why it is so important to learn how to deal with emotions in the context of your relationships. This book helps you understand emotion in an interpersonal context. You are most emotional with those you care about. When things are going well these relationships are the source of love, support and joy. Paradoxically, your closest relationships are also the ones that trigger anger, guilt, shame and fear. Learning to master your emotions will help you transform your relationships, heal yourself, and improve the quality of your life. This book enables you to: • Understand how emotional reactivity develops in relationships and families • Learn the seven steps that help you transform emotional reactivity • Tackle the number one problem that destroys communication in relationships • Understand the drawbacks of either inhibiting the expression of emotions or allowing emotional reactivity to overwhelm you • Learn the distinction between healthy emotions and emotional reactivity • Become resistant to emotional manipulation • Replace turmoil in your relationships with understanding and compassion Author and psychotherapist, Jim Piekarski, uses insights gained from cognitive behavior therapy, mindfulness, and relational psychotherapy to show you a way out of the knottiest relationship difficulties. Empower yourself with the skills to transform your most difficult relationships into healthy caring ones.

Jim Piekarski is a licensed marriage and family therapist who lives in Southern California. He is the Clinical Director of Phoenix of Santa Barbara, a non-profit agency that treats adults with mental disorders. He also is a clinical supervisor for interns and trainees who are learning to become therapists at the Salvation Army Hospitality House in Santa Barbara. He has served as an adjunct professor at various colleges in the Santa Barbara area. Mastering Your Emotions with Your Spouse and Others comes from his experience working with couples, families and individuals over the last 30 years.