Sacred Wind (Paperback)

Paperback. Welcome to the world of Sacred Wind, a tale set in an alternative reality, featuring conscious curries, headbanging sheep, telepathic cats, magic cheese, an evil Baron, some very sexy faeries, and a Welsh Viking Flatulence Rock band. Sacred Wind: The Complete Trilogy It's safe to say that the last thing Aiden Peersey expected when he began his trip to Llangollen was to meet a bunch of Welsh Vikings who played in a rock band called Sacred Wind. It's also safe to say that the technology geek and part-time sound engineer didn't expect to be catapulted into a quest to win a music tournament, to save the faerie queen, to win freedom for their land, to be able to fart freely, and to win the right to their cheese. Nevertheless, that's exactly what happened. Transported into an alternative reality by the Navigation App on his quantum computer-powered Smart Phone, Aiden discovers a land ruled by the evil Baron Blacktie, who has banned rock music, outlawed unauthorised flatulence, and made cheese sniffing a crime. He is soon immersed in a world where sheep manage pubs and play in orchestras, cats are telepathic, cheese comes from mines, and curries have consciousness (Wrexham is a 'Currydom', ruled by King Beef Vindaloo-Boiled Rice III and his wife, Queen Tikka Masala-Coconut Rice.). When the evil Baron discovers that Sacred Wind's drummer, Agnar the Hammered, owns a cheese mine that contains a potentially magic cheese, he concocts a hideous plot to make the mine his own. He challenges Sacred Wind to take part in a prestigious music tournament, and he sends his two top spies, Hob and Nob, to capture the Faerie Queen, Ophelia, who is betrothed to Sacred Wind's singer, Olaf the Berserker! And so, Aiden joins the Sacred Wind and the 'Companionship of Wind', as they embark on a perilous journey to reach the city in time for the great tournament. So, if you want to delve into a world where curries will make you laugh, where sheep will make you cry, where no-one sniggers when your first name is 'Oldfart', where you'll cheer quite a lot at the bits that have obviously been written to incite cheering, where you'll think about faeries in ways you really shouldn't, where you'll be even more scared of Traffic Wardens than you ever thought possible, where vacuum cleaners get possessed, where Welsh Vikings can have platonic relationships with English sheep, where you'll finish reading the story with a smile on your face and warmth in your heart, and where you'll want to read more as soon as you've finished, then Sacred Wind is the book for you. Sacred Wind - The Album Surely the finest debut album by a Welsh Viking Flatulence Rock band from an alternative reality. Now available at all good download stores! Featuring all the Sacred Wind tracks from the book and more: 1.A Time of Magic 2.Sacred Wind 3.Metal and Curry 4.Hurricane Ass 5.Warriors of Asgard 6.Sail With Me 7.Rock, Rock, Rock, Rock Ragnarok 8.Frigg 9.Fart For Odin 10.Dragon Ships and Women's Hips 11.My Sword is my Sword 12.The Sheep's Lament (bonus track) 13.The Power of Cheese (bonus track) This item is printed on demand. Shipping may be from our UK warehouse or from our Australian or US warehouses, depending on stock availability.…