The Sky's the Limit
Go For the Gold!By Melvin R. HallAuthorHouse
Copyright © 2009 Dr. Melvin R. Hall
All right reserved.ISBN: 978-1-4389-8775-0Contents
Aspiring to Inspire Before Expiring......................................1A State of Bliss.........................................................3Avoiding Bitterness......................................................6"Back in the Day...."....................................................9Beauty in Simplicity.....................................................13Being Better Than We Are.................................................16Being Inclusive..........................................................19Being Intelligently Ignorant.............................................22Being Too Critical of Self...............................................26Blessed: Neither Boasting Nor Complaining................................29Blessings Ever Overflowing!..............................................32Busy Enough!.............................................................34Brilliant People.........................................................37Changes and Challenges...................................................40Children in Crisis.......................................................43Chronic Complainers......................................................46Communication............................................................49Comparing Ourselves to Others............................................54"Coincidence"............................................................57Confusing Miracles and Magic.............................................60Confusion................................................................63Consistency..............................................................66Counseling...............................................................69Dare to Be Different!....................................................72Dealing with Passive-Aggressive Behavior.................................75Decisions! Decisions! Decisions!.........................................79Diplomacy................................................................82Disagreeing Peacefully...................................................84Divine Harmony...........................................................87Divine Intervention......................................................89Diplomacy and Constructive Criticism.....................................92Do You Love Yourself?....................................................95Dreams...................................................................97Empowerment..............................................................100Energy: Positive and Negative............................................103Equality.................................................................105Everybody Has A Dream!...................................................107Everyone Has A Story!....................................................110"Exposing Your Button"...................................................113Facing Problems..........................................................116Facts Versus Opinions....................................................118Forgiving and Forgetting.................................................120Fortunate or Blessed?....................................................122Freudian Theory on Human Behavior........................................125"From A Caterpillar to A Butterfly"......................................129From Self-Rejection to Self-Acceptance...................................132Functioning From the Heart...............................................135Genuine Friends..........................................................139Go For the Gold!.........................................................141"God is For Real, Man"...................................................144God is Utterly Awesome and Greatly Amazing!..............................147Godparents Are Very Special People.......................................150Gratification: Immediate or Delayed......................................153Great Expectation!.......................................................156Harmony..................................................................158"Happiness"..............................................................161Healthy Thinking and Physical Condition..................................163How to Be Distinguished and Important....................................166Joy......................................................................169Judging or Not Judging A Book By Its Cover...............................171Just Beyond the Darkness.................................................174Keys to Achieving Your "Impossible" Dream................................177Ladies and Gentlemen.....................................................180Life Can Be Sweeter......................................................183Living with Regrets......................................................186Looking on the Bright Side...............................................189Love, Compassion, Grace and Mercy........................................191Love Personified.........................................................194Lucky? "No" - Blessed? "Yes".............................................197Magnetism: That Special Attraction.......................................201Mapping Our Lives with the Power of Love.................................204Me, Myself and I.........................................................207Mind Over Matter.........................................................210Misplacing Things!.......................................................213Much Ado About Nothing!..................................................216Nipping It in the Bud....................................................219Not Complaining - Just Explaining........................................223Not Getting Sidetracked..................................................226Not Letting Procrastination Deter Our Blessings..........................229Nothing Lasts Forever!...................................................232Our Common Bond..........................................................234Our Dependent Adult-Child and Tough Love.................................237"Out of the Blue"........................................................240Overlooking the Obvious..................................................243Oysters & Pearls.........................................................247"Please, Can You Spare A Hug?"...........................................250Pseudo-Power and Real Power..............................................253Students: Passing and Excelling..........................................256Sweet People with Flaws..................................................259Stubbornness.............................................................262Talking and Communicating................................................265Talking to Ourselves.....................................................267Tears of Joy.............................................................270Telepathic Communication.................................................272"Thank You!".............................................................275The Blame Game...........................................................278The Brain: Our Innate Personal Computer..................................281The Choices We Make......................................................284The Core of Your Being...................................................287The Damaging Effect of Toxic Thinking....................................291The Epitome of Intelligence..............................................294The Freudian Mystique....................................................297The Gift of Laughter.....................................................301The Giving of Love.......................................................304The Highs and the Lows in Life: These Too Shall Pass.....................308The Holy Ghost Party.....................................................311The Human Touch..........................................................315The Person in Your Mirror................................................318The Seeds We Sow.........................................................321The Strength of Our Endurance............................................324The Sweetness of Forgiving...............................................328There is No Better Time Than the Present.................................331Time Management and Organization.........................................334Transformation...........................................................337Two Bosom Buddies: Envy & Jealousy.......................................341Unconditional Love, Compassion, Grace & Mercy............................343Unsolicited Advice.......................................................346Veneer...................................................................349What is A Worry Wart?....................................................354When God Speaks!.........................................................356When Little Things Mean So Much..........................................359When Your Friend Becomes Your Foe........................................362
Chapter One
Aspiring to Inspire Before Expiring
"... I have prayed for you, that your faith will not fail; and when you are converted, strengthen your brothers." Luke 22:32
A dear friend either begins or closes here-mail with saying something cheerful. And I notice that the advice she gives, she honestly feels. Can you imagine what our world would be like if each of us did this on a daily basis to everyone we meet?
Every day we find ourselves in the land of the living, we can find someone needing to be inspired. I am sure you know what the word means, but for my own sake and to encourage you, I am going to share what Mr. Webster has to say about the word "inspire."
But first we have to aspire to inspire so let us be sure we know what the word aspire as well. Aspire is to have an ambition to do something or to want to do something. Some meanings for the word inspire are influence, bring about, and stir into action.
When we see a person looking sad, perhaps we can say something kind and uplifting. By lifting the person's spirit, we inspire him or her. When we lift a person's spirit, ours automatically is lifted. Saying something kind to someone often causes the person to smile, and we all know what a smile does.
We won't bother with the term "expire" because when that happens all conversation about anybody who has experienced it, evokes the use of the verb "was." We need to stay in the "now."
Children are so impressionable and the best gift you can give them is to tell them how well they did something, even how nice their mud pies are if they still make them today. Of course, they have more expensive toys these days. Some would not be caught playing with mud! But whatever they are doing, inspire them.
We expend too much energy telling people what's wrong with them rather what is right.
We need to hear that what we do is appreciated and be encouraged to do better.
When we bring something to a person's attention that needs correcting, why not mention first their good qualities and what you like about them? Then when you do mention possible corrections, why not soften it a bit? The world is not going to fall apart because of mistakes or a person's inappropriate handling of a matter or an incident.
Let's say that you as an administrator overheard one of your supervisors speaking harshly to another worker and you aspire to inspire the supervisor to be kinder. How do you think you should handle it so that the person begins to aspire to inspire rather than condemn or ridicule?
Your first impulse may be to give the person a "taste of his or her own medicine" but that would prove nothing and not help anyone. But to show the supervisor how to correct a worker will enable the supervisor to function better and enable the worker to feel inspired. Here's an example:
An administrator says to the supervisor, "I can understand your frustration in having to correct your supervisees as often as it is required, and you are a good supervisor. Do you think it would be better if you spoke in a softer tone? Do you think that the person you are correcting will be more acceptable to your instructions? Suppose you speak to her as I am speaking to you? Our jobs require that we enable people to correct their mistakes. How do you feel by my approach to you? I hope that you will extend the same courtesy to your worker as I am extending to you. Okay?"
The way we treat others ought to show the way we want to be treated. So since we all like to be inspired, inspiring others sends a message for others to inspire us. And, do it now - everyday - because it is too late once we have expired. You get my drift?
The way we treat others ought to show the way we want to be treated.
Chapter Two
A State of Bliss
"..the joy of the Lord is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10 (NIV)
We may not verbalize it, but each of us would like to experience a state of bliss. Some may ask, "What is meant by a state of bliss?" It is a feeling of peace, joy and happiness. It is a feeling of being wanted, being loved, being accepted as people worthy of recognition and respect. We crave these feelings whether we are able to verbalize them or not.
We were created to enjoy life in abundance. A multiplicity of problems exists because of the lack of sense of wholeness. Each person unconsciously seeks to find what he or she was created to enjoy. To be able to laugh and enjoy life is one of the many blessings of humankind. To be able to enjoy the company of others is a predisposed blessing that is given to us from our birth. It is a desire to feel high.
However, it is most unfortunate that too many people find artificial and nefarious ways of trying to reach a state of euphoria that makes them think they are "feeling good." In doing so they find themselves breaking the law and doing great damage to their minds and bodies. Their "sense" of high causes them to experience false grandiose and unrealistic mild-altering negative thoughts placing them in a strange world without connection to the real world. Their grossly damaging "high" destroys them and their relationship with their loved ones who love them unconditionally, but feel so helpless in their quest to get them to realize the damage they are doing to themselves and their relationships. Do you find yourself in this situation? If not, do you have loved ones who are?
I don't want to remain with this thought. Being a positive person, I am going to move on with my thoughts and speak on the "real high", "True High" and "blessed" high we were created to experience and enjoy.
We were created in this vast universe with the wherewithal to not only obtain greatness for ourselves, but to encourage all persons we meet to be the best that they can be. We should be able to invoke laughter and lightheartedness. We should be able to smile and to bring good cheer to the stranger we encounter in our day to day living. We should be able to offer hope to those who seem to wallow in a sense of hopelessness. We should be able to introduce others to the One who created us in this wonderful place we live in.
Our Creator expressed great loving care and smiled at the completion of each creation saying, "That is good!" After creating the best for us, He crated us to enjoy it all. (I refer to the book of Genesis in the Bible.) The book also warns us in a most interesting way of the deterrents in life which would keep us from enjoying the best that life has to offer. This portion refers to the "tree of knowledge." I strongly suggest that if you have read about the "tree" you read again slowly and prayerfully. If you have not read it, I suggest you do because it will whet your desire to read more and reading more will show you how to take full advantage of what has been created for you and me by the One who loves us unconditionally.
What can possibly exceed being loved unconditionally? Absolutely nothing! Just think. Even persons who are doing great harm to themselves and their bodies and minds in trying to obtain their "high" by artificial / nefarious means are loved by the One Who created them. They are still precious to Him and always will be.
There is a song with the words, "There is nothing like the real thing baby!" I submit to you that this is a true statement. The real thing is what the Creator offers. So you have tried your way. Where has it gotten you? Why not try the real thing and see what happens? You cannot possibly make it on your own. There is help. All you have to do is go to someone whom God has created and simply say, "Please help me. I am caught up in a wicked vice, using stuff that is hurting me and I want to rid myself of this demon. I am looking for happiness, peace, and contentment." If you find yourself not able to go to someone, just sit, stand, or fall on your knees and just plead to the One who will give you the strength and direct you to willing arms, ready to take you to the Source that will provide the help you need. There are many who have done just that and have found the real thing.
We were created in this vast universe with the wherewithal to not only obtain greatness for ourselves, but to encourage all persons we meet to be the best they can be.
Chapter Three
Avoiding Bitterness
"Wherefore is light given to him that is in misery, and life unto the bitter is sod." Job 3:20 (KJV)
Bitterness rears its ugly head in many forms. It has many companions and they aren't lovely. Some of its many bosom pals are resentment, anger, jealousy, and hatred. If we want to dwell on bitterness, we could think of many more. However, the purpose of this essay is to talk about avoiding it, not perpetuating it.
Oh, how we endanger ourselves by courting any one of bitterness's companions! Each one alone can do great damage to the body and the human spirit. Each is an attacker. Each can make sure that life is tough and rough and perhaps lead to an early grave. Can you imagine it if we allowed them to work together? It is a strong possibility that we would find ourselves spaced out in a mental institution. But we don't want to go there. So what can we do?
The good news is - it can be avoided. We are blessed with the ability to make choices. You may ask, "How?" The answer is we can be the master of our own destiny. We can trust the inherent power within ourselves.
We have the ability to think positively or negatively. Positive thinking leads to positive emotions and those emotions lead to like behavior. So positive thinking frees us from those monsters. While some persons are entertaining bitterness and its companions, others are giving them the boot by refusing to get caught up in their mess. We don't have to follow others' bad choices. Because others are disrespectful toward us, we don't have to respond in kind. Let us look at each companion of bitterness separately and not only discover what each is, but how to avoid it.
Resentment does not like someone to accomplish more, give more, or be more successful than it. What resentful people fail to realize is that if they spent the same amount of time praising and rejoicing with the successful ones, they too, would be successful in their endeavors. People who love seeing others achieving cannot help but achieve their dreams, aspirations and goals.
Anger can cause resentment and it comes with no small amount of acidity. Acid burns and destroys and causes one to be consumed with bitterness. It does great damage to the person who holds it. It may encourage one to plot against another to do harm. It keeps a person from being productive. Getting rid of the feeling can enable and empower the person to be a winner or be successful in the fruition of their dreams, aspirations and goals. And they will be able to sleep well.
Jealousy and hatred act as if they are conjoined twins. Whenever such persons are in the presence of the object of their jealousy, they are so consumed by it that they lose all sense of reasoning. They cannot concentrate on what they should be about. If they would only realize that they are just as capable and can accomplish whatever they set their mind to, they would be free to put forth whatever efforts are required to succeed. They would also realize their inherent gifts, talents and abilities, and in realizing, will see there is absolutely no reason to be jealous.
Hatred becomes an illness. The mere mention of the name of the one being hated makes the hater ill. The illness may manifest itself as an emotional or mental breakdown. It is a disastrous feeling sometimes becoming dangerous and perhaps deadly. Some persons who are experiencing this bitterness may not remember why they harbor such feeling or when it began. Their cloudy mind (thinking) gathers more negative ideas overtime. Those persons need some kind of help. Depending upon the depth of their hatred, they may need professional help. Once the help is sought and heeded, the persons would be free to go about their business and become winners.
All of these "conditions" keep persons from being free. Once the chain is broken, they can become very successful. Most of the time their new freedom causes them to work extremely hard because they want to make up for wasted time. One can never make up time. As long as the past remains the past, whatever one does that is positive today will pay big dividends either today or tomorrow.
We are blessed with the ability to make choices. We can be the master of our own destiny.
Chapter Four
"Back in the Day ...."
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud." I Corinthians 13:4 (NIV)
"Back in the day...." sentences are very frequently heard coming from younger and older adults alike these days.
This reminds me of a very important rule of respect which I was taught over three quarters of a century ago, and it is as important to me now as then. Embodied in respect is the rule of good manners.
A part of good manners is the use of such words as "please, " "thank you," "excuse me" - all accompanied by a smile. It would be nice if people who refer to "back in the day" would make sure that we recall and exercise such courtesies.
I am sorry to say that today one sees too much discourteous behavior which seems to indicate most people seem quite angry. A smile ought to induce a smile, but I have heard it asked, "What are you smiling at?" That was a mild question. That question also has been punctuated with some choice words and instead of a smile - a frown - letting you know that the person did not appreciate an unknown smiling person (stranger) at him or her.
When we think about respect and disrespect, "back in the day" it was linked to age.
Now age does not matter anymore. A child at any age may consider himself or herself equal in status to any older adult. I still believe that in order to get respect one has to give it; but I have seen respectful adults being disrespected just on general principle by children of all ages but especially teens.
The use of foul language is not only distasteful but disrespectful, and is often used with great ease and at great volume. Some people young and old seem to want to be heard by persons who haven't the slightest interest in their conversation. Now that cell phones are widely used, persons talking on them must be speaking to someone on the other end who suffers from partial deafness.
When we talk about "back in the day," certainly someone must ask "What has happened to "Do unto others as we would want done unto us?" (Matthew 7:12)
Similarly, we can also ask what has happened to "Teach (train) a child in the way he/she should go so that when he/she is older will not depart from it?" The book of Proverbs in the Bible is rich in instructions to parents and to children. There was a time in most households the Bible was read daily; the family would gather and the head of the household would read. Depending upon their age, children were encouraged to participate in the discussions. I wonder how many households take the time to read together today.
I strongly believe that whatever profession people eventually embrace, their best skills are grounded in how they perform in terms of interacting with others. An example is a doctor who exerts patience and listening skills, perhaps this was learned in his or her home as a youngster. Teachers, lawyers, bus drivers, taxi drivers, and clerks: in fact, all persons employed or unemployed should treat those with whom they come in contact with the same measure of decency and respect they want to receive. This is true "back in the day behavior." Interacting lovingly with others is a must-have skill whether one was taught (or not taught) this in their home.
Being a one parent provider is no excuse for not bringing up a child in the way he or she should grow. Whether one is poor or rich should not matter. There is no price tag on respect. Home is the foundation; that is where we learn how to function in our world.
(Continues...)
Excerpted from The Sky's the Limitby Melvin R. Hall Copyright © 2009 by Dr. Melvin R. Hall. Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
