Space Rocks!

It all happened because of Feeney's Original Astronaut Ice Cream. Those accursed pink bars entranced me with their sugary magic! 

Life on Gelo was fine until the fur-headed "humans" arrived. They invaded our asteroid with their loud drill machines and their endless greed, stealing our precious iridium to take back to their weird-looking blue-and-green planet. Then the mothership took off and four little fur-heads were marooned here. 

Luckily, the "kids" have cool things like hologram games and rocket bikes. And they know how to pilot starships! 

But there's plenty the junior humans don't know, like how to fight a feral thyss-cat or ride an usk-lizard. They're decidedly terrible at dealing with my stink gland (yes, we Xotonians have a stink gland). And they definitely seem powerless against the Vorem, a terrifying breed of rival alien that nightmares are made of. 

Thank goodness the Earthlings have me and all five of my eyes to look after them! If only I knew how to help them get back home. . . .

Tom O'Donnell has written for the New Yorker, McSweeney's, Atari, and the TV show Trip Tank on Comedy Central. His comic strips have been featured in the New York Press, Village Voice, and other papers. He lives with his wife in Brooklyn.