Lots of individuals in society today are feeble-minded. They don't know what the HELL is going on. Unfortunately many of these people are responsible for running THE COUNTRY. They don't know the difference between a PRECIOUS JEWEL and a piece of animal turd. Their ideas are MEANINGLESS, illustrated using RUBBISH imagery (often made by a computer). The stupid words they write are always in BAD FONTS.
Yet still people HEED this nonsense. Maybe YOU are one of these people?
It's alright. I am here to HELP you. I have a FULLY-COMPOSED WORLD VIEW. I have STRONG opinions about EVERYTHING. And my ideas are HAND-ILLUSTRATED and use REAL HANDWRITING that you can trust. I know exactly what's going on and am WILLING to share my thoughts with you. If you LISTEN to what I say then things will quickly improve.

No more weak messages. No more bad situations. Shall we proceed?

About the Author

David Shrigley was born in Macclesfield in 1968 and studied at Glasgow School of Art. His work has been exhibited at the Tate Modern in London, at the MoMA in New York, and in Paris, Berlin, Melbourne and beyond. He has published over twenty books, and has animated a music video for Blur and produced another for Bonnie 'Prince' Billy. His work has also been profiled in a documentary for Channel 4. He was nominated for the Turner Prize in 2013 and he is the latest artist to be selected to display a sculpture on Trafalgar Square's fourth plinth. He lives and works in Glasgow.

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