The Wrinklies Guide to Growing Old Disgracefully

The perfect gift for cool grandparents, this catalog of elderly misbehavior includes tips on extreme sports for the not-so-young, how to party like it's 1959, and achieving the effects of illegal drugs legally

Heroin is also said to give you a warm feeling like being wrapped in cotton wool. So clearly the wrinklies' legal equivalent to heroin is a nice snugly foot warmer or one of those blankets with arm holes.

Growing older doesn't mean you have to grow up. If you're the sort of golden oldie who still likes to party hard, chats up strangers in bars, listens to loud music—and not because your hearing is going, or dresses so outrageously that your grandchildren beg you to "tone it down," this book is for you. It is full of irreverent advice on how to misbehave and put the younger generation to shame, including pick-up lines for swinging wrinklies: Tell me gorgeous—do I come here often? or I can't quite reach to nibble your ear, but if I give you my dentures will you do it for yourself? this is a hilarious celebration of misspent seniority.

Mike Haskins is a comedy researcher and writer of books, jokes, and sketches. Clive Whichelow is a journalist and comedy writer. They previously collaborated on The Wrinklies' Armchair Companion, Wrinklies' Bedside Companion, and Wrinklies Joke Book 2.