Deborah Wollnik
Author Biography (Acts 2:17)
I was once a victim of extreme "narcissistic" emotional, psychological and physical abuse. I was made the family “Scapegoat” from very young.
According to the Bible, all people are born sinners and therefore are all “narcissists.” It is the degree that varies from one to another. Some narcissists learn to hide behind masks growing progressively worse in their sinful state with time.
Other narcissists recognize their own sinful ways, as did I and repent seeking forgiveness. When believers receive Jesus Christ as our Lord and Saviour, He helps us “Overcome a Life of Narcissism” dying to self daily through Bible Study and prayer.
The Bible says we are born sinful since the fall (Romans 5:12). This means that we are born with only sinful tendencies and no ability to be “good” or righteous on our own. What we call “human nature” the Bible calls “the flesh” (Galatians 5:19-21). Part of our sin nature is a total focus on self.
Narcissists remain “spiritually bankrupt” due to their “puffed up” insolent pride, stubbornness and rebellion toward God and man alike. They are recognized by their conceit, haughtiness, pathological lies, manipulation, envy, and jealousy. They possess a sense of grandiosity and a sense of entitlement. The above sins from a Biblical perspective, stem from conditions of their hardened heart due to pride, which is the root of all sin. (See Proverbs 16:18; Philippians 2:4)
Well educated narcissists in professional positions may be knowledgeable, but they lack Godly wisdom, understanding, and empathy because they are “unsaved.” Knowledge without wisdom is useless. It is always good to test the spirits more specifically when seeking out counseling to ensure the person you confide in is not a malignant narcissist!
Pride is a reason narcissist's:-
Feel the do not need help, why fix what is not broken?
Feel they are good people with good hearts and do not need a Saviour.
They remain blind to their sin, therefore, do not seek forgiveness.
They are deceived, remaining deaf and blind to their sin
They live in denial of their sinful condition.
They do not apologize or take responsibility or accountability for their sinful words spoken or actions.
They mask their sin due to their pride and run from the truth which exposes their sin.
Narcissistic traits can be dangerous as they will stop at nothing to protect their fragile egos.
They will set out to destroy those who oppose them. (2 Timothy 3:2-8; Romans 7:5).
They remain slaves to the flesh until they place their faith in Jesus, who sets the captives free (Romans 7:14-25; John 8:34-36).
Go NO CONTACT!
Believers when saved become slaves to righteousness as the Holy Spirit begins the transforming work of sanctification in their lives which is what happened with me. It is imperative that believers surrender their lives to the Lord and humble themselves to have God’s perspective rather than a narcissistic one (Mark 8:34). The process of sanctification is godly repentance thus turning away from self (narcissism) and turning toward Jesus. As an overcomer in Christ, I depend on God for direction, fulfillment, and strength to follow His plan for my life."
“Deborah is confident in God’s word, God’s will, God’s work, and God’s way.” (Judges 4-10.)
Deborah went in search of the truth that set her free. She spent over a decade researching narcissism and the dynamics within dysfunctional families which has been evident since the beginning of time.
Deborah found the Bible to be a great comfort in her darkest hours as it spoke truth into her life. Deborah personally believes in Nouthetic (Biblical) counseling as opposed to secular (worldly) counseling which does not deal with the root cause of man's affliction, our sinful nature.
Deborah took her “mess” and gave it to God who “turned it into her message!”
He has graciously given Deborah double for her former trouble and has turned her life around.
“It is not how you start that matters but rather how you finish.”
Deborah celebrates 20 years of marriage to her husband who is also her best friend on the 16 April 2019.
They have no children but do have four loving huskies, one labrador cross and two cats.
They spend their spare time swimming or rowing in vast bodies of water, hiking in the outdoors and mountain biking in nature.
Jesus Christ who is the Bible remains their foundation for everyday living.
Born in Southern Africa Deborah has come across many troubled people, who were born into this world from parents who had no vision or a workable plan on raising their children. Alternatively, they were not equipped emotionally or financially to take on the responsibility of child-rearing.
Deborah believes children deserve to be born into an environment in which love, support, encouragement, and cooperation within the family unit is active. She firmly believes the relationship between a child's parents is the foundation for their family unit.
Regrettably, this has not been the case in many homes and has sadly impacted negatively on these children, who usually grow up to be unhappy adults, never fully understanding why they feel and act the way they do. They then go onto producing unhappy children, who bear the brunt of the scars left behind from their parent's pasts, and so a pattern develops which gets passed down through the generations.
Deborah, being highly intuitive and sensitive to the needs of people around her was inspired to do study and research into various topics including family relationships, parenting and the dynamics of dysfunctional families. Deborah's interest and passion have motivated her to reach out to others through her writing to share her wisdom with her readers.
Deborah has taken what she has learned and transformed her knowledge into story form hoping her readers will find some comfort and hope believing there is a brighter future for those who believe. Deborah writes books that will hopefully make a difference in peoples lives who go in search of the truth that will set them free!
