Kenneth David Brubacher

Kenneth David Brubacher was born into a large family of “sort of” Mennonites in Elmira, through no fault of his own. He was encouraged to make an attempt at becoming a normal human being, but with limited success. To the surprise of nearly everyone he graduated from secondary school in 1970. From there he traveled the world extensively turning his hand to many kinds of jobs and eventually returned to Elmira having accomplished very little. He got work as a millwright but it soon was clearly evident that he was a “millwrong”. After being mercifully fired from that job he went trucking and almost immediately distinguished himself summa cum laude (with oak leaf cluster and Silver Star) by destroying the truck.

He got married and begat two lovely daughters, which took after their mother in many wonderful ways and turned out normal. It was considered a blessing that he had no sons because there was a high degree of probability that if he had sons the little morons would turn out like their dad.